Baby, We'll Fade Away

After we all ate at Panera Bread, we said our goodbyes and made our ways back to all of our buses. Kennedy, Jared, John, pat, and I all hopped onto our bus and immediately headed for the back lounge to play some video games.

"I call the new controller!" Kennedy yelled, making his way into the back room first. Sitting down in front of the television and game system, the guitarist snatched up the newest Xbox controller, earning multiple groans from the rest of us.

John, Jared, and I grabbed the other three controllers before seating ourselves on the floor. Kennedy turned on the game and put it on four-player. After everyone had chosen their character in Halo, I looked around the room, letting my eyes wander for a moment as I waited for the videogame to load.

Pat was standing in the doorway that lead to the bunks, hisbeautiful eyes downcast and his arms crossed over his skinny torso. "I'm going to bed," he mumbled, though I doubt anyone besides me heard him. Without another word, the lanky drummer turned on his heel and walked away.

Shrugging off his weird behavior and just thinking he was tired from the set earlier, I turned my blue eyes back to the game, which was just starting.

~

The next day, we had another early-ish set. We were supposed to go on at two-o-clock in the afternoon; we were playing at another indoor venue. The rest of the guys had already left about ten minutes before, but I was just now leaving our bus; I had searched and searched to find my beloved Ray Bans and refused to leave the bus until I had them.

Slipping my sunglasses over my eyes, I jumped off the bus, closed the door, and made my way to the back entrance. After flashing my pass to the security guard and getting a nod in return, I made my way inside the building. Walking down a hallway lined with dressing room doors, I saw Alex Gaskarth and Jack Barakat deep in conversation. They must not have noticed me presence about four yards away, because they kept talking in hushed whispers. I could only make out a few of the words that were being said.

"No way!.. he did?.. what if?.. are you sure?" Jack Barakat was saying, his dark eyes slightly wide. The only response I saw from Alex was a nod of the head and a few hushed words that I didn't catch.

Feeling now was a good time to make my presence known, I strode forward. "Hey, guys. What's up?" Trying to play it off, I pretended I hadn't been listening in on their conversation a few seconds prior.

Both of them awkwardly nodded their heads in greeting. Jack opened his mouth to say something, but was cut off when Alex elbowed him in the ribs and sent him a death glare. Jack nodded and looked at the floor - he looked almost guilty.

I shrugged that off, too. "Uh, we gotta go.. get ready. Yeah. Bye, Garrett," Alex said quickly, before dragging Jack off with him.

Knitting my eyebrows in confusion, I said, "Bye, Alex, Jack," before continuing to walk down the hallway. I passed another group of people - two girls and two guys that I didn't recognize. Probably merch bitches, shirking their duties. They didn't speak to me as I passed, though they all stared. One of the girls even pointed to me before murmuring something to the other girl.

Jeez, people are acting weird today, I thought to myself. Is it me? I'm wearing pants, right? Looking down at myself to make sure, I took note that I was, indeed, fully clothed.

Huh. Well, maybe there's something on my face? Before I could go off in search of a mirror to fix whatever was wrong with my face, i spotted Kennedy talking to John Ohh. Jared and Pat were standing with them too, but the ginger and brunette had their eyes glued to the floor and their hands in their pockets. Neither of the two were speaking.

I walked over to the group of four, standing between Jared and Pat. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Pat shuffle a few inches away from me. I sighed, turning to look back at the other three.

Kennedy and John had stopped talking and were staring at me intently.

"Hey, guys..?" I asked more than said, raising an eyebrow at everyone's strange behavior.

It was quiet for a moment; none of us spoke. Jared and Pat were now staring at me, too. Pat's gaze was unreadable, again - Jared's looked like it held.. pity?

As I was about to speak, a different long-haired drummer walked up to our group and stood beside me. A happy smile was planted on Nate's face, and even though he seemed slightly nervous, he was the most normal person I had encountered all day. "Hey, wassup?" he greeted everyone, earning a small round of "good"'s and "fine"'s. Then, he turned to me, shoving his hands into the front pockets of his black skinny jeans. "Hey, Garrett.. uh, can I talk to you for a sec?"

When I nodded, Nate grasped my arm and dragged me off, down a different hallway. Letting go of my arm, he asked quietly, "Is it true.. is it true that you're gay?" His face was slightly hopeful, but it held mostly curiosity.

I wanted to faint right then and there. That was why everyone had been weird around me. That was why people stopped talking whenever I came around.

My secret had gotten out somehow. And I had absolutely no idea how.