Will You Be There for Me?

“So, why are you skating without a shirt on… again?” Chris asked as he walked on to my patio where Scotty and Mason were chilling as they watched Shaun and I skate.

“She’s done this before?” Scotty laughed.

“Ya, except she was in her bra and not in a bikini top.” Jake replied, slightly confused.

“It’s too hot to skate with a shirt on.” I replied bluntly as I landed a trick Shaun had just shown to me before walking over to him.

“Skank.” Jake muttered jokingly before snatching my board.

“Oi! I am no such thing!” I shouted at him as he dipped into the pool while he flipped me off.

I sat down in between Mason and Scotty and watched as Jake, Chris and Zane skated. Shaun joined us shortly after setting his board next to him as he sat next to Scotty.

“Is it safe for me to go sit on the ramp, take pictures and stuff, Jake absolutely insisted I do so.” Scotty slightly whined, rolling his eyes.

I shrugged y shoulders lightly, “Don’t see why not.” I replied rubbing the back of my neck to try and get rid of the kink in my neck that one of my falls had left behind.

Scotty got up and booked it to the other side of my skate park as Shaun moved over to sit next to me.

“What are you doing?” Mason laughed, looking at me oddly as I tried to soothe my neck.

“Remember when I stupidly fell trying to pull off the fucking easiest trick known to man?” I asked as he simply nodded his head in response.

“Ya, total fucking whiplash or something, my neck is intense pain right now, it sucks.” I whined.

“That’s what you get for being made of fail.” Mason teased, sticking out his tongue at me while Shaun sorta lifted me up and set me on his lap.

“What in the world are you doing Shaun?” Mason asked, thinking the same thing as me as Shaun moved my hair to the front of my left shoulder.

“My mom showed me how to get these annoying and painful kinda kinks out.” He replied bluntly before he started massaging me.

“Ah, you just want to touch a half naked chick.” Mason joked earning a middle finger from me.

“Awe, look at little Shauny, giving back massages.” Scotty cooed as he made his way back over to us.

I could sense Shaun rolling his eyes as he continued to massage my neck moving down slightly to my back.

“Shaun, why are your hands freezing?” I laughed.

“Oh sorry, and I don’t know.” He laughed as took his hands off of me.

“I didn’t say stop though, it’s just strange.” I chuckled as he continued to massage my back.

“Someone likes to have Shaun’s hands all over ‘em.” Scotty laughed.

“Shut up, it actually feels really nice, do not judge me.” I replied.

“I’m not judging,” He replied holding his hands up defensively, “I mean, he’s got his hands all over you, and you’re half naked.” He smirked.

“You’re gross, go away, I don’t want to see your face.” I replied jokingly.

“Fine, I can take a hint, I know when I’m not wanted.” He replied before getting up and heading back to take more pictures.

“Alright, is it gone?” Shaun asked.

I moved my neck around to find the kink had surprisingly disappeared.

“It’s gone dude, thanks.” I smiled at him gratefully after I got off of his lap.

“No problem.” He smiled back at me before grabbing his board and going off to skate with everyone else.

“Anything happen between you and Shaun while I was training today?” Mason asked casually as I leaned back on my hands.

The subject of Shaun and I’s relationship had become a casual conversation for Mason and I. It was almost like asking me how the movie I watched last night was.

“Um, ya, some stuff.” I replied.

“Would you like to expand on that?” Mason laughed as he turned to look at me.

“Um, we talked about how you and everyone else keeps telling me to wake up and shit.”

“What’d Shaun say?”

“That you guys are dumb for rushing me into getting into a relationship with him and that I should take my time if I’m not ready.”

“We’re not rushing, we just don’t want him to have moved on when you’re finally ready.” Mason argued.

“He said he’d wait for me and that he’d wait as long as it’d take.” I replied.

Mason sighed and rolled his eyes, “Is that all that happened?”

“Um, no.” I replied hesitantly.

“Did you guys kiss again for the millionth time?” Mason sighed.

“Ya, um, I kinda kissed him on the cheek when he dropped me off, then he just yanked me back down when I tried to get up and kissed me.” I replied, feeling myself blush slightly.

“Why’d you kiss him to begin with? Why do you keep kissing him, then denying him later?”

“Because, I like him a lot, but I’m not ready for the relationship part of it all.”

“But Shaun is, he wants a relationship with you, why do you keep denying him of that? He wants to be happy with you and you keep making him think ‘oh, this time she’ll say yes.’ And then you deny him, why get his hopes up and make things more complicated?”

“I didn’t kiss him this time, he kissed me! I like him, Mason, a lot but I’m not ready for the kind of relationship he wants, not yet.”

“So you want a friend with benefits then?” Mason scoffed.

“No! Not at all, it’s just, at that time in seemed fit, and he kissed me!” I repeated.

“What would cause you to kiss him on the cheek at least, that still means something!” He replied, trying not to shout.

“Because he said he loved me.” I whispered harshly, almost instantly regretting what I had said.

“He what?” Mason asked, mouth agape.

“Never mind.” I replied instantly.

“No, he told you he loved you?” Mason asked, acting as if what Shaun had said was the biggest mistake he could ever make.

“Ya.” I replied silently, really just wanting this conversation to end.

