All We Are

The next morning, I woke up earlier than usual. Rather than going back to bed, I decided to take a shower and get ready for the long day ahead of me. It was the day that we were bringing Kurt to rehab. Knocking on the bathroom door proved its vacancy, and I went inside. After showering and getting dressed, I went downstairs for breakfast. As I passed through the foyer, I caught sight of my reflection in the mirror hanging by the front door. I’d tried to avoid looking at my reflection in the bathroom, but it seemed that I couldn’t escape it.

The bruise was even worse than when I’d gone to bed. I ran back upstairs before anyone could see me. I needed to cover it up; I didn’t want Katie and Jesse to pay any extra attention to me because of it. In my room, I layered on the cover-up. I used as much as I could without it looking cakey.

When I was finished, it looked better, but the bruise was still visible. I hoped that they wouldn’t be able to tell that I’d put makeup on it. That would only make them more concerned.

By the time that I went back downstairs, everyone else was awake and eating breakfast. The all looked up at me as I walked in. Kurt looked terrible, his eyes were bloodshot and rimmed in dark black circles. His hair was dirty and greasy, sticking up in awkward directions. Jesse and Katie looked exhausted, and Jude looked just downright uncomfortable.

“Eggs are on the counter, Willow,” Katie said, finally breaking the silence.

After I made myself a plate of food, I walked back to the table. I neglected the empty seat next to Kurt for the one next to Jude. Unfortunately, this put me directly across the table from Kurt. His behavior from the day before was still fresh in my memory, and my throbbing eye wouldn’t let me forget. I didn’t want him to snap and hit me again.

“I see how things are now,” Kurt sneered at me. “Your new family’s better than your drug addict brother and dead parents? You’d rather sit with those stuck up, rich, snobs than me, your own flesh and blood brother.” His accusing words were sharp and biting, puncturing little holes in my heart.

“That’s not true Kurt,” I said softly, eyeing my plate. I wasn’t hungry anymore.

Kurt scoffed and rolled his eyes. “Yeah right Willow. You haven’t been here a week and you’ve already fallen into their trap. You’re blinded by their money and good looks. You don’t see them for what they really are. You don’t see the monsters they are inside.” He was crazy. Downright insane. That was the only way to describe his behavior. His eyes were wide and glaring accusingly at me. “Just look at them Willow! Open your eyes! They’re monsters! Fucking monsters!” he practically screamed. He’d jumped out of his chair and flung his plate off of the table, sending it crashing to the floor.

“You’re wrong,” I said firmly, ignoring Katie and Jesse’s wide-eyed looks and Jude purposely staring anywhere but at Kurt and I. “You’re the monster, Kurt. Jesse and Katie have been nothing but kind to you and this is how you repay them? By insulting them and destroying their things? What kind of man does that? What kind of man hits his little sister? You’re not a man Kurt, you’re a filthy coward.” I was surprised by the ferocity of my statements, and I immediately felt bad for what I’d said. But I knew that Kurt needed to hear truth, and I didn’t regret sticking up for the Sullivans.

To my surprise, Kurt didn’t have a response. He mutely sat back down at the table, put his head in his hands, and started to cry.

I turned to look at the Sullivans, who were all staring at me, wide-eyed. I guessed that none of them had expected me to stick up for myself like that. I felt myself blush under their scrutiny. Jude gave me a brief half smile before glancing quickly at Kurt, still crying, and returning his face back to an emotionless slate. I wasn’t sure what to make of his gesture, or of the sudden burst of confidence I’d just received.

Finally, Jesse spoke up. “I think we should get going. We can clean up when we get back.”

Katie nodded in agreement, and we stood up in unison. I walked hesitantly over to Kurt, and leaned down next to him, so that I was at eye level. “Kurt, it’s time to go,” I said tentatively, yet softly while gently pulling his arms away from his face.

He looked up at me, no longer angry. He looked desperate and forlorn. He slowly reached his arm out and softly brushed his fingers over my injured eye. “Did I do that to you?” he asked, tracing lightly over my bruise.

I nodded and he lowered his arm. “Oh my God. You’re right Willow, I’m a monster. Just look at what I did to you. And all those things I said to Mom and Dad before they died. What’s wrong with me?” he looked disgusted with himself, and I felt bad for him and for what I’d said.

“Come with me Kurt. We’re going to get you help, just come with me,” I said softly, holding my hand out to him.

He hesitantly took my hand, and we followed the Sullivans out to the car.