Out of Focus

The door bells rings. "Hey Bells can you get that?? It's probably Becca. She's always early." Justin's mom had just dropped off the food so I was setting it up. She had left for the wedding. As I walked to the door I got nervous. Which is unlike me. 

One. Two. Three. Open. 
"Hey! You must be Isabella right?" "Yeah. Rebecca?" "Yes! And from what I know I think you and I are going to get along really well." 
As she says this I take my chance to check her over. About my height with wavy long hair quite like mine except her hair was completely blond with a purple streak running down her left side. She had a fair complextion & big bright blue eyes. So young looking that if it wasn't for her slightly curvy build she would have looked like a porcealin doll. She was dressed in jeans a long black t-shirt with a grey cardigan & black boots with purple knee socks. 
As I looked at her I had to wonder: Why would Justin choose me?" Maybe he hadn't.

Rebecca

Why am I always early? I mean really Becca? Just walk to the door. It's just some girl. I'm sure she isn't like really cute. Justin would have said something right? To her. Or Kaden. And if Kaden surely he would say something to me. Of course then there's the guy code. Ugghhhh.

So I knock on the door. I can hear Justin. Probably in the kitchen. Maybe yelling at what's her name. Oh yeah Isabella. What a name.
 
Footsteps. Okay. One. Two. Three. Open.
"Hey! You must be Isabella right?" I say. "Yeah. Rebecca?" "Yes! And from what I know I think you and I are going to get along really well." Sugar sweet. 
As she talks I take my chance to check her over. About my height with wavy long hair quite like mine except her hair is dark brown with black through it. She had a fair complextion & big bright almost green blue eyes. Not quite hazel. But beautiful. So mature looking with her slightly curvy build she could have almost looked like a porcealin doll. She was dressed in jeans a grey t-shirt with a big black lacy rose on it with a black loose vest & black boots.  
As I looked at her I had to wonder: Why would Justin choose me?" Maybe he hadn't. 

Isabella

"Come on in." As she follows me into the kitchen I can feel her assessing me as I had done to her. 
"Becca!" "Hey Justin!" She hugs him. Then the doorbell rings again & Justin breaks away from the hug. With a disappointed Becca next to him. Kaden. 
Justin comes back into the kitchen with Kaden. He looks so good. His dark wavy hair & piercing hazel eyes. More grey than blue. His tall frame dressed in jeans & a grey t-shirt tight on his muscular chest. 
Justin starts to make the introductions. "Bells this is Kaden. Kaden this is Bell-" "Isabella?!" Kaden says in disbelief. 
"Guilty as charged." I give a small smile. Almost a grimace.

"How do you two know eachother?" He looks so confused I should have told him the truth earlier. When Kaden doesn't answer I speak up, "He use to live in California. We were neighbors." I pause, "Best friends actually." 
"Oh come on Bell. We were more than that. We grew up together." he pauses, "&  we may have been best friends all our lives but we dated for a long time."
Shock covers Justin's face. "You...you dated." It comes out as a statement but I answer him anyway. "Yeah. For um about two years." "Two. Years." "Yeah." 
Then Becca saves the day. "Come on. Let's just forget it. So what they dated. History." She tugs on Justin's arm & takes his hand. "Come on. I want to see those new pictures of me." 

As they walk down the stairs I stand in the kitchen for a moment. Awkward tension. I grab my camera off the bar & follow them down. 

"Okay. Here they are." "Oh wow." I come up next to Justin standing at his left with Becca on the other side of him. 
The pictures of Becca are pretty. I admit. Her blond hair cascading down her shoulders. On a tire swing at a park with a beach behind her. A little, & I mean little, black & saphire dress that cinches at the waist. The top part cut in a scoop neck & saphire blue with the bottom half black. Beautiful.     
 "We had so much fun on that trip. We need to go next year too." she turns toward me & with a Ginger sweet smile says, "Maybe Bell can go too." justin smiles, "That'd be great Bells! You see we actually drove to California for our trip. That's where I was when you got here. I actually offered to take you here but my mom said it'd be better if you just transitioned here. From where ever you'd been. Soooo here we are. But anyway we went to Sweet Beach. Do you know the place?"
I did know the place. To well. I'd only been there once. With an ex. "Yeah I do actually." "Kaden new it too." he says slowly. "Yeah. Um that's where he kinda broke up with me before he moved." "Well sorry." says Kaden behind me. I hadn't seen him come in. "I hadn't seen you in what six months? I didn't actually get to tell you I was leaving. It's not my fault you tried to-" 
I cut him off & with venom in my voice say, "Actually it kind of is. I told you what was happening. I trusted you.You. You of all people. I thought you would tell for me. Instead you chose to not believe me. You took his side." I watch his face as it goes ash white. As Justin comes up to my right side understanding fills his face. Becca comes to stand between Kaden & I facing all of us, a look of confusion upon her doll like face. 
"You new?! I can't believe you! How- how- how could you? How could you do that to anyone?" "I-I--" "Especially Bella." "Oh come on! How was I suppose to know she wasn't lying? How was I suppose to know that she was really was in that situation & lying to get help because she was suicidal? How-" 
Now it's my turn to turn ash white. 

