Out

Kurt hasn't shut up about Jennifer since I told him about Friday night and Saturday morning. Not that it really bugs me or anything. But I hate it for her sake alone when he talks about it at school. Much like he's doing now.

"So Ms. Superficial's a dyke?," he asks enthusiastically while I look around the lunchroom looking for Jennifer to show up.

"Yeah. Why does this matter so much to you? I know you don't like her but you don't have to make jokes about her.," I think of saying something else until Jennifer finally walks over to our table. She's smiling so she either told Scott off or she hasn't said anything to him but I make her perky.

"Hey Billy. So Kurt, how's it going?," she asks Kurt as she kind of plops down beside him. I can tell she's messing with him, especially after she laughs when he moves over several spaces.

"What are you here? That asshole of a boyfriend you have decide to let you go today?," Kurt asks her almost growling every word. Not that I don't disagree with what he said. I'm actually wondering the same thing.

"No. Actually Scott and I broke up.," she smiles.

"Why?," I ask her. Although I kind of already have a hunch on what it is. I still have no memory of how Jen and I got in bed together and I am still trying to erase waking up with her from my memory. Do I regret it? No, I love her....its just....I don't know.

"I told him about you. Sure he was pissed but I don't really care. I also think I have finally gotten my mother to understand me. So I guess we're together...I mean if you want us to be.," she says in a quiet excited, yet awkward tone. I gesture Kurt away. He sighs but reluctantly goes over to another table.

"Sure. I'd love that." We're about to kiss when the bell rings and it finally occurs to us that we are not in the movie theater anymore.

"Hey Rainbow Parade, lunch is over. C'mon Billy let's go. You and your girlfriend can get it on later.," Kurt says tapping my shoulder as the bell rings. I think of saying something but figure that Kurt's already got enough mess to tease me for the next 20 years.

++++++++

Its amazing, on the one day that I feel up for what Ms. Vang will say to me, we have a sub. I can just look at this person and now that I'd rather have Ms. Vang asking me what took me so long to get to her class.

"Hello Ms....," the sub pauses down to focus on the attendance sheet, "Well it looks like it doesn't have your last name on here. I guess I'll have to notify the prin-"

"No ma'am, Joan is my last name. If that's what's stumping you.," I interrupt her. Her face quickly reddens.

"Oh sorry for the confusion, Ms. Joan.," she apologizes but I don't mind. Like I said earlier, I'm used to this kind of mess.

"Don't worry its cool. It happens a lot." Okay by now I'm trying to get the focus off of me as soon as possible. She smiles, laughs, and turns towards the blackboard. Okay part of me says that she just might be the worst sub ever-not for the last name incident though-the other says that she probably just got out of college and is still new to the whole teaching world. Now I feel sorry for her.

About halfway through class some guy that used to be pretty good friends with Kurt hands me a slip a paper. Word is that you're a dyke it says. Why am I not offended by this? If anything I'm tiffed that he would have the guts to write this down and give it to me. Like the world's safety is rested on my sexuality. I pass the note back to him. Throw it cruelly at him, if you want to be technical.

"Geez Joan, there is no reason to hate me.," he shouts. Obviously I must've given him some kind of eye paper cut if he's actually saying something to me while holding his eye.

"Jeff, can you just shut it? Billy won't doing nothing to you. Just because she's friends with Kurt doesn't mean she deserves to die because of it.," one of his friends pokes at him. I don't know this guy but my opinion of him has already gone up. He insists that Jeff apologizes to me but of course, I don't sweat it.
On the bright side, its made some of the class go by faster. I got a couple of classes after this but those don't really bug me much. I just want to see Jennifer so we can take up where we left off at lunch. I almost break out into a sweat at the thought.

++++++++

"Did you miss me as much as I missed you?," she says to me holding onto me tightly. Its a different tight than the one where she fused me out by her car a few days ago. This tight is warm. I almost want to melt in her arms.

"Geez Jen it was only a couple of hours.," I tease her. She smiles and starts to loosen her grip on me.

"So you didn't miss me?," she smiles trying her hardest to even slightly look like she's sad.

"Of course I did. Now hey you want to continue where we left off tonight at my place? I was going to wait 'til Christmas so that I'd have a good reason to go out and buy you a gift. My parents are having a dinner party in honor of some house finally getting off the market. Plus I think my parents would love to talk to you considering how we darted out the door together.," I smile at her. I look at her and realize that it must be something if her hair can sweetly glisten in the sunlight even when there isn't a speck of sun in the sky.

"Sure. I'd love to. I'll meet you there. If I don't get there in an hour, you have my phone number on speed dial right?," she asks me and I nod.

++++++++++

She comes to my house a few minutes after I get there, so I guess things went pretty smooth. My parents seemed a little surprised when they saw me bring another girl home. Apparently they think that either Kurt is my only friend or just for me to acknowledge a person of the same sex was an even bigger miracle than automated toilets.

"Mom, Dad, there's a reason why Jennifer's here.," I say about halfway through dinner. My throat hurts again. It hasn't hurt this bad since I met Jennifer.

"Don't worry, honey. We don't mind you having a friend over. In fact its kind of nice to see someone other than Kurt for a change.," my mother says. Its like she's a whole new person now that that house finally sold.

"Actually we're more than that.," I sigh heavily, "Mom, Dad, I brought Jennifer here because she's my girlfriend." My dad's face is hard as stone. My mom is doing that kind of giggling she does when she's in a nervous, awkward shock.

"So that means you....are.......," my mom tries to get the sentence out. Thankfully I'm in the same awkward fuzz and know exactly what to say.

"Yes Mom, I'm gay. And if you don't mind Jennifer and I are going to go to my bedroom. Our homework is already done and I don't think Jen's parents would care one way or another if she stayed here for the night." Now the whole room is silent and wide eyed. My parents and Jen look so stunned I wouldn't be surprised if they all passed out.

+++++++++

"I can't believe you did that!," she laughs sitting on my bed, "So you want to take it to the next level? Man, I almost feel like I'm with Angel again. Hey, you want me to keep my clothes on or what?" I know what she wants to do. I want to do it too. Slowly I begin to crawl onto my bed. I feel the dirtiest I've ever felt in my life but I don't care.

Our bodies are aligned now. Our barely clothed bodies. I can feel the heat coming from Jennifer. Never did I think I'd lose my virginity to another girl. Let alone Jen. Oddly she acts like she's done this before. She probably has.

"Oh my god. That was unlike anything I've ever done before.," I say trying to catch my breath. Part of me is scared, yet the other part is excited out of my mind.

"Its really something after you've done it with a few other women. Wow." Her eyes are almost as huge as mine but they're probably huge in a different way. "Not bad considering it was your first time." I start to say something else to Jen until it hits me just what we're talking about.

"And all of this was taking up from lunch? Wow!," I laugh, "Well Jen, its probably late and we should be in bed. Hopefully tomorrow when I wake up with you beside me I'll actually remember it. G'night."

Its official now, I want to spend the rest of my life say "G'Night" to Jen. I love her and its really nice to know that she feels the same way about me. I think I might just die from excitement. After tonight, I very feasibly could.