These Magic Moments

I was once again going weeks without seeing J.R. Celski, as he had to head out to Colorado for physical therapy on his leg. Apolo, however, was set to join him just a week later and was bringing me along. I had given him my phone number the night we had kissed, so my empty text message inbox and lack of voicemails always depressed me. He hadn't given me his number either, so I was awaiting a "Hey, it's JR" text as well.

Nothing arrived. Nothing at all. No texts, no phone calls, no letters. Even Apolo hadn't received any word from J.R. Celski. We didn't know whether to be offended or concerned. In all, we didn't know what to make of it.

The next week, we made it up to Colorado, still unsure of whether we were going to shun J.R. or not. However, as soon as Apolo and I made it onto the Olympic training facility ice we knew we would not be talking to J.R. at all or anytime soon, as he shoved his tongue down Raechel Flatt's throat.

~ ! ~

Raechel was a petite, perfect little figure skater who was America's best chance for a medal. I didn't hate her until that day. Until that day, I actually thought she was a nice, sweet girl. Until that day, I thought she was innocent.

I was wrong.

I wanted to hurl as I watched them kiss. Apolo stood there with his mouth agape, waiting for J.R. to realize that he had an audience. I didn't know why, but tears were forming in my eyes. He had kissed me and now he was kissing Raechel Flatt with the same lips that had touched mine, the same tongue that had caressed mine, and the same, slow movement that had entranced me. He obviously played game and had it down, near perfect.

Apolo and I just stood there, watching him as he pulled her in close, neither of us knowing what to do or say. I then slung Apolo's bag over my shoulder, coughed, and walked away, just in time to hear J.R. loudly yell, "Shit."

Apolo followed soon after me, and when we were both outside, pulled me into him for a hug. I hugged him back, blinking the tears back into my eyes. I was not going to cry over J.R. Celski, he wasn't worth it if he kissed me and ran away, obviously not feeling anything for me. All his feelings were being shoved towards a new girl, all his feelings were being shoved into Raechel Flatt's mouth.

J.R. Celski was an excellent game player, I had found that out. I just decided that I was going to surrender and no longer play. I was no longer going to be a piece complicated puzzle. I was out.

~ ! ~

Apolo Anton Ohno once again proved to be an amazing cousin as he dropped our stuff off at his apartment, leaving me in the car. After that, he drove around until he found what he was looking for and when he did, a smile planted itself on his face.

I hadn't paid attention to where he was driving, so when I looked up, a small smile played its way onto my face. He had driven me to an IHOP, something he was quite proud about finding. I looked over at him, the grin setting myself on its face. "This is so perfect, Apolo, thank you so much. It's exactly what I needed."

"I assumed, knowing you like I do," he shot me a smile. "You're the best little sister slash cousin, ever, Lilly, and if J.R. doesn't see how awesome you are, he doesn't deserve you."

My smile faltered, but just for a second, until I said. "Well Chunky, let's go eat."

My cousin laughed at me. "I'll be having a water with a side of your fruit cup from your kid's meal."

Now it was my turn to laugh, "You have yourself a deal."

~ ! ~

The next day was awkward, because as Apolo and I entered the rink, J.R. was leaving. He looked at me with a longing gaze and opened his mouth to speak, but I didn't hear any words form. His jaw moved up and down, the occasional noise coming out of his mouth, but never any words.

He looked tired, he looked terrible, and he looked anxious. I stood there in front of him, curious as to what he would say to me in an attempt to make it better. Nothing came out of his mouth, so I shrugged him off, following Apolo onto the ice. Then, I heard it, what I needed him to say. "I'm sorry, for everything."

Then, I didn't let him explain. Then, I just continued walking. Then, I walked away from J.R. Celski, all he could bring me, and I smiled. I didn't need him in my life. J.R. Celski was drama on top of drama, and let's add in more drama.

He wasn't a necessity. I didn't need him at all.

You know what's a real shame? I knew I did need him. I needed J.R. Celski. More than you can imagine.