I Just Had to Lick the Cookie, Didn't I?

I've been hiding in this bed for weeks from this
Throats raw from screaming and I haven't said a word
The sky is calling, and the stars, they point to this
To a chair we see your breath in the air (breath in the air)
but only for a little while
Your cold pale skin and tainted purple lips
Let me embrace you with this kiss
And together we'll float like angels
Together... together we will float like angels
Higher than the heavens the clouds part ways
"Promise me to never look down!", and we'll stay like this forever
If your stomach feels weak, then my work here is done
To hide from our twisted ways,
I've been hiding in this bed
Been hiding in this bed for weeks

---------

"The world is on crack, Leo. You're lucky you're a dog and you don't have to worry about this stuff," I told my faithful companion. He just watched me with his big brown eyes and cocked his head to the side the way all adorable dogs do.

The sun was still setting and all of a sudden the city burst out into a giant light fest. I knew they were having electrical problems, but I didn't see why they had to blind me.

I groaned and covered my eyes to shield them from the bright city lights.

"I hate life," I groaned and let myself slide onto my back. Park benches weren't exactly my bed of choice, but when you're basically homeless, what are you going to do?

That's right, I was considering myself as good as homeless. My parents were divorced and I hated them anyway, and I had just abandoned my brother because he was a worthless jerk.

Leo started to growl about an hour later. I fluttered my eyes open and was met with the daunting view of a jet black sky.

"Leo, hush," I told him. He was quiet for all of two seconds before his growling escaladed into barking. Frustrated, I sat up and glared at him. Leo continued to bark and then he was accompanied by another barking animal. At first I was afraid it was some sort of evil wild animal, but then I realized that even if it was, I'd gotten over that fear three summers ago.

"Shush," a human voice scolded the other animal. It was getting closer. I couldn't see very well because the lights were ALL OFF. Damn the city and its electrical issues...

Out of sheer chance, I noticed that Leo's tail was wagging furiously and his bark was more of a happy playful one, almost as if he knew who was coming. For a second, my heart started beating faster and my stomach filled with butterflies, but then I realized that Milo wouldn't be walking Fox this late.

"Hello?" I called out. Leo barked again and I grabbed his collar so he wouldn't go running after the nearing dog and its owner.

"Yes?" the voice replied. It was even closer now, and it sounded familiar...

Right then, the city lights flashed on again. This time I was prepared and covered my eyes before they could be temporarily blinded. Once I grew accustomed to the lights, I blinked and scanned the pathway for whoever had been walking.

"Oh my god," a voice said. "Oh my god," it laughed. "I--I can't believe this. Holy crap, I think I'm going to cry."

Leo barked again and I decided to let him go. He ran a few feet away and then started jumping all over another dog. A black dog.

My eyes slowly looked up and at the face of the person walking Fox. I nearly burst into sobs, but instead I just let myself cry and laugh at the same time.

"Adriaan!" Gary shouted, dropped Fox's leash and ran at me. He jumped on top of me and squeezed me tighter than I could bear. "Thank GOD I found you!" he yelled, kissing my head a million times. "This has to be a miracle."

I laughed and kept crying. The feeling was so far away. I couldn't quite accept that I was so close to Milo yet. I was so, so close, and yet so far away...

"Oh sweet Heaven above, you're coming home with me. Right now. Right this instant, no matter what you try and say, I'll drag you... I'm not even making any sense!" Gary laughed and pulled me up off of the bench with him. I smiled and jumped on top of him. He caught me as I wrapped my arms and legs around his body.

We stayed in each other's arms for a few minutes, just soaking up the feeling of being back with one another. I couldn't help but wonder what it would feel like to see Milo again. If I was this excited about Gary, what would it be like when I saw him?

"Let's go," he whispered and let me down. I wiped my eyes on my arm and smiled. The feelings I felt could only be described as bliss. True bliss.

Gary picked up Fox's leash and then started to run. Leo followed immediately, but I stood and watched. I'd already run for hours earlier, my legs couldn't take anymore.

"Gary!" I shouted. He stopped and turned around. He looked frustrated.

"Adriaan, this is practically life or death, let's go!" I pouted. "FINE!" he yelled and then stomped over to me. I jumped on his back and he practically collapsed. "Either you're a cow, or I'm weaker than Jell-O." I laughed as Gary started to run again.

The funniest thing was that Gary was staying at the Ritz-Carlton, the hotel I'd been staring at the entire time I was in Central Park. Inside, he let me down and then dragged me into some back room with a private elevator. There, he pushed me in and once the dogs were in and the doors were closed, he whipped out his cell phone.

"Lillian, I have an emergency," he said. "Give me a second." Gary tapped my shoulder to get my attention. "What perfume do you wear?" he asked me in a whisper.

I thought for a second. 'The same stuff you gave me."

"Okay, Lillian, I need hair number ten, body six, perfume two and a beauty kit. ASAP... Wonderful, thank you."