“And that doesn’t scare you or freak you out in the slightest?”

“Not really, no, why? Should it?” I asked, rather confused.

“Well, you’re cared of being with him for that reason.”

“No, I’m not scared of him being in love with me.” I replied instantly.

“Well, do you love him back at least?”

I sighed heavily before sitting up right, “I don’t even know, how do you tell if you love someone or not?”

“I don’t know, isn’t it like in all those movies and stuff where you feel all giddy around the person and stuff like that?”

I shrugged lightly, not knowing how to respond; “Shaun said something about always having them on your mind and just feeling different around them and stuff.” I mumbled.

“Well, I’m sure Shaun knows better than I do about the whole ‘love’ ordeal, or at least now he does.” Mason replied, “But that’s not important right now, right now it’s whether you feel that or not.”

“I really don’t know dude, it’s weird. I mean, I feel different around him then when I do around you, or like, Jake and them, but I don’t know if it’s love or a huge crush, y’know what I mean?” I replied, biting down on my lip.

“Maybe if you elaborated on how you felt I could help you out.” Mason laughed.

“I feel like I should be discussing this with a chick, not you.” I smiled.

“Well, you have no girl friends, so you’re going to have to deal, I’ll be your relationship consultant, and this consultant needs to know how you feel.” Mason laughed.

I sighed heavily and smiled back at him, “I just don’t want to come off as this love drunk girl.” I mumbled, “I have a reputation to uphold.” I joked.

“Well, I’m sure your rep can take a backseat on this one.” Mason replied, “Shaun told you how he felt, he went all sappy and he’s the dude, now it’s your turn.”

I raked my hands through my hair before turning to look at him, “I don’t know how to describe it.”

Mason sighed, rolling his eyes, “Ok then, when you hug or chill out, how do you feel?”

“I don’t know, it feels differently then when I hug anyone else or chill with anyone else, I feel, like, almost safe I guess with him. Almost like nothing can get to me, y’know?”

“Alright, what about when you kiss? All the fucking time.” Mason replied, whispering the last sentence under his breath.

“I heard that, and I actually feel something when I kiss him, not like ‘Oh, he kissed me, whatever, that’s cool’. Like, it actually means something?” I replied, unsure of my answer and how I felt.

“Alright, now one more thing, is he always on your mind? ‘Cause I know you’re always on his; he won’t stop talking about you, it’s insane. Whatever insane trick you did, or taught him, or whatever you two have planned for the upcoming week, he’s always talking about you. I’m sure he skates and boards on your behalf now, it’s wild.” Mason laughed.

I smiled back at him before turning to look at the guys skating, Shaun was leaning up against the guardrail waiting his turn, and I knew he could feel me looking at him because he looked over at me and smiled.

I smiled back at him before turning to look at Mason, “Ya, he’s always on my mind, I mean, he has to be if every conversation I have with anyone is always about him, right?”

“That’s not what I asked though, I asked if you’re always thinking about him, sure he talks about you all the time, but it’s obvious whenever he thinks about you, he’s just happier and when he rides, he rides harder and better, it’s obvious.”

“Mason, I don’t know what to tell you about how I feel about him, I can’t describe it, I just can’t. I mean, sure he makes me feel safe, yes I feel something when we kiss, and I do think about him all the time, but I don’t know what else to say.”

“You know, Shaun was a lot more descriptive about his feelings towards you. He got all sappy and everything, he was shunned by Scotty for a good hour.” Mason laughed.

“It couldn’t have been that bad.” I laughed, jokingly rolling my eyes.

“He said you made him nervous all the time and that he makes up stupid excuses or does stupid things just to touch you.” Mason replied, lifting the corner of his mouth slightly.

I sighed heavily, “Fine, I’ll be more descriptive.” I replied in almost a sarcastic tone.

“Then commence.” Mason urged with a smile.

I bit my lip lightly and played with my fingers as I looked down at the ground, hoping that if I don’t look at Mason that he won’t actually hear me, “He makes me happy whenever we’re around, like really happy. The other day, when I was really drunk and he brought me home and stayed the night, I felt safe. I mean, he made me feel like nothing could ever hurt me and it felt right to have him hold me like he did, it just fit. And when he touches me it sends a shiver down my spine, it’s just that typical romantic movie crap all the time when I’m around him.” I said silently and rushfully, trying to get everything out of that way as quickly as possible.

I looked up at Mason to see him smiling at me the same way Zane had earlier before he leaned back on his hands.

“What?” I asked.

“Nothing.” He smirked

“Seriously, what? Why are you smiling like that?” I asked, crossing my arms.

“Dude, I think you’re in love with Shaun. Just think about it.”

I just looked at him and remained silent.

Was I in love with him? I didn’t even know, I mean, everything I had told Mason was true. My heart skipped a beat every time he was around; when he smiled at me these non-existent butterflies just went berserk in my stomach; whenever he touched me it sent shivers down my spine and my skin tingled from where his hands had been. My breath got caught in my throat and my heart beat increased whenever we kissed, I mean, whenever I only hung out with him, and no one else was around, all I wanted to do was kiss him.

A wave of reality just washed over me and I looked over at Mason, “Dude, I think I’m in love with Shaun.”