Say the Last Goodbye

Brian held it together the entire drive. He just sat still as i pulled into the parking lot of the apartments. He didn't move as i shut off my truck though. I gave a sigh before grabbing the duffel bag and walking over to the passenger side.

My keys were the only noise besides the vehicles driving by. When i opened the passenger door. Brian looked defeated. "C'mon buddy." I whispered softly while grabbing his calloused hand.

He looked over at me and the look on his face just made me want to comfort him. Brian nodded slowly before sliding out of the truck. With his arm draped over my shoulders, we made our way to my apartment upstairs.

My hands were shaking at how close i was to his warm body. I swear i saw a slight smirk when i tried unlocking the door...i had never had another guy besides my brother in my apartment before...

Finally, the door swung open and i flicked my light on. My eyes burned from the bright light. I slipped off my heels and kept Brian leaning on me. once our shoes were gone, we made our way to the back bedroom.

"No couch?" Brian whispered.

"And no TV. I'm on a tight budget okay and the couch I used to have was falling apart."

A strained chuckle escaped his lips. Sympathy welled up in me but i quenched it right away. I knew that Brian wouldn't want sympathy right now...i knew because I had been in the same situation before.

I groaned when i saw boxes still taking up space in the back bedroom.

"Guess you're sleeping with me." I sighed heavily.

"I can sleep on the flo-" He started to say.

"No! I will not make you sleep on the floor." I glared at him.

He put a hand up in surrender. I sighed before bringing him to my room. I gave a happy grin when i saw that it was clean.

"Nice..." Brina trailed off.

"What? Don't you like my room?"

The decorations and paint were dark blood red and black. Perfect for the morning hangovers that rarely happen.

"It's so...dark." He commented.

"First off, I sleep better. Second, it's nice for the rare hangovers."

Brian nodded before eying up the stereo then the bed.

Yeah my stereo system was surround sound and cost me $200. That was when I had a high paying Job and money.

"Okay," I sighed before walking away from Brian to the bed, "You are taking a shower. I have Axe and all the guy stuff in the bathroom."

He raised an eyebrow at me.

"It's for when my brother needs a place to crash." I explained.

He nodded before walking over to his duffel bag which i set by my bed. I pointed to the bathroom which was practically seven feet from my bed. Brian gave me a strained smile before going into the small bathroom and shutting the door.

I got up to turn on my stereo. Breaking Benjamin played softly through the speakers.

"White walls surround us
No light will touch your face again
Rain taps on the window
As we sleep among the dead

Days go on forever
But I have not left your side
We can chase the dark together
If you go then so will I..." I sang the first lines of 'Anthem of the Angels.'

I walked out of the room to the kitchen to get a glass of water and shut off the light. Brian was still in the shower when i entered the room again. I decided to quick change into some Pj's.

Nothing matched but that was how I liked it. I smiled before crawling into my cold bed. I picked up one of my Nora Roberts book and tried to concentrate on my reading but it was pointless because my mind kept wandering back to Brian. Finally I heard the shower faucet squeak as it shut off.

A few minutes later the light clicked off and a fresh smelling Brian stepped out of the bathroom in Boxers and a muscle shirt. My heart sped up as i just glanced at him but i quickly averted my gave back to the words on the page of my book.

i smiled and patted the spot beside me on my king size.

"Jeez, your bed takes up most of the room in your room." Brian stated before climbing in next to me.

I set my book on the nightstand and looked at him. That's how i like it. You forgot to shut off the light." I whispered the last part.

Brian huffed before leaving the bed and turning off the room light. I flicked on my small bedside light a few seconds after Brian shut off the main light and almost screamed when i saw his face only inches from mine.

"Jerk." I mumbled before I forced the4 heat away from my cheeks...pointless mental action...

"Can I have some of your water?" He whispered.

I nodded before looking towards my stereo. Brian only took a few large swallows (-.-) before he nudged me over. I took one of the pillows with me before i moved to the colder side of the bed. I never slept over on this side.

Brian laid on his side and stared at me in the dim light. I slid my body farther beneath the covers but left my head and shoulders propped up on a pillow.

"Am I the first guy in your apartment?" Brian asked me.

I looked at him. "I let my brother crash here sometimes."

"Besides your brother."

"...Yeah..."

He gave a small grin. "I feel so special." He stated sarcastically.

"You should. You're going to be the first and the last."

"Does that mean I can come over and crash in your bed whenever?"

I stared at him. "I don't know." I answered after a small pause.

Before I knew it, Brian had me in his arms. He had his arms wrapped around my hips and his head rested on my breasts.

"Thank you for letting me stay here until I can get a different place and until I can sort everything out with Michelle." His voice sounding thick and hurting.

"It's going to be okay Brian." I whispered as I rested my hand on Brian's bicep.

Hot tears started to soak into my shirt. i whispered words of comfort as i soothingly ran my fingers through his hair. Brian's short gasps started to calm and the bitter and hurt tears lessened.

"Why are you so nice to me?" Brian whispered.

I was quiet for a few seconds, trying to collect my thoughts. "No matter how harsh you were to me during school, I've always liked you one way or another, Brian. I forgave you for what you used to do to me in school. I've changed and grown up."

"You've definitely changed." He stated.

"Exactly. Not only in appearance, by the way, but maybe you haven't noticed yet."

"I've noticed everything different about you."

Confusion swept through me. "Wait...you have?"

"Yeah. You got tattoos and your hair is curlier. You're eyes hold experience in pain, love, and anything else possible that I haven't experienced. You're movements are harsher yet can be graceful at times. You seem so much more confident and alert." Brian was looking at me with his bloodshot eyes now.

"How-" I was on the verge of tears before he cut me off.

"Katie, even if I never acted like it, I've always been aware of your presence and actions." He held me closer and tighter.

I couldn't look at him anymore.

"Katie...Look at me, please."

My bleary eyes locked with his.

"Who hurt you?" Brian whispered.

My body went cold and rigid subconsciously in his grasp. I couldn't answer him.