Will You Be There for Me?

“Good job winning the Dew Cup.” Ryan Nyquist smiled.

He had won the Dew Cup as well for BMX dirt, Shaun did as well, and we were holding a huge shindig at Jake’s place in L.A.

Zane, Chris, Jake and a whole bunch of skaters and riders were here. I had already had a bit to drink, but it wasn’t like I really cared. My parents were ok with it, they grew up being allowed to party, of course in discretion and they allowed me to, because they new I was only a kid for so long, but being successful as well definitely helped in my favor.

“How much have you had to drink?” Jake laughed, as I mixed some vodka, rum and whiskey together.

“Only a little bit, I’m buzzed, but that’s it.” I replied, I had only had about four shots of vodka and a shot of Jack, and I needed a lot more than that to be even close to drunk.

“Is a mixture of vodka, rum and whiskey going to send you just over the edge to drunkenness?” He laughed.

“Nah, but it’ll get me closer.” I laughed, taking a sip of the harsh, yet delicious mixture that made my throat burn on the way down.

“You want a chase?” He laughed, making his way to grab the Coke.

“Since when have I ever chased my alcohol?”

“Touche.” He smiled before giving me a quick congratulatory hug then going off to hit on one of the girls.

I added a bit more alcohol to my beverage so my glass was now full and would last me a good little while before I had to go back for a refill.

I went into the living room and saw Shaun sitting on the couch, talking with Scotty and some guy I had never seen before.

I made my way over to them, feeling the alcohol take a bit more of an affect.

I sat down next to Shaun, across from Mason and his friend.

“Aren’t you a little young to be drinking?” Mason laughed.

I shrugged lightly and took a gulp of my drink, lowering it slowly before I began to play with the generic party red cup.

Shaun swiftly grabbed my cup before taking a sip and forcing it down, making a disgusted face before coughing and handing it back to me.

“What the fuck is that?”

“Vodka, rum and whiskey.” I replied bluntly, taking another gulp.

“How can you drink that? It’s so gross.”

“Your opinion, I like it; although it’s better in shot form. You can quickly gulp it down and not taste the horrid raspberry flavored vodka. I prefer it without flavor.”

“That’s disgusting.” Mason agreed with Shaun.

“How much have you had to drink?” Shaun asked as I rested my head on his shoulder.

I had officially reached that point where all the alcohol was settling in and making me tipsy, and when I got the slightest bit tipsy, just before I reach that stage of hammered, I get relatively tired when I’m not moving around.

“Four shots of vodka and a shot of Jack. Oh, and this.” I mumbled, raising my cup.

“I think you can stop.” Shaun laughed, snaking his arm around my waist.

“No, I’m ok, I haven’t reached that point where I need a sip of water before puking, that’s when I stop.”

“So, you stop when you puke?” Mason’s friend asked.

“No, that’s not what I said, and who are you to judge anyway? I don’t even know you.” I shot.

“Someone’s a little iffy when intoxicated.” Mason laughed.

“Only when people like this are around.” I mumbled, lifting my head off Shaun’s shoulder to take another sip of my concoction.

“Slow down.” Shaun laughed, attempting to take my drink away.

He held up his free hand defensively when I refused to hand over my drink.

“I’m almost done.” I explained before quickly finishing off my drink.

“Are you already finished that?” Jake laughed, making his way over.

I nodded my head solemnly, “Yup, it was good.” I laughed.

“You want another one?”

“I don’t think she needs another one.” Mason stated.

“Just get me a shot or two of Jack and I’m set for the rest of the night.” I mumbled before resting my head back on Shaun’s shoulder, taking deep breath to keep myself from getting light headed and from falling asleep.

“You ok?” Mason asked.

“Ya, tired, I need to get up and walk around, I’ll definitely fall asleep otherwise.” I laughed.

“You just look kind of pale is all.” He replied as Shaun started stroking my side to make me feel safe.

“Nah, I’m fine.” I yawned as Jake came back with two shots of a clear brown liquid I knew as Jack Daniels.

I sat up straight and took one of the shots he held in his hand and quickly knocked it back, feeling the liquid burn my throat on its way down.

“Well she can knock down a shot a lot better than I can.” Mason’s still unknown friend laughed before I knocked back my last shot and set the glasses on the table next to the couch that held the lamps.
My stomach started to churn lightly and I knew that if I either drank some more alcohol or didn’t take a sip of water I’d puke in a few minutes.

“Jake,” I slurred, hunching over and resting my head in my hands as Shaun rubbed my back, “Could you please get me a glass of water, y’know, before I puke within the next three minutes.” I asked calmly.

“Sure thing.” He replied, jetting off into the kitchen.

Shaun pulled me in closer to him, running my side to keep me from puking until Jake came back with a glass of water.

“Thanks dude.” I half smiled, taking the half full cup of water and taking a small sip of water before setting it down and sitting up fully, feeling a lot better.

I had always been one of those people who could drink a lot for how tiny I was and actually hold my alcohol until I reached that point where I felt like I was about to puke, but I could easily continue drinking after I took a tiny sip of water.

“You should probably finish that water.” Shaun urged.

“No, I’d be a cheater and I’m fine now.” I replied with a smile, setting my head on his shoulder again.

“How would you be a cheater?” Mason asked quizzically.

