Broken Stars.

Every time he left, bad things would happen now. He'd leave and reality would fade and no longer would I escape to a white room, but into a dark one. Like in those horror movies where the rooms dimly lit in red. Everything bad happened there, and I'd try to cry out to Austin, but he couldn't hear me. He'd leave for school, and I'd scream and beg for him to stay, but he just left. And then it would go dark and a cloaked figure would do such unmentionable things to me. Things you really only thought could be in horror movies, but I felt it. I felt everything. If I where in a dream, this wouldn't hurt. So where the hell am I?

I begged each time for mercy, but the more I begged the more he'd hurt me. I stopped crying one day though, and just let it happen. No more screams escaped from my throat. I just sat there and prayed for Austin to come back. I needed him back there with me; he has no clue what goes on in this hell I'm in. But I know he makes the bad things go away. He always has. He's always been my silver lining, and he's the only thing I have to look forward too.

Why can't he save me though? I want this all to stop, I want him to take me home. I hate this place. I hate it. Why hasn't anyone else come to see me? They could help him, help him save me. He makes things so much better, but he doesn't know how much I need him to actually fix this mess I'm in.

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-Austin-

Three months of this, three months of evading every ones questions. Today the hospitals finally letting me take Shawn out. He can sit on his own still, so they're letting me push him in a wheel chair. I have the entire day with him, and I'm going to take him to every memorable place I can. I know it's a long shot, but I'm desperate to get Shawn back.

The first place we hit was home, I held my cologne underneath his nose to let him smell the scent he used to rant and rave about, but nothing happened. I took him to Catie's house since she was out helping Maren with some project with the rest of the guys, but nothing happened. I took him just about everywhere I could think of, until I finally thought of somewhere that Shawn hasn't been to in a long time, somewhere that he was denied going too.

"Hey baby." I whispered softly as I knelled down in the grass in front of him. "I know it's been a while, and I know you were trying to forget them, but I wanted to bring you here to your parents graves at least one last time."

We sat there quietly for what seemed like forever. Just sitting and staring. I held his limp hand in my own and read the engravings on the tombstones in front of me countless times.

"Why the fuck is he in a wheel chair?" My heart stopped and I carefully stood up and turned around.

"Uh.. Uh... How did you find us?" Catie stood before me with everyone else, her eyes filled with anger.

"How did I find you?! I was on my way home and I saw you two, now I'll say this nicely one more time," she paused and took a breath. "Why the fuck is my best friend in a fucking wheel chair?"

"Calm down Catie...."

"NO!" She screamed. "Why the hell isn't he saying anything?" I winced at the level of her voice. "I want some mother fucking answers right now Austin or so help me God."

"Shawn... Shawn had a break down, and basically he withdrew into himself, so now he's in what the doctors call a catatonic state." I saw her heart break into a million pieces right then and there. She leaned over to look at Shawn closely. Her eyes filled with tears and my heart broke then too. She never cries, never. And I'm the one who caused that, because I took her best friend away.

"Austin..." Her voice was uneven and her hands were clenched as she stood back up. I braced myself for the worst, knowing I deserved every bit of it for keeping them in the dark. "You are so lucky that boy loves you, because if I had any doubt in my mind that he didn't, I'd kick your ass here an-" We were all interrupted by a tiny grunt. All of our eyes darted over to the boy in the wheel chair.

"Keep going, keep going." I whispered to Catie.

"'nd now. You are so lucky Austin." She said, slowly raising her voice. We all stared at Shawn out of the corners of our eyes. "You know what, fuck you guys loving each other. I'm going to kick your a-"

"Stop" We all fell forwards and looked at Shawn. His eyes were darting around at all the faces in front of him. "Stop."

"Okay baby, okay. We won't fight." His little frame shook as he took huge shaky breaths in.

"Stop..." A relieved smile spread across his face and he clutched the air and looked down. "Stopped." He laughed and took huge gasping breaths of air in.

"We have to get him to the hospital." I said in a rush. Jaide pushed the chair as Catie and I followed next to him, we kept him with us by repeating the word 'stop' with him.

The hospital was maybe about fifteen minutes away, and I wont lie; Jaide booked it. Each minute was a chance we could lose him again. He just kept smiling and saying 'stop... it stopped!' He slowly threw in more words, but no more then three. He didn't answer any of our questions though. He was so focused on something stopping.

