Glass Notebook

Sun poured in past the dirty window shades. The warm sun streaked the tan carpet, lighting the liquor stains and cigarette burns. Dusk danced in the beams of morning light, and settled onto the broken television. On the couch was a girl. She had blonde hair that sprawled over the cushions and fell towards the floor. Her breathing was even, calm. She wore a green shirt that was too small for her and loose fitting pants that had stains all over them. Draped over her sleeping form was a thin blanket. As a pillow, the girl used her diary.

Her eyes opened, and she looked at the window. She smiled and sat up. Her intense green eyes scanned the room, and her smile disappeared, her happy feelings leaving her just as soon as they’d formed. She was barely awake before the noises began.

“Mary, make me breakfast!” an ill-mannered man shouted from the kitchen.

“Can’t you pour yourself some cereal, Logan?” she asked, “I have to get ready for school,”

“Why don’t you stop being such a lazy whore and make me some damned breakfast?”

“Stop all that noise!” a female shouted.

Mary walked into the kitchen and looked at her mother’s boyfriend. He grinned, showing his unbrushed teeth, and then pointed at the dirty old stove. She assumed he wanted eggs.

“Eggs?” she asked.

“Yeah, whatever,” he grumbled, sitting back in the chair.

She walked to the refrigerator and grabbed two eggs. The pan was still in the sink, unwashed, but she grabbed it anyway. Logan wouldn’t notice, and Mary was in a rush. She turned the heat on and cracked the two eggs. Their snakelike sizzle filled the room, causing the rest of the family to wake up. Suddenly there were more demands for breakfast, coming from her mother and sisters. Mary didn’t protest. She cracked more eggs, leaving the broken shells on the counter.

“Good mornin,’ muffin,” Logan said when his oldest daughter, Rebecca, walked in.

“Morning, daddy.”

Rebecca sat down across from her father at the table and looked at Mary. She chuckled at Mary’s outfit. Rebecca’s red locks were combed nicely around her round face. She wore a jean skirt, a pink top, and too much makeup. Mary knew her other half sister, Katherine, would have on just as much makeup. She loved to copy her big sister.

“What is this?” Rebecca demanded as the plate of eggs was placed on the table, “I hate scrambled eggs!”

“Sorry, no time.”

Mary walked out of the kitchen, leaving the stunned Rebecca at the table with her father. She went to her bedroom, which she shared with Rebecca, and put on some real clothes. A baggy sweatshirt with tight fitting jeans. She pulled her long hair into a ponytail and went to the bathroom. She didn’t feel like walking to school today, so she needed to hurry or she’d miss the bus.

“Mom?” she knocked on the locked bathroom door, “Can I come in?”

There were some inaudible noises from behind the wood. Her mom had a hangover. Mary groaned and went back to the kitchen. She barely noticed eight year old Katherine wearing as much makeup and jewelry as she could, scarfing down her eggs. Mary opened a cupboard and took out baking soda. She would need to brush her teeth this way, instead of using the more conventional toothbrush and paste. She nodded to her family, and left the house.

She was glad that she didn’t miss the bus, but now she wished that she had remembered to grab a water bottle.

Mary didn’t mind school. Here she felt safe. Her sisters were both still in grade school and her mother wouldn’t show up here if the house burned down. At school, Mary knew people, Mary wasn’t hated. Teachers admired her kindness and adored her work ethic. The music teacher had even asked Mary to sing in the Winter Show, which she had agreed to do with a smile.

The Winter Show was a way to kick off the end of the first semester and show off the talent at the High School. There would be live bands, singing, some comedy. It was basically a talent show, except only people with real talents would perform. The show was later that night, so Mary planned on just staying after school and getting a ride home later.

Sitting in fourth period, Mary was called to the office. She wondered what it was, but didn’t think too much of it. Probably a teacher that wanted help with the show. There are no words to describe the shock from Mary when she saw her mother waiting for her.

“I need you at home,” her impatient mother barked.

“Oh, but I have a show tonight...”

“Family comes first, Mary,”

Mary sighed. In most cases that was true, family did come first. In the case of Mary’s family, she wasn’t so sure. Family comes first here means “shut up and do what I say, you’re just a kid.”