Justin cuts off Kaden who has a beet red face from yelling & says to me, "Suicidal? You. You really. Oh my god. Three times? Three fucking times? Bells. Why didn't you get help?" "I didn't want to get better. Not until...until now. I like living here. I just hope I like school half as much."

Then Rebecca really does decide to save the day. She says, "You will. Justin told us on the way down you love photography. We have a photography club. It's amazing. There's a few other kids besides me & Justin. And if you're good they'll love you." as she puts her arm over my shoulders. 
"She is good." "No Kaden. Bells is amazing." Justin smiles.

With all the tension gone thanks to Becca we head upstairs. Maybe we will be friends. 

***

Justin

She tried to kill herself? Why? Why not get better? I suppose I understand the second. But why the first? Why the third? Why get better now?

"Justin? Yoo-hoo! Haha come on. Help me get the drinks." I follow Becca into the kitchen. 
"I didnt think I'd like her at first but, I like her a lot. She's nice. Troubled. But nice." "I know. She grows on you." "So...do you like her?" "Yeah. I guess." 
I see Rebecca's look of frustration. "Hey. If you don't want me to date her I won't. Ever. Plus. I can't do that to Kaden." "He loves her. I think. To an extent. He just feels bad. Plus I think she still likes him."
I liked Bella a lot but I couldn't do that to my friends. And I thought Bella would understand because of Kaden.
"Yeah. I guess so."

Isabella

I didn't want Justin to know. Not yet. But Kaden must have known on the way back who I was. So he's been lying for four days at least. So Justin's gotta forgive me for just today right?      
"Bella? It's about 11:25 you wanna go change? We can go in the hot tub & the swimming pool."
"Kaden are you nuts? It's freezing out plus I fell today in ice. Not fun! Oh who am I kidding? Of course your're crazy."
Justin walks into the room laughing his ass off. 

"First, it's a heated pool. They're both inside. I guess my mom didn't tell you. Second, Bells are you really scared of swimming after today? You don't need to be. You have three people here who will help you."
"Wait what about today?" asks Rebecca. "Um we went to Lemon Lake & I kinda fell in." "Oh my god. Thank god your okay." "You didn't take her to the hospital?! She could be really sick! She's not use to these temperatures!" "Dude she didn't need the hospital. She's in one piece." "One piece!"
"Kade really she's fine. She isn't sniffling. I'm sure Justin got her in a warm bath & made her drink something warm. I'm sure she's fine." "Fine?" "Positive." 
After standing here all that time watching them fight it was clear. Rebecca loved to take whatever side Justin was on. Kaden liked me & Rebecca. Justin was caught in the middle. He likes me as he made clear earlier & I saw that he liked Rebecca somewhat too. What once must have been a love triangle had become a square.

Rebecca

I've liked Kaden for a really long time.  And I fooled around with Justin too. I can't hurt Kaden. I--I think I love him. I love Justin too. But not like Kaden. I ache for Kaden. But he aches for Bella. I wonder if I "date" Justin if he'll ache for me. I know he likes me. He told me. But is that forgotten?

As I walk to the pool I hear a voice behind me. 
"Hey Becs." "Hey Kade. Umm so I guess it's great seeing Bella huh?" "Amazing." he pauses taking a good look at me & says, "You know this doesn't change things right? I'm still going to talk to Justin. It'll be fine. We'll work this out. Promise."
"Promise? Can you make that promise? Especially after spending more time with her?" "Promise." he says & leans over to kiss my check. I smile & turn putting my towline down on one of the chairs & lowering into the big hot tub. 

Just as Kaden lowers himself in on my right side we hear the huge tv turn on. "Hey guys." "Hey." Justin comes in with his royal blue swim trunks on. Bella with an awesome bikini. I wish I had her body. I was envious. A black & royal blue zebra stripped halter & black bottoms. Adorable. I felt plain next to her. Even though I showed more skin. She looked sexier than I did. Unfair. But what was I to do but befriend my new enemy? 
Then just as she got in across from me with the help of Justin I saw the long scar on her left arm & the long scar on her right thigh. 
My, my, my, we have many secrets don't we? To bad Justin doesn't like messed up girls.

