Finding Myself

I sat there waiting for the guy to come in. I was stunned to see Matt Jacobson walk in. I didn't see him at the party last night, either that or I was totally wasted . . .

I tried to smile and talk but a lame squeal of a hey came out instead.

"Hi," He stood there awkwardly.

"Sit?" I felt like an idiot trying to compose myself. "Sorry, I'm still kind of not me right now," I said through tears again.

He sat down where my mother was previously sitting. He sat uncomfortably on the edge of the seat.

"I can't understand what you're going through" he said. "I'm sorry," a small look of pain for me swept across his face.

"Yeah, thanks," was all I could reply.

"I, uh, I'll leave if you want. If you want to process this all. I'll get out of the way," He said.

It wasn't until then that I realized his light piercing hazel eyes. They were beautiful . . .

"Jacey?"

"Yes? No stay please. I mean, thanks for staying, and last night, and caring about me," I smiled normally for the first time today.

I just lay in bed looking at his features his lips, his eyes, his olive tanned skin. He was looking towards the rising horizon. His black hair glistening in the morning light. I looked to where he was looking too and saw birds going from here and there. He looked statuesque sitting there with a thoughtful expression plastered on his facial features.

"Did those hurt?" I asked looking at his snakebites, trying to break the awkwardness that only I felt.

"No, well not for me anyways," he smiled.

What am I doing checking out this guy? Was I not just in misery a few minutes ago? I was wondering in my head what I'd ask him. What did David do to me? No, that would be way beyond awkward. I was stumped

"Jacey, right? I'll come check on you later, I should really get home..." he said.

"Oh Yeah Sure," I smiled, understanding. "See you later then?" I smiled weakly. There was something about him that made me wish he'd stay longer...