Painting Flowers

“You ready?” Mark asked, sliding a belt through the loops of his jeans.

“Born ready.” I replied, fixing the sleeves of my tee shirt. A smile curled across his lips as he imagined the promise the night held. Side by side we sauntered into the club, swagger emanating from our very pores. When we entered, heads turned and people stared. We were those people. We were hot. We were everything that anyone could want to be.

Because let’s face it, we were rock stars.

“Last party before tour is always sweetest.” He hissed, licking his lips as he took in the scene. The club was dark. Bass shook the room, the thudding pulse of the playing song. Neon flashing lights danced across the spot where we stood, waiting to start the night. People’s silhouettes were outlined in red and blue and the glasses in their hands cast crystals along the walls. A crowded human sea stretched in front of me, only to lead up to a gold balcony above the bar. Voices and drunken laughter carried throughout, breaking up the now practically incoherent music. Scanning the crowd I spotted several recognizable faces and I nodded.

“There’s Stevie.” I pointed to a tall beanie-clad brunette in the corner. I raised an eyebrow and shot him a wave.

“Hey- hey Alex!” He cried, jumping to where we were in his purple skinny jeans and black tank top. Mark grinned at a girl seated at the bar and Stevie rolled his eyes.

“Mark, really? You’ve been here for, like, six minutes and you’re already scoping out girls?”

“I’m always on the prowl Steven.” Mark rested his arm on his shoulder and I laughed.

“Whatever makes you happy.” He replied. As he spoke Vinny stumbled to us.

“Hey…” He slurred. I couldn’t help but laugh. Vinny was always the first to get drunk. Always. I pulled him in and patted him on the back, ruffling his flaming red hair.

“Oh Vinny.” Mark smirked, smacking him on the cheek.

“THE GANG’S ALL HERE!” He shouted, wearing a drunken grin. Laughter broke out among us as we admired the truth to his words. There we stood, Mark, Stevie, Vinny and I. The gang. The Read.

“Since we were sixteen that was us, The Read. The ambitious teens with sights set on stardom. Who knew we’d get so far?” He garbled.

“Yeah, it sure has been a while.” I assured him. “Hey Vinny, do you want me to take you home? You’re a little bit…”

“DON’T MAKE ME LEAVE NOW!” He elbowed me in the stomach and I grunted.

“You’re drunk. You should go home and sleep before you do something stupid.” Mark added.

“Whatever.”

“Come on Vinny, I’ll take you home.” Stevie offered.

“Thanks dude.” Mark said. “I should stay… I’m scoping out a tall brunette in the corner.” I shivered.

“I owe you Stevie.” I said, scanning the room. “I’m really sorry, but I have to go see-”

“BROOKE.” Vinny, Mark and Stevie groaned. I rolled my eyes in an attempt to avoid the impending conversation.

“Stop.”

“Why is she here?”

“Hmm, I’ll go with option A; SHE’S MY GIRLFRIEND.” I defended.

“Whatever.” Vinny said again, stomping his feet on the black linoleum floor.

“Have fun with her.” Mark grinned as he walked off to the tall brunette. Upon seeing him, the girl immediately flashed a smile. Mark wrapped his arm around her and shot us a thumbs up.

“How does he do it?” Stevie asked after Mark had left.

“He’s always been like that.” I reminded him. “Mark always gets the girl.”

“I like how she failed to notice that the rest of us are in The Read too.” He sighed. “I guess he’s just the most popular.”

“It must be the hair.” I laughed. Every one of us had nice hair, but Mark’s was the best. Straight in the front, spiky in the back and jet- black all over. He always offers to give me advice saying; “you know a little mousse goes a long way!” or “meet teasing comb; your new best friend.” It kills him that I just let my dark brown hair fall in front of my eyes.

“Must be,” Stevie sighed, adjusting the beanie resting on his head. “Well I guess I’ll drive our little friend home. Shouldn’t you go find Brooke?”

“Yeah…” I trailed off. “Not before I drown myself in Jack Daniels.”

“I hear you. I would do the same if I had to spend the night with her.” I nodded and he struggled away with Vinny draped over his shoulders. Meanwhile, I made my way over to the bar. I found an empty seat on the end next to a tattoo-clad woman. Sliding into the seat, I placed my order. A minute later a bottle of beer and a shot of Jack sat in front of me.

I quickly drank both.

Then I started again.

I needed to find Brooke, she would be mad if I didn’t. Maybe if I sit in this exact spot forever… she’ll never find me. Each passing shot convinced me that that would be the best option. Each one tasted like fire slipping through my throat. I could feel my senses numbing, my muscles relaxing. I could feel myself forgetting my responsibility, my promise to Brooke. The drunker I got, the less I thought about her. I kept closing my eyes. Close. Open. Close. Open. At one point I slipped off my stool, only to be saved by tattoo woman. I laid my head on the bar and closed my eyes, succumbing to the sensation of sleep. People moved around me, I could feel the stale bar air whooshing past my face as they did. Laughter and voices echoed around me. I felt cold and hollow. I felt dirty and cheap.

I felt worthless.

The air was sticky and hot, causing my hair to stick to my face in sweaty clumps. I forced a clumsy hand through it, then fell back to the surface of the bar. Moving made me feel nauseous. The surface of the bar was dusty and grimy, but my head was too heavy to lift. I again attempted to open my eyes, which was a mistake. The world appeared, then burnt out like a flickering candle.

Finally, I felt good. The world had been blown out.

When I woke up, I was off my bar stool. Instead, I was sprawled out on an unfamiliar sofa. The lights were off, and everything seemed hazy. I sat up, throwing my hand to my mouth to avoid throwing up. My head was spinning. Where was I? Was I still at the club? My head was pounding… I needed to lie down. I dropped back to the couch, grabbing my sides and moaning. Close. Open. Close. Open. I assume I’m in hell. I moaned again, trying to make sense of the dark, hot room. Close.

Open. A shroud of blonde hair hung over me.

“Who…” I began. The girl put a finger over my mouth, silencing me.

“Don’t worry Alex…” She hissed. “I’m taking good care of you.”

“Who…” I repeated.

“It’s Brooke silly.” She smashed her wet lips against mine. I tried to sit up, but she urged me to lie back down.

“No… I feel sick…” I stammered, my head pounding. I just wanted to sleep, to lay by myself.

“Alex, it’s okay.” She assured me, peeling the sweaty shirt over my head. “I’m your girlfriend. We’re allowed to do these things you know.”

“Okay.” I replied, slipping in and out of consciousness. I knew what I was about to do, but I was sure I would not remember the next day.

“Good boy.” She smiled in the dimly lit room. Opening my eyes hurt too much, I managed to crack them just enough to see how little Brooke was wearing. She wrapped her arm around my bare back, fumbling with the belt of my jeans. I laughed in spite of myself.

“Having fun?” She giggled, pinning her lips against mine once more. I nodded, clumsily tangling my fingers in her hair. She continued pressing against me, her body heat crushing me in the already sweltering room. She pulled the belt through the loops of my jeans and unbuttoned them before sitting upright.

“Now tell me you love me.” She said.

“I love you Brooke.” I slurred.

“I knew you did.” She laughed before returning to my jeans. I closed my eyes for the last time, acting only with my body.