Broken Stars.

I fucked up, I really really fucked up. I watched Austin run out the door since I was awe struck by the words that had come out of my mouth. 'Pathetic drug addict.' Never in a million years did I ever think I would stoop so low to try to hurt Austin. I wasn't thinking... I honestly wasn't; I was scared. Scared of losing him... But why did I say that?

My mind snapped back out of it's thoughts when Catie threw her keys at me. "Go after him dumb ass!"

I ran outside just as Austin was starting his car up. I tried running after him, but he just sped up until he was completely out of my reach. So I ran back and took Catie's car. I fucked up.

The car seriously could not go fast enough, but the last thing I needed was to be pulled over. Once I got to the house, I basically ran into each door in an attempt to open them. Austin wasn't in the living room, the kitchen, bathroom, or guest rooms. Of course those rooms weren't where I initially thought he was, but I had to check just in case.

I took a deep breath before opening our door. Surprisingly it was unlocked, but more surprisingly... Austin wasn't in there. I looked all around the room before remembering the closet. I knocked on the door to the room in the closet quietly before turning the handle; but that door was locked.

"Austin... Austin... I know you're in there. Can you open up?" I said quietly. I wanted to let him know I wasn't mad anymore. When he didn't reply I knocked again and again, trying to annoy a response out of him.

"Please baby... Come talk to me." I sighed. "I'm not mad anymore..."

"Go the fuck away Shawn." Ouch... Well at least I know he's still alive.

I slid myself down and sat with my back against the door. "I'm not leaving her until we talk baby."

"Fuck you." He said blatantly. We've seriously never been this horrible to each other. But one way or another I was going to get him out of that room. I knew he didn't have his iPod so I softly hit the door with the backside of my head. It didn't hurt, but I knew sooner or later he would get annoyed with the pounding.

Five or ten... Maybe even an hour later I could hear Jaide coming up the stairs. He sighed when he saw me sitting there. "What are you doing Shawn?"

I shrugged, and kept hitting my head against the door. Jaide moved next to me and tried to pull me away from the door, only to have me jerk away.

"Austin..." He sighed again as I started knocked my head against the hard wood. "Your boyfriend is going to give himself a concussion if you don't come out here."

We both were taken in shock when we heard some large piece of furniture move across the floor." He had literally pulled out all the stops to keep me away. When the door opened I stood up at stared at Austin. His eyes were tear stained, but he had a small smile caressing his delicate features.

"Jaide, you can go." Austin said dryly. Jaide obliged Austins wishes, but shot me a nervous look before completely leaving.

"Austin I-" I was interrupted by Austins lips crushing mine. He grabbed my arms and held them down so I couldn't push him away. I walked backwards as he started moving against me, his body guiding us back into the main part of his bedroom. Once he broke away to take a breath I tried talking only to have my mouth covered by his hands.

"Shh." he whispered. "I got it, you were mad at me. Let's not waste time okay? I forgive you." He kissed my neck softly, barely touching the skin before ripping my shirt completely off. In weird ways this aroused me, but definitely not as much as it scared me.

"I... Austin, we need to talk."

"No we don't. I get it, you didn't mean it-" He whispered before nipping my neck. "I forgive you."

Clearly I wasn't going to win this battle of trying to talk. So I let him play. He touched every inch of me with his lips, smiling when he earned a small moan. His hands laid timidly at my boxers, waiting for the right time to start fully undressing me. I didn't know what to do so I just went along with it. His eyes were complete euphoric and the moans that slipped out of my mouth really amplified that look. As soon as he came, he passed out, leaving me in a hot mess. I stared at his unconscious body, completely in shock due to what just happened. He still had a smile on his face... So I guess that means we're really okay?

No, of course we're not. I'm going to have to tell him tomorrow that I was going to that rally with Steven. He really has to learn to trust me, and I mean... God I don't know what I mean. All I ever wanted was to find someone who loved me, and once I do it has to be difficult. Should love be this hard?