Hunt

I walked around the living room, thinking of ways to explain myself to LynZ if she didn't understand why I was breaking things off before they'd even started. Would she understand? Would she hear me out and not ask questions? I didn't just want to tell her that I was falling for someone else. Is she homophobic? What if I told her I'd liked this guy for awhile and then he finally asked me out and I couldn't help but say yes? No, that would technically mean I cheated on her and that could blow up in my face. What if I said that things just couldn't work out and that was what I left it at? No, I can't do that to her, she deserves an explanation.

So I continued to pace around the apartment. "Gee, baby, you're making me nervous." Frankie said to me as I passed the couch he was on with our boyfriend Mikey once again.
"I'm sorry, Frankie-bear. I'm nervous myself."
"Maybe you should take a walk." Mikey suggested.
"Maybe I will hun." I agreed. Nan, my grandmother, always told me to take a walk if I was nervous, it would calm me down and help me think. She was always right.

What am I supposed to do? I really think I like LynZ, but I have Mikes and Frankie and I love them more. Jesus, love was more confusing then homophobia. What would I do to prove that everything was alright, and I didn't hate LynZ, without saying I was dating not only one boy, but two, one being my brother. That wouldn't turn out well. I went to the bar, not to get drunk, or even drink, but to ask Joe for advice. His shift didn't start until 4, but he was always there from 12 to until his shift was over. I walked inside the hot bar and found Joe.

"Hey Gerard, how are you? I haven't seen you around since Halloween." Joe greeted.
"I'm fine, Joe, I need your advice. Want to take a walk?"
"Sure." He agreed. "Guys, I'll be back around 3 or so!" He yelled back. I smiled. Joe would drop many things for me.
"What's up?" He asked as we left.
"Well, I got Mikey and Frankie, but first I got this girl to pass the time and she's a sexy nurse who I think I'm falling for, but don't trust enough to tell her the whole truth. What should I tell her?"
"Well, I suppose that you should do whatever your gut tells you to do. What does it tell you to do?"
"Avoid her at all costs and hope you never see her again."
"Never mind that, Gerard. She needs some explanation."
"I know."
"What does your mind tell you?"
"To leave her."
"What about your heart?"
"To stay with her."
"Well, I'd go with the heart. Whatever the heart wants, that's what you need."
"But what about Frank and Mikes?"
"I suppose that you'll have to pick. I'll say, Gerard, LynZ sounds like a better pick."
"Thanks Joe." He left me to go back to work as I headed over to Starbucks.

I never knew something like this would be so hard. Saying goodbye to LynZ would be very hard. I walked into Starbucks. "Hey Gerard." She said. That's when she noticed the frown I wore on my face. "What's wrong?"
"I don't," I started. "know. I mean, I have a pretty girl at my favorite coffee shop, what's to be sad about?"