Shut Up and Love Me

I've banged my head against the wall, scrapped skin off my knee, and lost another thousand brain cells in...banging my head against the wall. Why, I ask the all mighty somewhere out there, why weren't we all born with the knowing of what the other wanted? Maybe that way I wouldn't have a pounding headache and raw skin on my knees at this moment. Most disgustingly inaccurate movies showed you what typical girls wanted. Flowers, candy, a kiss in the rain, maybe even slow passionate mind blowing sex.

Most guys complain about girls who were so overly sensitive, whiny and obsessive and here I was. Here I was rubbing my temples wondering what in God's name made me fall in love with her. She was your first class sarcastic queen with an attitude that made you look at her ass, only to see what was shoved deep in there. She had this wild way of viewing things and not in an optimistic way. Everything about her was hysterical but laugh at her, and bones would be broken. For a five foot three human being she was seven feet tall on the inside and had better access to your balls when she felt like causing you pain. Why am I in love with her? I don't even know.

" Bro, you're going to end up denting your skull, do you mind like...stepping away from the wall?" I looked at him miserably. Not only was I causing myself misery, but I still didn't know what to do. " I've got exactly two hours to come up with a story. Two hours to tell her how I feel or just let the bitch walk out of here."

" Why are you even trying man, the chick is a complete terrorist bomb. If she doesn't kill you then you are one lucky mother fucker, that is for sure." patting me on the back, I watched him as he shook his head and walked down the hallway. I groaned again as I laid my head back on the wall. A thousand more brain cells to loose.
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" He sent me flowers, and a card! And look at this, he even got me a box of Dove chocolates! Guys, this is serious. I mean what guy actually goes through the trouble of buying you dove chocolate instead of that cheap shit at Walmart!" Rosie rolled her eyes as she stared at the girl. What a waste of time. Flowers, chocolates, a fucking card? What she didn't understand was why the hell would someone give you flowers? They wither and die within the first few days. Is that like a symbol of how long you'll last with the douche fuck, that would be a yes. What she didn't understand the most though, was how much the brand of chocolate mattered when clearly most girls were shitting themselves over counted calories.

" I'm so excited, I swear he's taking it to the next step!" And what was the next step? Ripping your clothes off then leaving you in an unfamiliar bed? Bitch please. She stood up quickly grabbing her lunch and walking out of the lunch room. She hated today, not only because every girl in the school would wet their panties, but because boys would bullshit every one of them the best they could. She hated Valentine's Day. It was like the day of second grade gifts and teenage dirt bags. It was the day that immature children acted as if two dollar gifts were the symbol of their undying love for each other.

She walked aimlessly around the halls until she saw him, Dane Cooper. His head rested against the wall as his fists leaned against it. She tilted her head slightly studying then came to the conclusion of going up to him.
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" You do know that you look mentally retarded and will be if you keep doing that, right?" Her voice made the spit in my lungs freeze as I barely managed to lift my head off the wall.

"uh..." I managed to straighten myself out while clearing my throat the best way possible. What to do with my hands... I put them in my pockets as the cold sweat started to drip from my finger tips.

" What the hell happened to you?" Her voice was this strange combination of amusement and sarcasm as she leaned against the locker next to me. Her dark brown eyes were like two bottomless pits of hell threatening to make me have a hard on. Fuck my life.

" Uh, nothing, nothing. Just a little stressed is all uh...what are you doing here?" Everyone was somewhere and had someone to be with on this wonderful day of love. She stood there rolling her eyes as I tried not to drool over the fact that she looked hot in her jean jacket and summer dress in the middle of February.

" Escaping from the depths of hell called Girls on valentine's day, how about you? Did you get shot down or something? Because you look like shit." She was always such a bitch, an intense, cruel, agonizing bitch and I loved that. The way she'd look at me as if I were pathetic, the way she'd flip her hair back when it bothered her. Why couldn't she be a little more simple?

" No, but I will. I'm guessing no Valentine for you?"

" Ha!" She snorted as she tipped her head back. Why was she doing this to me?
" Yeah right. Carnations are going around like a fucking fire when their the flowers of death, not the flowers of love. Thoughtless candy boxes are being thrown out like fucking bombs. What else... oh the word I love you, has become the new That's what she said. Really dude, hop off it. Me and valentine's Day is like Carrie Leon and carbs."

She studied her nail as she looked back at me. She smirked softly as I felt my throat tighten.
" Oh my god, you were going to ask me to be your Valentine weren't you?"

My eyes widened, either she would kick my ass now, or keep me in suspense and kick me later. I stuttered trying to find the words, Damn it Dane get it together, you pussy.

" Psh, No, no...Why would I ask you. You're like.....the devil." I could feel myself clearing my throat while she gave me a skeptical look. ah shit.

" Uh huh, sure. You know for a fact that you so wanted to ask me..." For the first time I noticed something in her. Behind her ego was a bit, may I say it, hope. The devil had feelings! I could feel myself rise in confidence as I smirked back at her.

" And you know for a fact that you wanted me to ask you."

" Oh please, you're so full of shit."

" No actually you're full of shit, evil, and a whole lot of bitching but I can clearly see you want me just as bad as I want you."

" Oh please, you're a fucking guy who could barely grow half a ball to ask me to homecoming last spring and now you're trying to be all cool..." I couldn't help it, she was driving me nuts. I don't know if it was the way her curly hair went everywhere or if it was her perfume, but by god I was kissing her and nothing was cutting off my circulation down below.

It took her a good minute and a half to finally realize that she wasn't killing me for her to give in. Valentine's day was supposed to be the day you and your loved one spent the day acting like love sick idiots. It was the day love making was encouraged. It was the day where pink and red blinded your eyes from anything. Here I was kissing the monster of my dreams, and covering my balls with my hands...just in case.

I broke contact with her lips sighing softly, looking at her.

" God I hate Valentine's Day..." She said softly looking at me. I nodded my head not really knowing what to do.

" I just have one question for you. Most girls want candy and glitter, and teddy bears. What the fuck does a girl like you want on Valentine's day?"

She smiled softly looking at the ground, softly tucking away a strand of hair. " I want to go home, watch Zombie movies and eat Chinese take out."

I couldn't help but laugh hysterically. Here I was panicking, wondering and hoping. Here I was thinking that she could be like any other girl. Rosie Chamberlain was nothing but a freak, and I liked it.

" I have planet terror at home, and I could manage some Chinese take out. That is of course, unless you want me to buy you flowers of death and fattening candy?"

" Shut up and love me, mother fucker."

And that's exactly what I did.