The Softer Side of Unbearable

Bailey spent the next few days feeling cold. The disturbance that she had felt when she had visited Angel hadn't gone away. She blamed her discomfort on whatever seemed justifiable at each particular moment. Sometimes it was the fact that she missed her own bed, sometimes it was the fact that Matt wasn't around, but mostly she had to admit that she was just plain lost.

Angel had gone from being a close friend to her biggest fear.

On the day that Matt was due to return, Bailey had her bag packed and waiting by the door before he brother had even left for work. He eyed her curiously.

"Are you that sick of us already?"

"Very funny," she rolled her eyes at him. "I just need to go home for a little while."

Brian nodded. "Right. And I'm sure that the fact that you haven't seen Matt in a week has nothing to do with it."

"Not at all. You know that I would stay with Gavin forever if I could."

He smiled at her. "I know. I'm just bugging you. Just in case you're gone before I go home, we'd better say goodbye now."

Bailey nodded and hugged her brother tightly. "Thank you for everything. You have no idea how much I appreciate it."

"Anytime. Call me to let me know that you got home safe."

Melanie had the day off, so she sat with Bailey and Gavin in the living room while they played throughout the morning. The two women chatted about the lighter things in life; Melanie seemed to know that Bailey didn't want to discuss Angel. She would have to have that conversation when Matt arrived, and for now she just wanted a break.

Bailey managed to keep their attention centered on Grover from Sesame Street for a full ten minutes. It was clear to Melanie just how badly Bailey wanted to focus on happy things. It was nearly two o'clock when the doorbell rang. Gavin was on his feet and running for the door before anyone else had even moved. Bailey hoisted herself up from the floor and followed the child, smiling to herself. She had really missed Matt, even though he hadn't been gone for very long.

"Hey!" She could hear Matt greeting Gavin before she could see him. "How's it going, Gavin?"

"Are you here for Auntie Bailey?" Gavin asked.

"I sure am. Is she here? Or did she get sick of waiting for me and leave?"

"I did," Bailey said, leaning up against the wall near the kitchen. "But then Melanie called me and said something about walking to Vancouver being a bad idea, so I came back."

"Really?" Matt cocked his head to one side. "Since when is hitchhiking a bad idea?"

"I don't know," Bailey shrugged, smiling at him. "I thought it was a perfectly safe form of transportation."

Matt beckoned her forward, and she rushed across the room and into his arms. She immediately felt safe and secure when she was in his grasp. He clutched her tightly and brought his lips to her ear.

"How are you doing?"

"I'm better now," she replied.

"Yeah, me too. Ready to go home?"

Bailey pulled back and shook her head at him. "I can't."

"What?" Matt raised his eyebrows in shock. "Why not? What did I miss?"

She grinned and leaned down to pick up Gavin. "You owe this little guy a playdate."

"I," Matt paused, still unsure. "I do?"

Bailey and Gavin both nodded simultaneously.

"He didn't really get the chance to know you last time," Bailey explained. "He told me that he didn't like you. So I promised him that the two of you would have some time together before we leave. You know that I can't handle it if he hates you."

Matt nodded, smiling warmly at Gavin. "Alright little man, let's have some fun."

"I just bought him some Transformers," Bailey whispered to Matt. "You're welcome."

Matt's expression turned from one of warmth to giddiness. "Excellent! I call Optimus Prime!"

"No," Gavin told him sternly. His firmly set mouth portrayed how serious he really was. "You can be Megatron."

Matt's face fell. "No fair!"

Bailey carried Gavin back into the living room. "Remember what Elmo said today?" She said patiently to her nephew. "We share, right?"

Gavin pouted as she set him down beside his toys. "But I wanted to be Optimus Prime," he told her in a pitifully sad voice.

"Matt, you should be Bumblebee. He's my favourite, anyways," Bailey proposed. "That way, nobody has to be Megatron. I don't know why I bought the stupid thing if nobody is going to play with it."

"Maybe you could be Megatron, Auntie Bailey!" Gavin squealed.

"There is no way that you're dumping the bad guy on me," she planted her hands on her hips. "I'm going to go have some coffee with your mommy, okay? Play nice, boys."

She headed over to the dining room table and sat down across from Melanie. They two of them watched as Matt and Gavin played for a long moment in silence. When Matt threw Megatron into the air and made a loud, explosion-like sound, Bailey laughed.

"I always thought that Gavin was the best distraction that I could have. Now, I think that the two of them together are even better."

"Why do you think I keep your brother around?" Melanie smiled. "When they play together, it's the only time of day that I get to myself. Just wait until you get married and have kids. You will never go looking for a distraction again. There will be two really big ones living with you."

"Call me crazy, but that doesn't seem like a bad thing."

The two women turned their conversation to Brian's plans to remodel the kitchen. Bailey had always felt like Melanie was the sister that she'd never had, and the two of them got along really well. She had often found herself staying for days longer than she had intended to, simply because while Brian was at work she got to have some time to talk to Melanie alone.

"Hey guys," Bailey called out as she looked at the clock on the wall. "How many times have you killed Megatron?"

"Uh," Matt paused, looking at the massive structures that he had contructed from Lego to represent skyscrapers. "I don't know. A lot?"

"I counted twenty-nine," Bailey told him. "Even for a Decepticon, that's a lot for one day. Maybe it's time he got a break."

Matt picked up on her meaning. "It's getting late, huh?"

"Let's just say that we won't have to worry about rush hour traffic when we get back to the city."

The two of them gathered up Bailey's things and said goodbye to Melanie and Gavin. Bailey got into Matt's truck and awaited the inevitable conversation about Angel. To her surprise, Matt started the engine, patted her knee, and smiled.

"I really like that kid."

"Yeah, he's pretty cool. I'm assuming that he doesn't hate you now, at the very least."

"I should hope not! We had a great day!"

"The first of many, right?" Bailey prodded.

Matt looked over at her and nodded his head. "Sure. Anytime."

He told her stories from his latest tour to entertain her during the ride back to Vancouver. The air in the car was light and pleasant; for the first time in a long time, Bailey was completely relaxed around Matt. There was nothing pressing to discuss, and all stress was pushed to the back of her mind. This was how things should have been with Matt all along.

"So," Matt said conversationally. "Am I taking you home? Or over to my place? Or maybe... somewhere else?"

Bailey frowned. She should have known that the peace couldn't last. "I know what you're thinking. It was hard enough going to see her with Jeff there to mediate. I don't know if I can do it alone."

Matt's eyebrows raised ever so slightly. He shrugged his shoulders. "Alright. Home it is, then. Actually, I'll take you to my place. Brett is on his way over there to catch the game."

Bailey nodded, recalling Matt's friend and guitar technician, Brett. He was a fun guy to be around. Maybe he would be a good person to hang out with right then. She might be able to completely forget her troubles. It was a promising thought.

"Besides," Matt said as he flicked on his signal light and made a right turn. "It's not like she won't still be there tomorrow."

"Matt," Bailey's tone was heavy with warning.

He glanced over at her. His eyes were serious and almost a bit troubled. "You're the bigger person here. Maybe you should act like it sometimes."

She scowled, watching a child run through a nearby park. "Today I want to be a small person. I don't want to have to spend every second consumed with guilt and worry over her. I want to spend a relaxing day with you. Just one. Can't I have that?"

Matt sighed. His facial expression was lost somewhere between frustrated and embarassed. "Of course you can. I'm sorry that I brought it up. I just wanted you to be able to talk to me about what's going on, even if it's not very happy."

"Believe me," Bailey murmured. "You're the only one that I trust to handle the burden."