Why Do I Put Myself in These Situations?

“Oh, no!” I breathed. I bolted for the door, knocking over a milkshake on someone’s table in my wake.

Behind me, Kyle was saying, “Melanie—what’s going on? Wait up!”

I ran outside and looked around frantically. Where was he? Where was Jonathan? I peered up the street. There. On the sidewalk. Walking away.

“Jonathan!” I called out. “Jonathan, please! Please listen to me!”

Suddenly, he turned around, and even from a distance he looked furious. He stood there and waited for me to catch up. When I did, I felt that guilt stab into my heart once again, fierce and indestructible.

“I thought we were friends,” he said blankly.

I flinched at his usage of past-tense. “We are friends, Jonathan,” I said gently. I placed a hand on his arm. He shrugged it away.

“You lied to me,” he accused in a harsh tone. “Why? Why would you do that, Melanie? Why would you lie to me about what you were doing tonight? Why didn’t you just tell me you were going out with Kyle?”

“I didn’t want to hurt you,” I whispered, looking down at the ground, afraid to meet his eyes.

Jonathan made an exasperated sound. “Really. And how’s that working out for you?”

I snapped my head up so that I could meet his gaze, suddenly defiant. He could be sarcastic all he wanted, but he was going to know that I didn’t mean him any harm.

“You listen to me, Jonathan Cook, and you listen well,” I said, refusing to break the hold I had on his eyes. “When you called, I had already made plans with Kyle to celebrate him being out of the hospital. After all that’s gone on between the three of us, I didn’t want you to think that I was choosing my boyfriend over my best friend. I wasn’t sure if you’d still be sensitive about the whole situation or not, and if you were, I wasn’t about to make things worse for you. So I lied and said that Lindsay had called at that I had plans with her. You weren’t supposed to ever know about me and Kyle going out tonight, simply because I didn’t want your feelings hurt. I’m sorry if that’s not good enough for you, Jonathan, but it was the best I could do.”

With that, I turned on my heel and began to walk away from him. I could see Kyle in the distance, looking worried. But then I felt a hand on my shoulder and I turned around to see Jonathan. He didn’t look the least bit angry anymore, but his face was impassive, so I was wary. I couldn’t tell what he was thinking.

“Has anyone ever told you,” Jonathan began, “that you’re an amazing person?”

I smiled at him.

“I understand, Mel. And I’m sorry about…well, everything.”

“Thanks, Jonathan. And hey, you wanna come join us? It might be nice to have someone without a broken bone getting up to get napkins and what not. Besides, I don’t know how much longer Kyle will be able to hobble around back there.”

We looked back to see Kyle using a lamppost for balance and laughed.

“Sure, Mel. Thanks.”

“No, Jonathan—thank you.”

* * *

Later on that evening, Kyle and I were sitting on this bench in the park in town. Jonathan had gone home, saying that he would let us have the rest of the night to ourselves. And all in all, we’d enjoyed our time tonight—Jonathan, Kyle, and I. It was fun, and there hadn’t been any awkwardness between us at all.

“So, what do you want to do tomorrow?” I asked Kyle, leaning my head against his shoulder.

I felt rather than saw Kyle shrug. “Anything. As long as we’re together. I just want to be with you. That’s all I need.”

I smiled as he kissed my forehead. “You make me seem like every man’s dream.”

I turned my face toward him as he said, “No…you’re much, much better.”

I laughed and gave him a light, playful shove. “Okay, okay. Enough with the mushy stuff.”

Kyle grinned and gave me a quick kiss on the lips. “Sorry,” he said, though he was clearly enjoying all the corniness of the conversation.

I looked out at the lake sitting in front of the park, at the reflection of the stars and the moon in the water. How everything seemed to shimmer with life.

“It’s beautiful,” I commented quietly.

Kyle said, “It would be…if you weren’t sitting here in comparison.”

“Oh, shut up!” I said, elbowing him. We laughed, and he laced his fingers through my own.

“You know,” Kyle said, suddenly serious. “We’ve been through a lot, you and I. And in such a short time, too.”

“Crazy, isn’t it?”

“Yeah. But…I was just thinking….” He hesitated for a moment.

“Thinking about what?” I prodded, looking up into his indecisive eyes.

“I was just thinking that…I don’t think I could have gone through all we’ve gone through with someone else…and still felt the same way about them by the end of it.”

“Your feelings would have changed,” I clarified. “If I were…someone else.”

Kyle nodded. “Yeah, they would have. But, I guess, in a way…they’ve changed with you, too.”

I was suddenly too tense, afraid of what he might be about to say. Had he changed his mind? Did he not want to be with me anymore? I wasn’t sure I could handle it if that were the case.

“How?” I choked out, trying to stay calm. “How have they changed?”

Kyle looked deep into my eyes. “When I saw you that first time, Mel…I knew that you were beautiful. As we got to know each other and became closer…I knew that I liked you. A lot. And now that I’ve realized that I don’t want to spend a day without you…I know that I feel differently.”

Kyle placed a hand on my cheek gently, and then said, “I love you, Melanie.”

I felt first relief that he wasn’t leaving me, then shock…then unbelievable happiness.

“I love you, too, Kyle,” I said, and then I pressed my lips to his.

And it was then that I knew that no one could ever be for me what Kyle was. He would always be there for me no matter what, because he loved me, and I loved him back. The connection we shared was unlike any I’d ever felt before, and didn’t think I’d ever feel again. And as he kissed me under a blanket of stars, I knew that I’d never be happier.