Suffocate

The granite counter top was cold against my skin as I rested my forehead against it. It had been a stressful day, and in my condition, there was no way that I could take any more. I felt sick, and wanted to go home. But my shift wasn't over for another hour and a half.

"Sarah?" A hand on my shoulder. "You feeling alright, girl?"

Ameila appeared into my distorted line of peripheral vision. Her messy head of black, curly hair piled onto the counter, and she frowned. I sat up, feeling nauseated. "Sarah! Get back to work!"

Raymond was tough, and you had to work sixty hours a week for him to even so much as acknowledge your existence. Or in my case, you had to have a physical condition.

Ameila frowned, and I got up off of bar stool, but instead of heading back into the dining room I went straight to the break room. My head was spinning, and everything was starting to blur. "Sarah, get your ass back -- oh."

I looked at Raymond, and fell back against the wall. Raymond was an older guy, probably in his early forties. He had piercing blue eyes, ones that you could feel when he looked at you. He flat out intimidated me.

Raymond stared at me. I stared back at him. "Don't just stand there and gawk at me, Ray," I begged, sliding down to the floor.

"Do you just want to go home? I can't have you vomiting all over the diner floor." He leaned against the door frame. "Go ahead and call Jacob. I'll give you a few days off until you feel better."

He left silently, and I stared after him, confused. I couldn't recall a time where Raymond had ever been so nice to me. After a moment, I pulled my cellphone out of my pocket. I couldn't bother to text him - that would take too long and I needed to get out of here.

"Hello?" Jacob's voice was gruff; I probably woke him up. Sam has been keeping the pack on a tight schedule. It seemed that they were always patrolling now. I couldn't remember the last time we had really had more than a few hours together.

"Hey, Jake," I whimpered into the phone. "Are you busy?"

"What's wrong? Did something happen?" He sounded frantic now. I sighed, and let my head fall back against the wall.

"No, I'm just sick. Ray's giving me a few days off." I picked at the hem of my apron, releasing a breath I hadn't realized I was holding.

"Did you throw up again?"

"Can you just come get me?" I whined. "I really --"

"Yeah, I'll be there in a second." He hung up without another word, and I sighed. The dining room was dead when I left the back room. Ameila and Daniel were sitting at the counter, munching on a tray of fries.

"Jeez, Sarah," Daniel said, "you look like you --"

"Shut up, Danny," I mumbled. The smell of all the food was overwhelming, but there was no way I could go outside - it was raining. "Yeah, I'm sick. I don't need everyone telling me that, because I know." This had been going on for about a month - I'd get nauseated at the smell of various types of food, or maybe I'd get really dizzy and stumble. I knew exactly what was going on; I would have to tell them eventually, but I wasn't ready yet.

Raymond came around the corner, holding a stack of plates. He looked at the three of us, and rolled his eyes. "You three are the laziest people I've ever met." He went through the double doors that led into the kitchen.

"We're on break, Ray," Ameila said casually, taking another bite of her fry. From the front window, I saw Jacob pull into a parking space near the door. I moved over to the computer so that I could clock out. "When are you coming back to work?" Ameila asked, pushing her hair out of her face.

"Whenever I'm not puking my guts out," I replied solemnly. And after this gets sorted out... Jacob came into the diner, and he met me halfway to the door. His hair was standing up in the back, and there was still some sleep in his eyes. The warmth that radiated off of his skin was comforting. I wrapped my arms around his waist and hugged him tightly, my face against his chest. He pressed his cheek against my head and rubbed my back.

"You alright?" He whispered, and I let go of him.

"I just want to go home."

He sighed, and we walked out to the car. "I told Sam you were feeling like shit and that you were coming home, so he gave me today and tomorrow off." I looked at him, not sure of how I was supposed to feel. "What?"

*

"Would you just talk to me, please?" Jacob begged, closing the space between us as we stepped onto the front porch of my house. I sighed, and looked at him. He looked exhausted, and upset. "You didn't say a word the whole way home and I know something is wrong, Sarah."

"I don't know if I want to talk about it right now." I placed my hand on his chest. He heaved a sigh, and kissed my forehead. "Can you come inside with me?" I asked.

Jacob smiled softly. "Sure."

Brenda was sitting on the couch when we went inside, and she looked at me with a worried look. "Oh, no, you didn't get fired did you?" I kicked off my shoes, sighing.

"I'm sick. Ray gave me a few days off."

"You sure Jake should be here then?" Brenda raised her eyebrow. Even though he might be the greatest person that I know, she still has a weird grudge against him. She might blame him for Liz's death, but she never talks about it and I don't like to push the subject.

"He'll be fine, Mom," I groaned, taking Jacob's hand. We climbed the stairs to my bedroom and I shut the door with a bit more force than normal. "She's so annoying sometimes."

Jacob sat on my bed, looking at me. "She just cares about you, that's all." I crossed my arms, and a small wave of nausea came over me. "Babe?"

I took a deep breath, and quickly sat down in my computer chair. "I'm fine," I said, but I think I was assuring myself more than him. "I'll be fine." It felt like nausea and guilt all mixed together, and it had to be the worst feeling I've ever had, besides the guilt and regret I felt after hurting Jacob.

"You look really pale," he said, kneeling in front of me and putting his giant hands on my knees. "Maybe you should lie down."

I put my forehead on his shoulder and whimpered. My head was spinning and I felt like I was going to throw up all over the bedroom. Jacob moved me over to my bed and I curled up into a ball, eyes closed. "Please stay," I whined, grabbing a fistful of his shirt. He sighed softly, and lay down beside me.

"I wasn't going anywhere," he whispered against my skin.

Oh, Jake, I need to tell you.