Butterflies and Dragonflies

It was Friday and I hadn't spoken to Alex since the incident and my parents decided to ground me. I was also suspended for three days, which meant I could go back on Monday, but I didn't want to. I wasn't ready to face Drew. I hit him. He no doubt hated me now and he'll probably hate me forever. I also wasn't ready to face Alex. He looked so scared of me. He was probably scared that I'd hit him or something. And Amy hasn't spoken to me since then. The only time I see her is at dinner, because I spend most of my time in my room even though I'm allowed to go anywhere in the house. I just wasn't allowed out. And tonight I had that date with Alex, if he even still wanted to go. Sitting in my sad and lonely room made me think and the more I thought about how I hurt Drew and scared Alex away and made my sister hate me, the more I wanted to cause pain to myself. I decided I was stronger than that, so instead of physically causing harm, I caused myself emotional pain by writing poems and songs-which were mostly depressing. But it also relieved some of the pain, just barely.

There was a knock on my door and I called for the person to come in without looking up from my notebook. The only reason I looked up now was because my notebook was snatched away from me. I looked up at Amy as she threw it to the floor, glaring at me. I just stared back at her, not really in the mood for her interrogations and accusations.

"What the hell is your problem, Taylor?" she screamed at me.

"Wow, I haven't talked to my sister, in what, five days? And the first thing she does is yell at me," I said monotonously.

"You deserve it, douche. You jumped to conclusions and you hit Drew, your best friend!" she yelled slapping the pen out of my hand.

"And you don't think I know that?" I asked angrily. "I hate myself for it."

"You haven't called him to apologize. Not that an apology will change things," she said a little quieter. "He's missed school too and he's miserable. He's always curled in a ball and crying!" she said getting loud again.

"Good, now he gets to experience what I went through when he hurt me," I mumbled.

"That's not the same, Taylor!" she yelled. She shook her head at me and continued, "He told his mom he got into a fight with a jock because he was protecting you."

I didn't say anything. I looked down feeling ashamed.

"Why did you do it, Taylor?" she asked sadly.

I could tell that she was close to tears. I looked up at her and shook my head. "I don't know," I whispered. It was silent for a moment before she broke it.

"I'm gonna go visit him," she murmured before walking away.

I stared at the door and leaned back on the backboard of my bed. My eyes closed as I felt tears forming. There was a knock on the door a few minutes later and I ignored it figuring it was my parents or Amy coming to yell at me some more-probably for not saying that'd I go with her to see Drew. Suddenly, I felt arms wrapping around me and someone straddling my waist. I opened my eyes to see Alex's brown eyes staring at me, a small smile adorning his lips.

"Hey, what're you doing here?" I asked surprised.

"We have a date tonight, remember?" he answered.

"Yeah, I know, but I thought you hated me. I thought I scared you away," I said sadly. "And plus I'm grounded."

"Oh, Taylor, I don't hate you," he said soothingly. "It was kinda scary though," he admits.

"I'm sorry," I apologized wrapping my arms around him.

He kissed my lips gently. "And I already knew you were grounded, so I brought food and we can have our date here."

I raised an eyebrow. "How'd you know?"

"Amy," he said shrugging.

He got off of me and pulled me up with him. He placed a blanket on the floor and sat down opening a picinic basket he had brought with him. I sat down beside him. We talked about random things as we ate our sandwiches. I asked him how school was and he said it was boring without me and he had the work I missed but he left it at home. After we finished our sandwiches he pulled out a container of homemade cookies that he said he made. I gasped and snatched the container from him. He giggled and moved so he could sit on my lap, facing me. He took the lid off and the delicious aroma filled my nostrils and I let out a satisfied sigh. He grabbed a cookie and brought it up to my mouth. I eagerly took a bite and kissed him.

"This is delicious," I said taking another bite.

"Thanks," He grinned licking his lips.

I finished the cookie and placed a gentle kiss on his lips that turned into a heated makeout session within seconds. He grounded his hips against mine cauing me to gasp in surprise. He pulled away blushing and I smirked at him. I sat the cookies aside and gently pushed him back so that he was lying on his back and placed my hands on either side of his head and hovered over him. I placed a soft kiss to his lips before going to his neck. I bit down on his flesh and ran my tongue across the area causing Alex to release a sound of pleasure. I smirked and looked into his brown eyes before placing another kiss on his lips. Without warning I brought my hips down to meet his earning a moan from the boy underneath me. I pulled away and let my lips form yet another smirk as I looked down at the boy who was as red as a tomato. I did it again and he bit down on his lip to keep from making another sound, probably in fear that my parents would hear somehow. I wasn't sure if they were even home.

I moved back to his neck and this time he brought his hips up to meet mine. I let out a groan as he did it again. I continued leaving marks on his neck with one of my hands under his shirt. His thrusts got faster and rougher and had me moaning softly. His hands moved to my hair and he tugged on it. I looked back into his brown eyes and palced a kiss on his lips, slowly lifting his shirt up as my hands continued to roam his body. Then my door burst opened.