You're Not Alone.

*Lora's POV*

"Like ohhh my Gosh, she puts up with this?"

I looked around the bus as I walked on, everyone was on our bus and it was a complete mess. I sighed and picked up a beer bottle.

"Marie ALLOWS this?" I asked.

"Yep." Grant hiccuped.

I gave him a hard glare "You got her whipped."

"Isn't it the guy who get's whipped?" Brian asked as his girlfriend passed out on his shoulder.

"Depends on the situation." I crinkled my nose and looked around "I'm no prep, but really? People? This is gross.... OH!" I smiled and pointed at them all "You're making a mess 'cos she's gone. I see. Well, I'm going to bed and you all can clean this... seeing as I was working with James on a setlist for tomorrow night." I waved and skipped, quickly, towards my bunk. James, oh yes where do we start with him? Their new manager. The old one, Mark, was a perv. I'm glad they got rid of him. I wouldn't have agreed to tour if he was here. He used Marie back in the day for his sex thing... it was more than gross, I wanted to punch him but he threatened to drop their band if anyone messed with him.

I sat down with her millions of times and told her her body was worth more than the band, but this band had become her life after Eric killed himself. She wanted to do it for him, which is nice and cute and all, but she needed to understand that Eric would have made her quit if he knew. She wouldn't listen. She was in denial, for the first year, that he was even gone. It almost broke the band up. That bitch, Ali, would whine and complain that Marie was going crazy. I'm also very glad that they fired Ali, she was a good friend to Marie and the guys, but she didn't have completely... pure? Intentions.

She only became 'good' friends with them once they started playing bigger gigs. That's when she started to get cocky, and 'it's all about me' attitude. I could see it, because I wasn't sucked into her big black hole of friendship but no one else in the band could.

I sighed and crawled into the bunk, closing the curtain and shutting my light off. I pulled the blankets up to my chin and prayed that Marie was staying strong. Everyone knew this was the last time her Oma'd be sick, we all heard how bad she was the first time. I just wished I wasn't her fill in, I wanted to be there for her. But that's why I told Jello and Gabe she'd be back... she needed someone there for her. And they were the next best thing to me, from my perpective anyways.

~*~*~

"WAKE UP YOU LAZY BITCH!"

I groaned and held my head with both hands as a voice, familiar but not racognizable, screamed into my ear. Reflexivly, or at least that's what I'm sticking with, my fist made contact with something. There was a grunt and curses. I smiled sleepily and got up, swinging my legs out.

"God, you're meaner than Marie."

"Oh." I laughed and bit my lip as Matt leaned against the wall, holding onto his stomach.

"Grant wanted me to wake you up... That's why." He mumbled.

"Sorry..." I mumbled as he shook his head "Hey listen," I held my hand up and motioned for him to sit down. He looked at me hesitantly "Ok, I won't punch you. And she's my best friend, I wouldn't think of trying anything."

He smiled and sat down "Ok what's up?"

"How much do you know? I mean, what's she told you?" I asked, sitting to face him now. He just shrugged and stared at me.

"About what exactly?" He asked.

I looked at him with an unamused expression "Eric, her Oma, Mark, and her life." I listed off as he sighed.

"He commited suicide, she read me the note," I slightly gasped at this, but let him continue "Not much about her... Oma. I know that she slept with Mark once, he forced her. Then all I know is that she's from the East Coast and graduated culinary school but chose the band because it'd make Eric proud."

I nodded and looked down, piecing things together "She threw the knife?" I asked, he nodded "Oh cool. Way to go Marlee."

"The thing is," He paused and looked up at me "Corinne did that to Zack." He didn't even have to explain her, who didn't know? Of course I knew. If you knew who Avenged Sevenfold was over the past few years, you knew who Corinne Gavern was, and exactly how they lost her. Some held it against Matt, some didn't. I was one who was inbetween. And another reason I was on the fence about Marie dating him, but I wouldn't even think of doing something that'd cause her pain.

"I heard." I sighed "Listen... that isn't all of the truth." I looked up at him as his eyes showed confusion "Yah she's from the East Coast, yes she graduatedculinary school. Everything she told you is true, but it isn't everything."

