Everyone Has Issues! Right?
What Have You Been Doing Lately?
*KAT*
“Oh he looks cuter than he did last year” I said pointing at Jared McGee. Jake and I were still hanging by my car.
“Well Kat I can’t comment to that since I don’t judge how cute boys are every year…” He seemed down and I’m mad because I don’t see any reason for him to be.
“So we should walk inside” I said glancing down at my watch. “We have about 10 minutes till the bell rings.” I opened up my back door and pulled my bag over my shoulder. He looked at me for a bit then down at his watch.
“Yeah I guess we should.”
Walking into high school on the first day is always amusing, at least to me and Jake it is. The way everyone is out to impress in hopes of moving up the social ladder. Let’s face it me and Jake never had to worry about bullies, in fact we always just have kind of been liked by everyone, and I think that comes from the sheer fact that we never cared if we were liked. But as we stood at the top of the stairs, looking down at everyone standing in the commons area chatting it up as much as they could before the bell rang, we saw it all, the freshmen thinking they are the coolest thing ever cause they are finally in high school, the sophomores sitting around laughing at the freshmen wondering how they ever could have ever acted like them, the juniors excited with the knowledge that they only have two more years, and seniors ,which me and Jake are a part of this year, trying to figure out where the last 12 years of their life went.
Graduating at the end of this year was not a happy moment for me, I feared being thrown out into the world, most of all I feared that I wasn’t ready, that I would sink and be just like every other person who failed and ended up flipping burgers…
I didn’t want to disappear in the large group of high school graduates who weren’t able to make a life for themselves, I wanted to fly, to succeed, I want to go to collage, and I want to be a doctor. I know wanting to be a doctor sounds kind of cliché, but its true I love helping people, I love being needed, and most of all I want to rub it in my moms face. She was always telling me that when she graduated she went off to collage and was on her way to becoming a nurse, but then something happened, she got pregnant. She was always telling me it’s the family curse, not a single female member of my family has ever been able to complete collage, and according to her I might as well give up now because I’m doomed to fail.
Jake and I made our way down the stairs and sat across each other at the only empty table. I was looking at him but he was looking down at his hands. We had hung out so much over the summer alone together and he was never like this, in fact he was all smiles in laughs, but as soon as we get around people he goes into this sort of shut down mode. I stick my hand on top of his; I can see the huge difference in my tiny hands and his much bigger ones. He looks up at me with that face the ‘I’m thinking something over in my head and I just can’t find a solution’ face. I know that face well because he’s been making it a lot recently. And to be honest I’m worried. He’s exposed to be the strong, always sure of himself, rock for me to hold on to so I don’t fall apart. What happens if my rock crumbles?
“Oh he looks cuter than he did last year” I said pointing at Jared McGee. Jake and I were still hanging by my car.
“Well Kat I can’t comment to that since I don’t judge how cute boys are every year…” He seemed down and I’m mad because I don’t see any reason for him to be.
“So we should walk inside” I said glancing down at my watch. “We have about 10 minutes till the bell rings.” I opened up my back door and pulled my bag over my shoulder. He looked at me for a bit then down at his watch.
“Yeah I guess we should.”
Walking into high school on the first day is always amusing, at least to me and Jake it is. The way everyone is out to impress in hopes of moving up the social ladder. Let’s face it me and Jake never had to worry about bullies, in fact we always just have kind of been liked by everyone, and I think that comes from the sheer fact that we never cared if we were liked. But as we stood at the top of the stairs, looking down at everyone standing in the commons area chatting it up as much as they could before the bell rang, we saw it all, the freshmen thinking they are the coolest thing ever cause they are finally in high school, the sophomores sitting around laughing at the freshmen wondering how they ever could have ever acted like them, the juniors excited with the knowledge that they only have two more years, and seniors ,which me and Jake are a part of this year, trying to figure out where the last 12 years of their life went.
Graduating at the end of this year was not a happy moment for me, I feared being thrown out into the world, most of all I feared that I wasn’t ready, that I would sink and be just like every other person who failed and ended up flipping burgers…
I didn’t want to disappear in the large group of high school graduates who weren’t able to make a life for themselves, I wanted to fly, to succeed, I want to go to collage, and I want to be a doctor. I know wanting to be a doctor sounds kind of cliché, but its true I love helping people, I love being needed, and most of all I want to rub it in my moms face. She was always telling me that when she graduated she went off to collage and was on her way to becoming a nurse, but then something happened, she got pregnant. She was always telling me it’s the family curse, not a single female member of my family has ever been able to complete collage, and according to her I might as well give up now because I’m doomed to fail.
Jake and I made our way down the stairs and sat across each other at the only empty table. I was looking at him but he was looking down at his hands. We had hung out so much over the summer alone together and he was never like this, in fact he was all smiles in laughs, but as soon as we get around people he goes into this sort of shut down mode. I stick my hand on top of his; I can see the huge difference in my tiny hands and his much bigger ones. He looks up at me with that face the ‘I’m thinking something over in my head and I just can’t find a solution’ face. I know that face well because he’s been making it a lot recently. And to be honest I’m worried. He’s exposed to be the strong, always sure of himself, rock for me to hold on to so I don’t fall apart. What happens if my rock crumbles?
♠ ♠ ♠
Sidnee was on vacation when i wrote this one, so lets just say it was alot worse but luckly when Super Sidnee came back she sat down and calmed me down then somehow fixed the mess of a chapter i had writen.! :D thanks Super sidnee.!