Leaves.

“The leaves, they’re so time-consuming. Covering up this piece of land, taunting me to move them. It’s like I can’t win; I move them, they float back into place. Almost as if they’re drawn to this very spot, burying it underneath layers of their brown and green beings. The cover up the beauty of what this is, trying to prove that there is nothing more beautiful in this area than themselves - they’re exactly like us, in that sense.

“Everyday I come back, and they’re here. They don’t go away. Maybe they’re as attracted to this as I am; maybe they’re competing with me; maybe I’m just crazy. Love only knows the answer.”

Behind me, I can hear the leaves rustling in the wind. I pull my coat tighter around my small body as my eyes begin to water from the cold, harsh winds.

“See, right now, they’re making circles around me. The wind, it works in league with the leaves, just to spite me. Conspiracy theory 101,” I laugh lightly, yet bitterly - happiness is beyond me, “It’s all just one big scheme, a plan, against me. Soon everyone will see the grass growing around me, the weeds trapping my body like a human cocoon. What a sight that would be, eh…”

Around me the winds get stronger, wilder and the clouds thicken - a storm is brewing. Suddenly, my coat seems like nothing but a thin piece of cloth, rather than the thick, warm piece of clothing I left my apartment wearing. Despite my best attempts to keep myself warm, I begin to shiver.

“There’s not enough time. There’s not enough life left in me. There’s never enough of anything, it’s a cruel world like that.”

I sigh, looking up at the sky. I can feel the tears welling up in my eyes, but I blink them away. Staying strong is the key; I don’t need to cry, I’m strong. I’m powerful. Squeezing my eyes shut, preventing the tears from dropping, I lower my head.

“Look, the leaves are back. Those time-consuming leaves. Some think I’m crazy, here everyday, cleaning this piece of land, leaving, then coming back. But they don’t understand, no-one understands. No-one can ever understand. I can’t even understand…”

A single tear drops, staining my pale, lifeless cheek. Maybe being strong is crying, not holding it in. Then again, maybe I’m just a simple human being, just like everyone else. I don’t need to be perfect, I don’t need to be strong all the time. That’s life, right?

“I can’t even understand it, so how can they? It’s not the same anymore, nothing is. It can’t be, it never will be! Life is nothing without you, that’s what no-one can grasp.”

The tears now fall freely down my cheeks now, I do nothing to hold them in, it’s pointless. I have nothing, no-one, to hide from.

“Everyday is the same as the last, the same as the next will be too. I get up, skip breakfast, go to work. Then I come home, after skipping lunch, and maybe have a slice of toast or two for dinner. Then I come here. My life used to be so much more. Now it’s just empty. I’m empty.

“I’m just a shell of a person, a ghost in my own body - my own life! No perfected-fake smiles, or over-the-top laughing, can hide those facts.”

I wipe away the tears from my eyes and crouch down, “One day, I’ll see you again. I promise.”

Kissing the top of the gravestone, I stand up and brush down my jacket. “I love you.” I whisper, almost inaudibly. Then I turn to leave, the tears start up, all over again. And, as if on cue, the clouds darken and it begins to rain.

Tonight, the sky cries with me.