Love in Theory and Practice: Chapters 1-13

London, England

I wrap up the meeting and begin to pack my bag. Nils gets up from his chair on the other side of the room and slowly makes his way towards me. I pretend that I don’t see him but he positions himself so that I cannot get out of the office.

“Elin, we need to talk.” He says seriously. My feet are aching from being in heels all-day and walking from meeting to meeting and standing around talking with executives. All I want to do is go eat with my dad and head back to the hotel for a hot bath.

“If it’s something you couldn’t bring up during the meeting, Nils, then I don’t want to hear it.” I say calmly. I pull my phone out of my pocket and reply to a text from Ville.

“I don’t want you to marry that guy.” He blurts out. I have to admit that I’d been expecting something like this from him but I had expected a more professional delivery.

“That’s too bad.” I say with a smile. Poor Nils.

“I don’t think he’s right for you.” He leans up against the wall of the office but continues to block my path. I’m exhausted and I really don’t feel like having this conversation with him.

“Why’s that?” I ask, replying to another text from Ville. They’re in Atlantic City and Bam and his family came out for the show. Callie is there as well. I wish I could have been there but I had promised my father to help with these meetings. He’s forming a contractual business agreement with a company here in London.

“He’s too strange.” Nils says moodily. One thing about Nils, when he’s upset about something his features melt into an unattractive version of his usual features. He pouts and he looks sulky. It’s something I always hated about him.

I say nothing. I just start laughing. “He’s too strange? Nils I don’t even know what you mean.” I manage to choke out through my laughter.

“Well he’s all goth and freaky.” Nils says.

“Oh Nils, honestly. If this is your pitiful attempt to break up my relationship, it’s failing. Epically failing. I love Ville for who he is. There’s nothing strange or freaky about him in my eyes.” I say. If he thinks Ville is strange and freaky, well then I must be strange and freaky too, seeing as Ville and I have so much in common.

“Elin, are you coming to dinner?” Pappa asks, poking his head into the office.

“Yes Pappa. Just as soon as Nils gets out of my way.” I say with a snort of laughter. Nils immediately moves and allows me to pass.

“What was that all about?” Pappa asks as we walk towards the elevators. I link my arm with my father’s and lean my head on his arm.

“Nils thinks Ville is too strange and freaky for me.” I say with a smile.

“What does he know?” Pappa laughs. “All he knows about is corporate law.”

“My point exactly.” I say.

Pappa and I have dinner together in a small restaurant near our hotel. I’m flying out early in the morning to make it to New York in time for Ville’s show and I have to pick up his mother. Callie agreed to pick up Mrs. Valo if my flight is late.

“So how are the wedding plans coming along?” he asks over dinner.

“Excellent! I’ve already worked it out with a party company in Stockholm to get everything we need for the ceremony and reception, I’ve booked a caterer, Ville already has his clothes, my dress appointment is tomorrow. Invitations are sent.” I list off quickly. My father smiles but it’s pained.

“I wish your mother was here for this.” He says sadly. I reach across the table and grab his hand.

“So do I.” I say quietly. “I feel like she’ll be there as long as all of us are present. I can always remember her perfectly when I’m with you, Isak and Bo.” I say. He smiles again.

“But not Lisbeth?” he jokes. “Maybe she’ll go with you to pick out a dress.”

“Oh Pappa, that’s not funny.” I groan. I’ve been in constant contact with my brothers since Christmas but I’ve only spoken to my sister long enough to make sure she and her family were okay. When I told her I got engaged, she was cold and snotty but either way she’s invited to the wedding.

Both of my brothers are ecstatic that I’m getting married. And they’re even happier that it’s Ville Valo. They’ve already harassed me about if I’m going to change my name. It actually ended up being something I hadn’t thought about so Ville and I talked about it and I’m going to change my name to: Elin-Märta Blix Valo.

Pappa and I make conversation through dinner and all the way back to the hotel. I kiss my father good bye and the door to my room and promise to call when I get to NYC. I’m leaving early in the morning but Pappa will already be in meetings.

“I’m so happy for you. He’s a great man and I know you’re going to have a wonderful life together, Elin-Märta Blix Valo.” Pappa says with a smile before heading off to his own room.

I step into my room and peel off my clothes. I slip into a hot bath and allow my muscles and mind to relax. One thing I’ve been able to work on since taking time off from working is clearing my mind. I am now able to relax and think about nothing. It’s been wonderful.

When I’m in bed, I think about what he said. I really do believe that Ville and I are going to have a great life together. We’ve discussed having a family and have decided that we want to start trying after the wedding. Since I’ll be working and living in Helsinki it’ll be a good time to have a baby. He’ll be home working on new material and won’t be recording or touring for at least a year and a half.

I think Ville is nervous about having a family but I can already see in him the qualities I’ve always wanted in the father of my children. He’s patient, understanding, and caring. He isn’t quick to anger, he likes to read a loud and he gets along well with children. He’s willing to carry, to give piggyback rides, to spend all day walking around the park.

I know he’ll be wonderful.

And me, well I just have to get over my selfish personality to make room in my life for a baby. Pappa thinks I’ll just naturally come into it like my mother did. He said that before Isak she was just like me but after she had him she went immediately into mother mode.

I twirl the ring on my finger while I think about the wedding plans. I have just about everything settled. Callie and Jason are my bridal party and Mige and Linde are Ville’s groomsmen. Burton and Gas said they were more than happy to come only as guests. Seeing as how Mige, Linde and Burton have been friends for nearly 20 years, it just makes sense.

Callie will be choosing a bridesmaid dress while we’re in New York. Jason, Linde and Mige will have suits similar to Ville’s.

Ville and I decided that we aren’t going to have specific colors for our wedding. It’s going to be simple and summer inspired. Even though Ville hates to be too hot, summer on the island is colorful, fresh and breezy.

Since the ceremony will be at 4:00, we’re planning on having the reception around 6:00. Even though the sun doesn’t set in Sweden in the summer, we’re far enough south that it will get dim as the evening progresses.

Just before I fall asleep I receive a text from Ville telling me that he loves me and can’t wait to see me in New York. I reply that I love him and that I’ll call him as soon as I land.

With that I’m asleep. My alarm is set for 5:00am and my flight leaves at 8:00am. My bags are packed. Tomorrow I’ll be back with Ville in New York City and I’ll be looking for a wedding dress with Callie and his mom.

I still need to find Ville a new ring for the wedding. We decided to get new rings for the ceremony, just to make it extra official.

I fall asleep and dream of wedding bands.