Lawn Boy

When I drove us all to school the next day, I couldn’t stop thinking of Asher. What did he think of me and Jamie hanging out? I didn’t want to make him jealous or anything. After all, it wasn’t a date—even though it did seem a lot like a date.
As always, Ashley and Jack went their separate ways from me. Ashley went to the cheerleaders’ table and Jack went to the jocks’ table. I joined my semi-friends that were really Shane and his friends. Though, I do have to say that Asher has become not only Shane’s friend, but mine too. Then again, I don’t really go around kissing my friends either. So what exactly is Asher to me?
When I saw him, he could barely look at me. I didn’t really want to look at me, too. I sat at their large table and started talking immediately with Lupe and Pete who seemed to be spending a lot of time together lately.
“So, what was up with you and Jamie Bly?” asked Lupe.
“What do you mean?” I asked.
“Well…” She batted her eyes and scooted closer to me. “There’s a rumor going around town that he’s bisexual.”
“I-I wouldn’t know,” I said.
“Come on. You want us to believe that you were just ‘hanging out’ with Jamie last night?” Pete asked.
“We were just hanging out,” I said. “It wasn’t a big deal.”
“Well, how did you meet?” asked Lupe.
“What is this—an interrogation?” I asked.
“We’re just curious.”
“Leave him alone,” said Asher.
“Ooh, listen to you Ash,” said Pete. “Someone’s got a little crush.”
“Shut the fuck up, Pete! I’ll kick your ass!”
Asher ran away from the table in anger.
“I’ll talk to him,” said Shane.
“No,” I said. “I’ll go.”
“So what’re you two like best buddies now?” asked Kelly
“Just leave it you guys, okay. What’s the big deal?” I asked before I left to go talk to Asher.
I found him in a corner where no one was around. He was sitting on the ground and practically in tears. I walked over to him cautiously and then sat next to him. She sniffled and then wiped his nose.
“Get away from me,” he said.
“I could,” I said. “But I’m not.”
“I just want to be alone,” he said.
“I know. I know that feeling, but trust me—that’s the last thing you need right now.” I paused and looked at him. “I just want you to know Asher that everything is going to be okay. It might not seem like that right now, but…it is.”
“I just don’t know what to do. I never thought that I would be going through this. What am I going to do when everyone finds out that I’ve got a crush on the new kid and the new kid is a guy.”
“Well, first of all, I didn’t know that I was still the new kid,” I said and he laughed. “Second of all, people don’t have to find out until you’re ready.”
“Why do you have to be so great?” he asked.
“Well, the fact that I’m great works for me, see?”
“What?”
“You wouldn’t like me if I wasn’t awesome and that would make my attending this school really boring and sucky.”
“Stop—stop doing that. This can’t happen. I can’t like you. This isn’t how my life is supposed to be.”
“How do you know? Life is whatever you make it, Ash. Just don’t let others make it miserable for you.”
“Thanks,” he said.
“It’s no problem,” I said.
“I really wanna kiss you,” he said.
“Maybe that’s not such a good idea here,” I said, “especially if you don’t want anyone to know.”
“There’s just something about you that makes me crazy…in a good way.”
I felt myself blush and knew my face was bright red. “I like you too, Ash.”
“Are you blushing?”
“So?”
“No, you’re cute when you blush.”
“Thanks for making me blush even more,” I said. It was true. I was blushing more now. I didn’t foresee myself stopping either. “Come on. Let’s go show those guys you’re okay.”
I stood up and gave Asher my hand and helped him up. We walked back to the table, but before anyone could say anything, the bell rang. I didn’t want to part from Asher, but I had to. And I went through my classes anticipating when I could go to English class and see him again. I was starting to really like him, too.
When he walked in, he smiled at me. He sat down and then started to talk before the other two students in our group came into the room.
“So, what were you doing with Jamie?” he asked.
I smiled. “Why are you jealous?” I asked.
“N-No,” he said shifting his eyes around.
I smiled back at him. “We were just hanging out,” I said.
“Oh,” he said. He paused and looked around. “How did you meet him?”
I smiled again. I couldn’t help it. “He’s our gardener,” I said.
“Why are you smiling?” he asked.
“You’re so cute when you’re jealous,” I said.