"Listen, don't tell me something that she doesn't want me to know... I mean..." He struggled with his words for a minute "I don't want you to black mail her."

"I wouldn't. If I were to black mail anyone, it'd be Grant." I laughed as he nodded slowly "Eric wasn't just... How do I say this... Her boyfriend? They were engaged, the day was all planned and everything. She doesn't know that I found her suicide notes, and she doesn't know the reason Eric killed himself."

"And you do?" Matt asked "Then why are you telling me? You should tell Marie this..."

"No. Do you want her to go through with commiting suicide? Are you stupid?" I asked, tapping my head with my palm as I said it "Really? Do you know what that'd do to her? Do you want to know why he killed himself? Because he couldn't go through with marrying her, he was going to back out ok? He asked me how he should tell her, he didn't think he deserved her. He didn't want her regretting it later ok? He was going to break her heart and he didn't want to have to see her hurting." I stopped, tears rolling slowly down my face.

"What'd... what'd you tell him to do?" Matt asked slowly "You didn't-"

"NO!" I shouted "I didn't tell him to do this. I told him he should leave... get out of my goddamned house because I was so mad. My best friend was going to get married, she was overly happy. She was ecstatic. She couldn't stop talking about it, and the fact he thought she'd ever regret it, made me furious. He couldn't see how in love she was, and that she'd regret nothing more than not marrying the man she loved..."

"So... he killed himself, so he wouldn't have to watch her be upset he left her?" Matt asked. I nodded "So he loved her so much he left her?"

"Yes. I tried to tell her that Eric loved her, that he wanted her to be happy, but the first year she denied he was even gone. "

"Why are you telling me this? Shouldn't.... shouldn't you be trying to forget him saying all that? I mean... why do I need to know this?" He asked, squinting his eyes.

I sighed and stood up, shaking my head a little "Listen," I pointed at him "I know what you went through was hard ok? I'm not trying to be a bitch and bring it all up, to re-open a cut that's so deep it went clean through your heart. But there are three groups of people out there: The ones that blamed you, the ones that stood by you, and the ones on the fence. I'm on the fence." He just stared up at me, I could see the pain in his eyes. I bit my lip, closed my eyes, and took a few deep breaths before looking back at him "When Marie told me who she was with, I had all I could do to tell her to get the fuck off this tour."

"So you don't trust me." His eyes were angry, brimmed with tears, and I could see the pain in his eyes that I'd seen so many times in Marie's.

"It's hard to. I admit it. Being her best friend, I don't want to lose her because someone actually did have the lack of sense to break her heart. And I'm not going to sit back, like a group of stupid spineless bitches did, and watch you move onto the next girl while my best friend took her own life because she loved you ok? If you hurt Marie, if she does anything irrational because of you.." I pointed a finger at him as my eyes filled up with tears "I. Will. Kill. You. I don't understand how people can... can.. be best friends with the reason they lost their best friend. I'm sorry if that hurts, Matt, but I want you to know I won't sit back. You won't have it easy. So watch your back, make good decisions, and let her down easy." I sighed and began walking out. But Matt grabbed onto my arm. I looked over my shoulder at him, my heart aching as I saw a single tear running down his cheek. I wanted him to understand that I wasn't going to watch him live his life if she took her's.

"I don't want to let her down easy, Lora. I don't want to let her down at all. Do you think I could handle losing someone else to my own stupidity? No, I don't believe I could handle that. So don't worry, I learn the first time. And it fucking breaks me down every time, to know that because I was so blinde and stupid, that first error had to be Corinne's life. Ok? So before you go judging me and making me feel worthless all over again, just know that Marie's safe with me. And I took my share of shit from everyone and their mother about my mistakes. I don't need to hear it from you, too. You don't know me. You don't know the first thing about me." He let go of my hand and brushed past me, walking to the back lounge and slamming the door.

I sighed. "Well... at least he still likes her.." I took a deep breath and prepared to go face everyone and their questions as to why Matt was so upset now. Joy... rapture...