Back to the Place We Knew Before

Chapter Eight
Raegan

Alex had been acting really strange over the past few months. He still acted like he cared about me, but not as much as he used to. He told me he loved me every morning when we woke up, and kissed me before he went on stage, but the twinkle in his eye had faded. It wasn’t only Alex’s feelings that were fading. I started feeling like Alex was less and less of a love interest, and more and more like a good friend whom I happened to make out with and engage in intercourse with occasionally.

“I know what’s going on,” Zack said, joining me as I watched Hocus Pocus in the back lounge.

“Oh? That’s cool. Wait for a commercial,” I said without peeling my eyes from the screen.

“Isn’t this a Halloween movie? It’s nearing Christmas, you know.”

“HUSH! It doesn’t matter, it’s my favourite so shut up!”

“You are so your sister.” he sighed. I knew he missed her. He still sulked around the bus, but he was getting better. …sort of. He was talking with me regularly, and with the guys occasionally. “Commercial, what’s up?”

“You aren’t in love with Alex anymore.”

“What? Why would you say that?” I knew it was true, but it sounded horrible when spoken out loud.

“It’s obvious, Rae. You kiss and hug and say ‘I love you’ just because it’s routine.”

“I guess you’re right.”

“I know I am. So what are you going to do about it?”

“Do you think I should end it? I don’t want to hurt him.”

“You won’t. He’s in the same position as you.” Surprisingly, his words didn’t hurt as much as they should have. I expected it. The heartbreak he’d been suffering had made him more obvious. He didn’t have anything to loose, anymore, so he did what he wanted.

“I don’t want to be the one to end it. Maybe you should tell him to.”

“Maybe you and him should just sit down and talk.”

“I guess you’re right.” I said, sighing. Soon, we heard the hustle and bustle of someone haphazardly making their way to the back lounge.

The door swung open and in fell Alex with Jess on top of him, connected at the lips, hands roaming all over.

“Alex! Hi.” I said, just looking down at him.

“Shit, Rae. I-I”

“Don’t even worry about it.” I said before walking away from them to find who I really needed to talk to. I pulled out my phone and dialed the number that was still memorized, despite the months with an absence of contact.

“Raegan?” I answered questioningly.

“Alex cheated on me. I-I need you.”

“Now? You didn’t need me when you were with Alex, but you need me now that you’ve been heartbroken?”

“No, Jack. I’ve always needed you. I just was afraid to admit it until now.”

He sighed. “Meet me at the Starbucks two blocks down. I’m on my way there now.” With that he hung up.

:::

“Java Chip Frap.” I told the cashier who looked bored out of his head.

“It’s below freezing outside, and you get a frozen coffee?” His voice was smooth as it found my ears from behind me. His breath caressed my bare neck and I turned around to see he was standing closer to me than I would have expected after so long without interaction.

“It’s my favourite.”

“I know.”

I grabbed my drink and we headed toward the area with two big comfy chairs seated next to each other, looking out a window. We watched the people passing with the hustle and bustle of Philadelphia.

“Why’d you do it?” he asked.

“Do what?”

“Why did you get with Alex? I told you that I loved you that day on the beach.”

“I was kind of bitter at you. I waited for two years for you to say that to me, and as soon as Alex started to show me attention, you tried to steal his thunder.”

“I was afraid, Raegan. I wanted nothing more than to be with you for probably longer than you wanted to be with me. I thought that if Alex got you, then we’d never get the chance to be. I was right, I guess.”

“Jack, let’s not do this now.”

“No. Let’s. Tell me, how did it feel when you found him with her? Did it hurt? Because that’s what you deserve, you know. You deserve to get hurt for once. Do you think that just because you’re beautiful you can just do whatever with whoever you want? You can’t just treat people like shit, and toy with their emotions.”

“I didn’t mean to toy with your emotions”

“I kissed you, and you kissed back! Then next thing I know, you’re in Boston, fucking my best friend.”

“Jack-”

“No. Just stop. I don’t think I can do this. I’m sorry.”

With that he got up and left. It was then when I realized just how alone I was in this world.