“Shh,” he said looking around. “Someone might hear.”
About a month ago, I was Asher. I didn’t want anyone to know about who I was and who I was attracted to. I would’ve never even thought about kissing another guy, let alone talking to one that I thought was cute. I’ve come so far since then and I was beginning to feel like it was time for me to come out.
“Sorry,” I said. “I forgot.”
Once the two other people from our table got there, our conversation hit a snag. But I did pass him a note asking if he wanted to hang out at my house after school. He passed it back with a yes.
I sat through Mr. Perkins’ lecture for a while, but sent Asher another note about ten minutes before class ended. I was actually debating whether I should give him the note, but of course I decided to do it. I was just really nervous. The note said, “Will you go out with me?” Then it had a check box for yes and a check box for no. It’s cheesy, I know, but I couldn’t think of anything else.
Anyway, I slid it over to his desk. He opened it and looked at it with shock. He looked around him to see if anyone was looking, and then he looked at me. He took his pen and then wrote on the note. But he wrote on it so that way I couldn’t see what he put. Also, whatever he wrote looked like more than a check in one of the boxes. When he was done, he folded it carefully and passed it back.
“Mr. Grant, is my class that boring that you have to pass notes to Mr. Train during my lecture?” asked Mr. Perkins. He started to walk over to our desks.
Asher’s face turned a ghostly white. I tried to grab the note and hide it, but Mr. Perkins came over and knew that I had it.
“Give me the note, Mr. Train,” he said to me. “I wanna read what so much more interesting than my lecture.”
“I’m sorry, but I can’t do that Mr. Perkins.”
“Max, give me the note,” he said. I shook my head. “Give me the note or you’ll be in after school detention for the rest of the week.”
I sighed, knowing that I couldn’t get detention or my mom would kill me. It was just as bad as getting suspended to her. I had to give him the note. Asher’s face turned bright red. He hid his face in his hands so no one would see. Mr. Perkins had read someone’s note last week and then read it to the entire class. I guess Asher was afraid that he would do that now.
Mr. Perkins read the note, looked at me and then to Asher. He smiled and then put the note back onto my desk. “Try to pay more attention in my class boys.”
“That’s not fair,” said Lila, the girl whose note he read last week. “You read my note to the class.”
“Yeah! What makes them so special?” asked Jake, one of those kids whose always looking for a cause to fight.
“Calm down you guys,” said Mr. Perkins. “It’s my class and I dictate how its run. Not you.”
It was safe to say that Asher and I weren’t the most popular kids in the class right now, but I was just relieved that he didn’t read the note out loud. I probably wouldn’t have cared if he did, but Asher does. So, in turn, that makes me care.
When class was over, Mr. Perkins asked us to stay after since it was the last class of the day. Asher and I waited until the rest of the class was gone. Then, we cautiously walked up to Mr. Perkins who was leaning against his desk.
“I asked you guys to stay after to let you know that this is the last time I want to catch you two passing notes in my class.”
“We understand, Mr. P,” I said.
“I normally read these notes out loud, but given the content of your note, I decided not to. I understand what it’s like to be young and gay and how important it is to keep that a secret until you’re ready.”
“Thanks,” said Asher.
“If either of you ever need to talk—I’m here.”
“Thanks,” I said.
“You two can go. Remember that your essays on your favorite poet are due tomorrow at the end of class.”
Asher and I left Mr. Perkins’ class and walked out of the school together. We reached my SUV and Ashley, Jack, and Shane were already waiting there.
“What took you so long?” asked Ashley.
“I was talking to my English teacher,” I said. I turned to Asher. “Where’s your car?”
“Um, just over there,” he said, pointing down the aisle. “Wanna follow me?”
“Yeah,” he said.
“Where are we going?” asked Jack.
“Home,” I said. “Asher’s coming to hang out for a while.”
“Oh,” said Jack.
“Asher, I’m gonna drop Shane off at his if that’s okay, so just follow us.”
“Hey, can’t I come over too?” Shane asked.
“No,” both Asher and I said in perfect harmony.
The three of them looked at us suspiciously. I knew I had to let Shane come over if everyone was gonna stop being so suspicious. Either that, or come up with a good excuse. I didn’t feel like thinking on my toes, so…
“Sure,” I said. “You can come over.”