Why Do I Put Myself in These Situations?

I dumped my back pack onto the floor as soon as I got home and walked into my kitchen.
“Hey mom” I said with a small smile.
My mom kissed my cheek and handed me a bagel.
“Thanks mom” I smiled not intending on eating it, I kinda decided I needed to loose weight pretty bad.

I pulled my cell out of my jean pocket and opened it.
*6 new messages from Twitter*
Opening them and browsing through I stopped when I got to one from Jack’s twitter.

“Spent all day by the old fort. God I miss the old days.”

I growled as I strolled into my living room and clicked reply, putting his twitter name at the start of my message.

“well if you weren’t such a prick maybe it could be like it used to be.”

My phone lit up with a new twitter message in seconds.

“Yeah…guess your right…x”

Shutting my phone and strolling back into the kitchen I saw my mom in a heap on the floor.
“MOM!?” I ran over to her and tried to get her to wake up.

***

When I woke up in the hospital waiting room I was alone. I pulled out my phone and sent a message to twitter.

“Im hospital, mom collapsed, im scared she won‘t be able to fight this cancer much longer”

Tears stung my eyes as I sent the message. I stuffed my cell back into my jeans and stood up wandering off to the café, coffee was needed, I didn’t want to sleep at a time like this. The hospital hallways were empty and cold, my coffee was failing to warm me up and I felt sick from waiting to out how my mom was. As I turned the corner I froze.
“Jack…what are doing here…”

He looked at me sadly ”you never told me your mom had cancer…”
I stared at the floor and pushed the coffee into a bin. “I didn’t think you’d want to hear it.”
Suddenly I was in Jacks arms, he was crying, I was crying, my face buried into his chest. Jack stroked my head.
“I…I left you…you needed me and I left you…”
I didn’t answer him, he was right, I did need him.

“I should have been there…and instead I was a dick.”

***

I woke up with my head on Jack’s shoulder. He had his arm round my waist and was texting someone. I rubbed my eyes and put my hand on his chest “I missed you Jack.”
I was kinda surprised he was still there. Jack smiled softly and leaned his head on mine.
“I’m glad to be in another chapter of your life Kyle.”

A doctor walked over to him “Mrs Burns son?” he looked at Jack who pointed to me, I sat up and looked at the doctor with a fake smile. I was scared.
“Your mothers cancer has spread, I’m afraid she doesn’t have very long left…she has a personal nurse coming home with you.”
Being told someone you love is going to die is an unexplainable feeling. Greif stricken, heart broken, just aren’t the right words. It felt like someone had pierced my heart a hundred times over then left me there to slowly die. I hadn’t realised I was hysterical, my whole body suddenly shaking violently with tears. Jack wrapped his arms tightly round me and kissed my forehead, it didn’t help calm me at all.

Mom was home by that night, Jack was still with me, mom had been happy to see we were talking again so I let him come back. We were currently curled up on my bed, I was trying to be entertaining for him but it wasn’t happening. He didn’t seem to mind though as he lay with me cuddled into his chest, I missed his smell more than anything. As the time went on I realised I hadn’t slept properly in almost 2 days.

My eyes felt heavy and they flickered shut.