We pushed past everyone to get to Shawn's room, and I grabbed Doctor Wes as soon as I saw him standing by some other faceless person. I don't care what he was talking about, and neither did he I guess since he so willingly went with me.

I described what happened and he immediately stopped us and knelt down in front of Shawn.

"Shawn... Shawn?" Doctor Wes repeated.

"It stopped... It stopped!"

"Shawn focus on my face." We all watched carefully as Shawn's face sunk back into his emotionless expression.

"WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO?" Catie wailed, and Shawn blinked again smiling once more.

"Shawn, listen to me... You have to try to stay with me okay?" Shawn nodded and looked at all of us once more. "Alright I'm going to give you a shot okay?"

"Why?" My heart almost exploded when he answered.

"I just need to run some blood test and take some pictures okay?"

"No... No you're going to make Austin go." He clutched my hand. "If he leaves then they come. I don't want to go back." His body shook as he started to cry. "You can't let me go back. I need Austin here, he makes the go away."

"Okay okay, Austin can stay with you." His grip on my hand tightened as he looked up at me.

"You can't leave me, they hurt me when you leave." I nodded, trying to give him the most understanding and sincere look I could muster up. He smiled when his mind was convinced that I wasn't going anywhere.

"I'm sorry but I can't really allow anyone else." Doctor Wes said sheepishly. They all nodded, but before leaving Catie turned to both Shawn and I.

"If he doesn't come back as good as new, your ass is mine." She playfully winked at me, but scowled when she caught Shawn looking. I nodded in response, still in complete terror of what she might do if he doesn't come back spic and span.

"Well, lets go see what's going on shall we?" The doctor pushed Shawn down the hallway, and Shawn insisted that I keep talking. I really didn't have anything to say other then how much I missed him. He never took his eyes off of me though.

Five hours of mindless x-rays, scans, and blood tests. As long as I kept talking and Shawn could see me, he was happy. As soon as I had to step away, he'd scream a blood curdling scream. I'd calm him down again though by talking and quietly saying sweet nothings. I caught Doctor Wes smiling here and there, which made me laugh to myself. I need to invite him over for dinner sometime.

When the tests where finally over, we decided it would be best if we stayed at the hospital one more night. Shawn and I talked for hours out of his own accord. He didn't want to sleep until he knew it was safe.

I told him about how we only had one more month left of school, and that I talked it over with the principle, and he said Shawn...Or Danny could still graduate with full credits. By talk I mean I threaten him with a law suit. I told him all about what had happened with Shawn and why he had to be Danny, the law suit plays in because Shawn showed every sign of physical abuse by his uncle, and no one called for any sort of help for him.

Shawn was absolutely ecstatic about that, and couldn't wait to go back. Even if it was for less then a month.

Each time I could steal a quick kiss I would. Whether it be on the side of his head, or just a quick peck on the lips, I'd take it.

The night drew on and Shawn and I had Jaide bring us over some movies; we both kept each other awake, though he insisted that I sleep. I couldn't though, I haven't actually been able to talk to Shawn in three months. He was lost, but I found him again.

"So... What was it like?"

"Scary as hell, but then the strangest thing happened. I heard Catie screaming, and it broke. You made the terrors go away, but she...I guess you could say... woke me up."

"Doctor Wes said memories or familiar things could snap a person out of it."

"And I do love it when that Lil girl gets all worked up." He laughed and cuddled in closer to me.

"I don't, she scares the shit out of me."

"I know, that's my favorite part. She's a scrapper too, but don't worry. I won't let her hurt you... I think that's what woke me up."

"Her hurting me?"

"No...Not necessarily her." He said, pausing to think over his new discovery. "But just something hurting you. I wanted it to stop, and then the terrors went away and it stopped... I guess that all makes sense."

I nodded and lightly kissed the back of his hand. "You don't have to worry about any of that now okay? I'm sorry I had to leave all those times, you know I wouldn't have if I would have known what was going on."

"I know." He yawned and tightened his grip around me.

"I don't want you to put too much stress on your brain okay baby? So How's about you take little naps, and I'll wake you up every hour." He nodded this time and gave me the sweetest look ever. His eyes finally weren't the blank orbs they used to be. They had life, and they where filled with love.

I ran my fingers through his hair and hummed the song I used to sing to him. It's been so long since Shawn and I actually had a relationship now. I took advantage of what we had, but never again. This boy, is my soul mate, and I'll be damned if I ever lose him again.