Isabella

I really don't like the way Becca is looking at me.
"So Bella what's the scar from?" Rebecca had seen at least one of them & Justin too because at that moment he caught my arm. He drug me towards him. "Oh Bells." There was pain in his voice. I hated that. I really hated that. 
I bit my lip. I glanced at Kaden who showed no emotion. He'd seen these before. I'd shown them to him & he had left. Then I glanced at Becca. The look she gave me. God it was filled with pitty & almost had a smug look as she looked at Justin. 
I looked at Justin at then down into my lap as I said, "They're from when I tried to kill myself the second time. I hate them."
What stopped us all from this depressing conversation was the man on tv. "Five minutes til midnight. The beginning of a new year."
"Lets make some resolutions guys." "Ugh the faithful Libby vows. Really? She's not even here." "She's been doing em since college & if we all wanna go to the art institute this is something we need to do so we're together. All of us." Justin says as he squeezes my hand. 
"Hey you mean how our moms use to go to the hot tub on Bell street & make they're list of dreams every new years." "Yeah." "We do that every year too!" "No way!" "Yeah!" "But I didn't know that was the street name." he smirks. "Yeah. It's how I got my name. The year they graduated they met up & boom my mom had me. But," I smirk, "If I remember correctly you got your name from a street too." "Oh come on-" "Justine street. Only you weren't a girl." 
Becca & Kaden roar in laughter & Justin gives me a dirty glare & sticks his tounge out. 
"Okay anyway. Becca you start. What's your wish for the new year?" 
I watch as Justin hands us each a lit candle.
"I wish that I find true love. No matter how hard it is. No matter what I have to go through."
She blows her green candle out. 
Kaden goes next. "That's always your wish Bec. Anyway, I wish that I have all A's so I can graduate next year with a perfect GPA."
Kaden blows his yellow candle out. 
Justin goes next. "Perfect GPA? As if it isn't all ready?" he pauses & gets a thoughtful look on his face, "Anyloo...I wish that my life will have unexpected twist & turns, I need a little danger in my life." he smiles. 
Justin blows out his turquoise candle. 
Next up: me. 
"Danger? You don't need danger." I smile, "Anywho...I wish like Justin that my life will have unexpected twists & turns like always, except I want everything to turn out perfect in the end." 
I blow out my purple candle. 
"Okay! Pour the champagne!!"
Alright people! 10, 9, 8, 7, 6...
"5, 4, 3, 2, 1!! Happy New Year!!" 
"So who's gonna me my new years kiss?" asks Becca. She close her eyes & both Kaden & Justin kiss her on the cheek. "Ha ok and what about Bella's?" I give her a look as she pauses, "Come on it's tradition!!" "Well..." they both say at he same time. I shrink back but they both manage to get me on either cheek. "Aggghhh!!" I yell. 
"Come on let's swim!!" Justin and kaden jump out. While me & Rebecca take a few seconds to adjust our suits. 
I hadn't really seen what Becca had on earlier because she was already in the hot tub but I did now. I felt horrible next to her. With her skinny body she pulled off her bikini just right. It was a wild cheetah print in yellow, black, & turquoise colors.  The top was a shell type halter & the bottoms were black. I felt plain. I'm sure the guys liked hers better. Unfair. 

Kaden & Becca jumped right in to the pool. Justin turned up the music to full blast. We were listening to Love Drunk. 
As he was about to jump in he sees my hesitation. "Aww come on Bells. I'm right here." I bite my lip. "Bells. Nothing will happen. No ice. You don't even have to jump. Or you can. We can. Just take my hand." he stretches his arm out & I take his hand & he smiles. We watch Kaden & Becca swim to the other end as he says, "Come on. 1,2,3!!"
We jump making a huge splash. I come up laughing & choke. "Bella! Are you okay?" He swims over & I nod. Then he shakes his hair out & I laugh as he grins. 
I take the chance to wrap my arms around him & dunk him under. He wriggles away & then because of the darkness in the room & the pool lights I can't find him.
"Shit! Guys where'd he go?!" We all laugh as we circle around to find him. Then erie silence as we wait. Only the splishing sound of the water. Because of how we'd jumped I was at the opposite end of the pool from Kade & Becca. So I scream as I hear the splash & Justin drags me under. 

Justin

As I drag Isabella under I hear her scream. I drag her close by her waist. Twisting in the water as she struggles against my grip. She gives in, smiling. As I look into her eyes, even greener than usual. Sparkling against the blue of the water. I wonder, How am I suppose to let her go? I can't hurt Kaden & Rebecca but I won't hurt Isabella. It's not a choice.

Isabella

"Bye guys." "Bye Bell. It was good to see you again. See you at school." Kaden waves as he walks out the door, "Bye Justin. Becca." Here I notice he smiles. "Bye Kade." Becca turns to me. "It was great meeting you Isabella." she hugs me. "It was great meeting you too. See you at school." "Kay." she smiles, "Bye Justin." "Bye."
Justin locks the door. "Ahh." he sighs, "Two a.m. They are exhausting." "Sure are. So," I say as I walk to the kitchen. "Whats the history with you & Becca & Kaden & Becca?" 
"Oh you uh noticed. Well, I'm not sure about them. I think they've fooled around. I don't know. And as for me & Becca. We are over." "I don't think she realizes that. She hates me." "No she doesn't. And what about Kaden? Does he know that you two are over? I can't do that to my friends Bells." he bites his lip, "God knows I want to. But I can't."
I bite my lip & turn away, fear of love & tears forming in my eyes. "You mean you won't. And your right because I can't either. Kaden loves Rebecca. I won't ruin that for him. And I won't ruin what she feels for the two of you." I walk out of the kitchen. "Bells-" his voice filled with pain echos up the stairs. 
He doesn't say anymore. He doesn't need to. Then all is calm. But it's always calm before a storm. Isn't it?