The big emergency was that Logan was passed out drunk, her mother needed to work, and the girls were hungry. Mary started to prepare a quick meal, something easy so she could start walking to school as soon as possible, but Rebecca stopped her.

“I don’t want noodles!” she complained.

“But you love pasta...”

“I want chicken tonight!”

“We don’t have...”

“Go out and buy some!”

Mary turned away from the stove and looked at the half sister. There was a grin upon her face that told her everything: Rebecca knew Mary had plans tonight and was just screwing with them. But of course, she got her jacket and backpack, took two twenties from her mother’s purse, and left for the store. Mary planned on just buying some chicken that was already cooked at the grocery store.

There were barely any lines at the grocery store. She smiled. Finally one for the good guy, Mary thought. She bought the chicken and rushed home. She didn’t care if Rebecca complained or not. This was the chicken she was getting.

When she got home, she found that Rebecca had finished cooking the pasta, and she was eating it happily with Katherine. Rebecca looked at the heartbroken Mary and giggled.

“I forgot to tell you, Kathy wanted noodles,”

Mary dropped the chicken on the floor and ran from the house, leaving the laughter behind her. At first she ran, but after a few blocks, her pace slowed. It was a cold December day, and it was already getting dark.

She heard a honk and looked back. There was a familiar red van pulling up beside her. Nicholas, her best friend, smiled from the front seat. His mother offered a warm hello.

“Need a ride?”

Mary couldn’t thank them enough as they drove her to the school. She sat in the seat behind Nicholas and threw her backpack down, sighing with relief.

“Couldn’t your mom drive you?” Nicholas’ mother asked.

“Oh... she was busy,” Mary told her, “I don’t mind walking. I just lost track of the time,”

They arrived at the school, and Mary was out of the car before it was stopped. She yelled thanks to Nicholas and ran into the school. The show had already started. She wasn’t dressed for it and she was out of breath. Backstage, her music teacher looked at her and shook her head in disappointment, then pointed at the drama room. Mary got the hint, and went to look for a change of clothes before she went on.

Nicholas and his mom found their seats in the auditorium , upset that they had already missed the first two performances, but glad they hadn’t missed Mary. She came on right after a soft rock band. The stage lights went off, and then a spotlight was pointed at the girl center stage. She wore a long white gown that sparkled in the light. Her hair was pulled back in a messy ponytail. Nicholas chuckled to see she was barefooted. Mary brought the microphone to her mouth and began to sing.

The rest of the night, Nicholas could think of nothing but Mary. Her voice was so melodic and soft. Had she always been so pretty? When the show ended, Nicholas searched for her, but she was nowhere to be found. Their music teacher said that she left right after her song.

The drive home, Nicholas found Mary’s backpack in the back seat. He picked it up, and out fell a little black diary. From the page it fell open to, he could read “I need help.” Nicholas scanned through the pages, and later that night showed his mom.

When Mary got home she got yelled at by all four of her family members. Her mother yelled because Mary made such a mess. Rebecca yelled because she had been forced to make her own supper. Katherine yelled simply to yell, and Logan yelled because he was drunk. Mary stood there, trying not to cry, and apologizing.

There was a knock at the door. Mary hid in the kitchen, and her mother answered the door. From the kitchen, Mary could hear everything.

“Ma’am, police,” said a tall man, holding out his badge, “We’re here because of a tip that there was child abuse here,”

“That’s silly. Here are my girls, and they’re fine,”

“And which one is Mary?”

“I don’t have a daughter named Mary.”

“Yes you do!”

Mary ran from the kitchen and past her mother, drunk step father, spoiled half sisters, and into the arms of the police officer.

The police searched the house. They found beer bottles scattered everywhere. There were drugs hidden in the master bedroom, that both of Mary’s parents denied knowing about. The condition of the house was atrocious. It was dirty and falling apart. The cleanest part of the house was the bedroom Mary and Rebecca shared, and it certainly wasn’t because of Rebecca.

Mary was taken from the care of her mother. She watched her house from the backseat of the police car until she could no longer see it. She was crying, and also smiling. She was brought to a foster family in another province. The only thing she kept from her old life was her little black notebook.