“She has this weird drinking mind set, where if you actually drink a full amount of water, you’re a cheater because you can’t drink or something and told everyone you got super hammered if you had to drink a glass of water in between. Plus, everyone has this theory she doesn’t get hangovers because she has some water before she pukes.”

“Because it’s not that water that prevents a hangover, it’s just the way I am. I’d rather have a nice little sip of water and prevent myself from puking then puking to prove nothing.” I mumbled, pretty sure I just mumbled the whole side of my conversation, making the last portion completely incoherent.

“I think she should go home.” Mason laughed.

“Ya, Alison you need to go home before you pass out in my living room again.” Jake laughed.

I simply nodded my head in agreement, and with Shaun’s help he helped me up.

“I’ll take her home, I’m not a huge drinker anyway.” Shaun smiled as I regained my balance.

“I think it would be best if you did also, I’m sure she’ll get lost or pass out in the middle of someone’s lawn if she goes home alone.” Jake laughed.

“Hey, I’m not completely inept when I’m not sober, thank you.” I stated.

“Well, she can pronounce inept correctly and sue it correctly when drunk, so I’m sure she’ll be fine, but I’ll walk her just in case.” Shaun chuckled.

“Alright, well, I’ll see you tomorrow then.” Mason smiled and we made our way out the house, Shaun resting his hand on my waist to keep me stable as we maneuvered our way around everyone.

I was just thankful that Jake lived just three houses down from me, s it didn’t take to long for me to stumble into my clean, empty, quiet, alcohol free smelling air.

“We need to get you to bed.” Shaun instructed as he led me to the stairs, helping me up each and every step so I wouldn’t fall to my death.

He helped me stumble into my room and instructed me to get changed into my pajamas as he got me a glass of water and an Advil.

I climbed onto my bed as soon as Shaun walked into my room, setting the glass of water and Advil on my side table and lying down next to me.

“Than you Shaun.” I said, moving closer to him and resting my head on his chest as his arms snaked around my torso, holding me closer to him.

“No problem.” He replied quietly, kissing the top of my head before playing with a strand of my hair.

“I’m sorry.” I mumbled out of nowhere, feeling the need to say sorry for everything I’ve put him through since the day we’ve met.

“For what, what could you possibly be sorry for?”

“For everything I’ve ever put you through, especially for making you have to wait for me. You’re the sweetest guy, especially after everything, and you still carry me home and the only thing I do to you in return is hurt you. And I’m really sorry, because I really do like you, a lot. A lot more than just a friend, and I’m really sorry.” I replied, “Sorry,” I laughed, “I’m a little emotional when I’m drunk sometimes; I just let everything spill out.” I smiled.

“Then why keep me waiting?” He asked simply as he continued to play with my hair, completely ignoring everything else I had said, “I mean, it’s not hurting me that you keep me waiting, it is a little heart wrenching, but why keep me waiting if you like me back?”

“Because I’m scared.” I replied simply, tracing circles on his chest.

“Of what?”

“Of falling for you.”

“W-why would that scare you?” He asked, a hint of disappointment in his voice that made my heart drop as he stopped playing with my hair, so in return I stopped tracing circles on his chest and looked up at him to look him in the eyes.

“Because I’m scared it won’t work out and you’ll walk out of my life, or I’ll fuck it up and you won’t be around anymore, I’m scared of you leaving me, I’m scared of you not being around. So I’m keeping you around as long as I possibly can.” I replied, pouring out everything I felt about him and our relationship, if I weren’t in the slightest bit drunk I would’ve never told him all of this, but I knew I had to confess, even if I won’t remember in the morning.

He smiled lightly at me, his eyes twinkling slightly, “I promised I’d wait and that I’d always be here for you, and that’s exactly it, I won’t go back on my word. You have nothing to be scared about.”

“I know, but I still am, and when I won’t be and will be willing to take that risk with you, I will. But it’s not today.” I replied laying my head back on his chest.

“And I can respect that, but you need sleep so I’ll jet off and let you sleep.” He replied as he moved out from under me and stood up.

“Shaun?” I asked, grabbing his hand before he could leave.

“Mhm?”

“Please don’t leave me.” I begged.

“I already promised I wouldn’t.” He replied, staring back at me oddly.

“No, I mean stay here with me please, spend the night.” I asked quietly.

He smiled down at me and proceeded to kick off his shoes, “Fine.” He laughed, as he got minorly undressed, leaving his underwear and shirt on before following suit and climbing under the covers.

I repositioned myself so my head was on his chest and he was holding me in his arms again, and it felt absolutely right. The only way to possibly describe it would be in the exact same corny movie ways, the Earth felt in sync and I felt like nothing in the world could possibly harm except for the boy who held me in his arms. He could just as quickly take everything that made me feel safe, make every wall I ever built up and that he built up to protect me, come crashing down. He could give me everything I wanted and just as quickly yank it all away from under my feet, and that’s what scared me most, that’s what kept me from being with him. I trust myself with him, and taking the risk that he could possibly tear everything down, and it scared me to no end. I loved the feeling of being so safe, yet so out in the open and vulnerable, but I wasn’t ready to feel like that all the time, not yet, not yet.

“Good night Alison.” Shaun whispered, kissing the top of my head.

“Good night Shaun.” I whispered back before falling asleep in his arms.