Gary shut his phone and shoved it in his pocket.

"What's going on?" I dared to ask. Gary smiled evilly at me.

"We're going back to my room. You're going to take a shower and do whatever, and then I'm getting you dressed and ready. My whole new line is really sexy and glamorous, you'll look fabulous. And Milo will love it... I designed it with you in mind you know. I was actually going to ask you something. I wanted to know if you'd be interested in modeling for me," Gary told me as the elevator doors opened.

His eyes widened for a second and he pushed me over to the side, away from the opening of the elevator. He pushed Leo over with his foot and I grabbed a hold of my dog's collar.

"What are you doing?" a voice asked suspiciously. I gulped, I knew who it was and it was killing me to not jump out and wrap my arms around him.

"Oh, nothing. I just was getting back from the park," Gary said casually and stepped out of the elevator with Fox.

"Okay then... I'm going to bed," Milo told Gary glumly.

"Hold on, did you eat anything?" Gary asked. Milo laughed and I felt my knees go weak at the sound, even if it was meant to mock his friend.

"No."

"Damn it Maelogan!" Gary shouted.

There were footsteps followed by a slamming door. Gary groaned.

"You can come out now. I want you to be a surprise, then maybe he'll start being happy again."

I stepped out of the elevator to see a very disheartened Gary. He sighed and then led me to a door.

"Let's go, the sooner he's happy, the sooner you're happy, right? And the sooner everyone else is happy, I can finally stop feeling so pressured."

Gary opened the door and let Fox off of his leash. The dog ran in and was followed by Leo. They started to play as Gary closed the door when we both had entered. Not two minutes later, there was a knock on the door. When Gary opened it, there was this very high-fashioned looking woman holding two brief cases in her arms rather than at her sides.

"The top one's all of your requests and the bottom's the beauty kit," she informed Gary. My friend nodded and took the cases from her. She left and Gary closed the door.

"Let's get this party started!" he squealed and ran over to his perfectly made bed. He opened the two brief cases. "Come here," he ordered. I did as he said and was handed a bunch of stuff. "Now go shower, and do it fast."

I ran to the bathroom and set down everything on the counter. Gary had successfully gotten a hold of every single thing I used regularly to care for myself. There were small bottles of my shampoo and conditioner, a small bottle of my body soap and even the exact same razor I used.

Quickly, I stripped and brought all of the personal care products into the shower with me. Fifteen minutes later, I was soaking wet and clean. As if my life depended on it, I dried myself as quickly as I could and then raced out of the bathroom.

"Great. Here. Take these." Gary handed me a pile of clothes. I took them and then ordered him to turn around with a twist of my finger. "You know, I don't see why you're uncomfortable with me. Adriaan, I'm gay, not a pervert."

I laughed as I slid on the underwear he'd given me.

"It still bothers me when I know people are watching," I told him, dropping my towel and putting on the expensive-looking bra.

"So if you didn't know someone was watching, you wouldn't care?" he asked.

"No, not really... I'm done."

Gary laughed and turned around. I was holding up the babydoll thing he'd given me to put on and staring at it oddly.

"What are you waiting for? Put it on!" he demanded. I shook my head.

"If I put this on, I'll look like a prostitute."

"Adriaan, you could never look like a prostitute. They're tacky, you're not. And besides, prostitutes are little meatier," he informed me, leaning forward and poking my ribs.

"Gary, this would make me feel awkward. Milo and I... I mean, we don't... We've never..." I struggled to find the right words.

"Oh," he said knowingly. "Here, I have just the thing." He took the babydoll from me and walked off to find something. "Aha! Found it!" he announced and then ran back over to me. I was given a pile of black cloth. It took me a minute, but then I realized it was a tee-shirt. When I held it up, I nearly squealed. I'd wanted that shirt for over six months.

"I love you!" I said and immediately pulled the shirt over my head.

"Hey, look, that's not mine. That's Milo's. He threw it at me two weeks ago and I never gave it back. Do you honestly think I would ever wear that?" he asked, but he didn't want an answer.

After I found out that it was Milo's shirt, I smelled him. It smelled just like I remembered.

"Now let me take care of that mess of hair..." My eyes widened as Gary shoved me to the ground and then attacked me with an armada of hair tools.

Thirty minutes later he was done. He pulled me up off of the ground and pushed me all the way to the door. Gary came out into the hallway with me and pointed to another door.

"That one's his. Here's the key. Now go." With one last push, Gary retreated back to his own room as I stumbled toward Milo's.

My heart was pounding and it was getting harder and harder to breathe. It felt like eighty tons had been set on my chest and I was suffocating. Not to mention I was walking through a hallway in a hotel wearing nothing but underwear and a tee-shirt. Basically you could see my butt, and I wasn't exactly comfortable with random strangers seeing that.

I scanned the hallway quickly before scurrying over to Milo's door. My hands were sweating and it was almost like I could hear my heart beating out of my chest. This time, I was so, so close and I was only going to get closer. He was behind the door in front of me, all I had to do was go in and nothing was going to stop me.

The light on the door handle thing turned green after I put the key in and pulled it out. I took a deep breath and tried my hardest to keep a straight face as I opened the door. When it closed behind me, I dropped the key to the floor in the dark room and smiled wider than I had in years. It was too hard to resist, so I did a small dance. All of the waiting was finally over.

At long last, I was in the same room as Milo again and I couldn't have been happier. The dark room smelled just like him. It was quiet and for a moment I wasn't sure if he was even in there.

"Gary? What the hell? Go away," he ordered angrily. My heart dropped. He sounded upset. My mind flooded with thoughts that pulled my good mood down. What if he didn't want to see me again? That couldn't be true, but why would he be so angry? Maybe I shouldn't have come right then...

Tears started to well up in my eyes. After all of that time, I was having second thoughts, but I knew I couldn't give up. If I didn't do something, I would never have the chance again. So, I took a deep breath and wiped my eyes.

Slowly, but surely, I walked over to the bed I knew was there, making as little noise as I could. There was a faint light from the moon seeping through a crack between the heavy curtains. It was enough so that I was hidden, but I could see the edge of the messy bed. As I got closer, my heart started to race even faster. At one point I was sure Milo could hear it.

Once I reached the edge of the bed, I quickly pulled the crack in the curtains shut and then carefully climbed on. Milo groaned and smacked his hand down on the mattress.

"What the fuck are you doing?" he demanded. I took another deep breath and let myself lie down on my side. "Seriously, what the hell? I don't want to talk to you."

I blinked back my tears and tried to breathe as normally as possible. Milo shifted around on his sheets and then let out an angry growl. A little bit hesitantly, I slid one of my hands over top of the sheets in search of any part of him. The first thing I came in contact with was his hand.

"Gary?" he inquired cautiously. I took hold of his hand and just held it for a second, taking in the feeling, before lacing my fingers with his. "Gary, I swear to God..." Milo said uncomfortably, like he was feeling strained in some way.

"No," I choked. "I'm not Gary." The tears I had been holding back let themselves free and I started crying.

"Who..." he started. "Adriaan?" he asked quietly, as if he was afraid of the answer.

"Yes." Milo gasped and then my entire body was taken a hold of and enveloped into a bone-shattering hug. My face was pressed into his bare chest and his arms were squeezing the life out of me. He loosened his grip after a few moments and then I heard him start to cry.

"I--I... I don't know what to say!" he choked out and laughed. "Oh God, I feel like such an idiot. I'm sorry I didn't come and find you. I'm sorry I was an asshole. I'm sorry I did the things I did, and most of all I'm sorry that all of my mistakes made you suffer."

"I forgive you," I told him, pressing my cheek into his chest.

"Don't. I don't deserve it, at least not yet. I haven't even forgiven myself."

"That's stupid. I could care less about it to be honest because it brought me...well... Fuck it. It brought me closer to you and I could care less that that's probably the cheesiest thing I've ever said." Milo laughed at my declaration.

"So you're saying that what I did was a good thing?" he questioned unsurely.

"Well, in a way, but if you ever do it again I'll make sure to kick you're a_s in as many ways I know how."

"You know what? I need to ask you something... Did you happen to see that coverage of Gary's Valentine's party?" he asked out of the blue. I nodded.

"Yep, and it made me cry. And it also made my brother realize that he had been a selfish jerk. AND it brought me to Gary, who brought me here. So, that coverage works miracles."

"That was yesterday," Milo stated.

"Yes, it was," I laughed.

"I still feel the same way you know. I still love you. I mean it, I really do. I love you more than I think you could ever know."

"Oh, trust me, I know. I know damn well how you feel. You didn't die and therefore, I love you too."

"Good, because if you didn't I'd be heart broken. But, since you do, there's just one thing I need say. Or ask. Same thing."

"Shoot," I prompted, snuggling closer to him with the biggest grin on my face.

"Would you like this in question form, or statement form?" he inquired.

"Do I look like I care?" I asked him impatiently. He laughed.

"Considering I can't see you, I wouldn't know." I kicked his shin and he chuckled. "Fine. I wanted to know if, well... I wanted to know if you still wanted to, um... God this is awkward..."

"Spit it out already! Put it in question form and spit it out!"

"Willyoumarryme?" he exhaled quicker than I could comprehend. Almost. I practically stopped breathing when I understood what he'd said. "I know that we really don't have to anymore, and that it's really early in out actual relationship, but I feel like we---"

"Duh."

"What?" he asked dumbly.

"I said: duh. Duh, as in, yes because I'm not stupid and I know that I love you."

Milo laughed joyously for a moment before he moved out from behind me and then somehow managed to take hold of both of my hands in the dark.

"Thank you," he whispered. His face was getting closer to my own, I could feel it. "I'm going to kiss you now." I laughed and smiled as happily as I ever had.

And then he did.