Stories from the Back of His Motorcycle

“Katerina?” he furrowed his eyebrows and shifted his gaze.

“Yes, Katerina.”

I wasn’t going to let him wriggle free of this, now that the words were out of my mouth I found I needed the answer more than I had realised. Everything suddenly relied upon this. Everything Cassidy had said was abruptly very real, with the capacity for being the truth. And by the look on Vaughn’s face Katerina definitely wasn’t a topic he was very enthusiastic to discuss.

“Who told you about her?”

“There has to be a trigger for this question? I can’t just be curious?”

He narrowed his eyes at me suspiciously, giving me the answer to that particular question.

“So what if someone said something about her? Really, it’s perfectly natural for a girl to want to know about her boyfriend’s ex. You’ve certainly never spoken about her freely.”

“Maybe there’s a good reason for that Alice,” he sighed, lowering his body gently onto the motorcycle and focusing his intense gaze onto the tarmac. And then there was guilt, attacking me, eating me from the inside. Why did I have to be so insensitive? Of course Cassidy Blockwood was talking shit and his relationship with Katerina was perfectly normal and non-threatening.

“I’m sorry,” I sighed “I shouldn’t let these things get to me.”

“I understand, like you said it’s natural,” he shrugged “I checked out if you had any ex-boyfriends too.”

“You did?”

“Yeah, when I knew that I definitely liked you and wanted to make you a part of my life I did a little detective work. There was John Fareham at the tenth grade dance; there was David Grey who you dated for a few weeks in ninth grade, and Ben Hunt who was your boyfriend for a day in middle school.”

I blinked at him, confused at how he knew these things and why he’d want to know them. It wasn’t like he ever had any competition for me; I was just Alice Thornberry, nobody particularly special. He, on the other hand, was someone extra special and ex girlfriends weren’t the only competition I needed to worry about.

“Why?” I voiced my question.

“I needed to know who I’d have to keep you away from, and the guys’ asses I needed to kick if I found out they broke your heart.”

I smiled then, unable to hold it in. He always managed to make me feel happy and beautiful, even if it was just with a look or a few words strung together. It seemed impossible to me but he saw something in me worth having, worth fighting for.

“But I should have known Alice,” he smirked at me and caught my hand in his, still perched on his motorcycle “that you were the one breaking hearts.”

Our fingers entwined together and he swung them between us like we were little children. I rolled my eyes at him but felt the smile just grow even stronger. He was the first person I’d ever found who loved me fully and totally for who I was. He was the only one I trusted with everything and not Cassidy Blockwood or anyone was going to destroy that.

“I’m pretty impressed at your detective skills though, I mean even I had forgotten about Ben Hunt.”

He reeled me in closer and smirked “what can I say? I’m a pretty impressive guy.”

“Don’t get cocky now,” I said softly, my breath washing over his face as he closed his eyes “I don’t like cocky guys.”

He opened his eyes and met my playful gaze with a heated look of his own. When he leaned in to join our lips I teetered back on my heels, biting my lip to keep in a girlish giggle.

“Are you taking me somewhere or what Vaughn?”

“I will, but the toll is a kiss.”

I pretended to consider this for a second before shaking my head. “The bus is cheaper.”

When I made to walk away he grabbed me around my middle and pulled me right against him, making me laugh. He growled lowly in my ear before kissing my neck quickly.

“Vaughn!” I choked on the chortle “we’re still in public.”

I felt his shoulders shift in a shrug as if he couldn’t feel the eyes on us from all around. It was lunchtime for the whole high school and the grounds were teeming with students enthusiastically trying to enjoy the early summer weather. But Vaughn and I seemed to be more entertaining than the sunshine, their inquisitive eyes eager to devour any affection shared between the mismatched couple.

I felt one girl’s eyes burning into us the most, so hotly that I was surprised my skin didn’t blister with it. Cassidy crossed her arms over her chest, those high black heels poised just before the grass. She saw the way Vaughn held me and the laughter noiselessly printed all over my smile – she knew that she hadn’t broken us. But she’d try again. I could read the determination in between her glares.

“Come on, I really don’t want to stick around here anymore.”

“As soon as I get my kiss, we’ll be off.”

“Vaughn,” I moaned, struggling out of his grasp. Cassidy’s eyes were unnerving me, as if I could hear her picking me apart in her head. I didn’t want to hear her anymore, even if it was just my imaginings.

“Fine then, we’ll just sit here and I’ll kiss you.”

“Not in front of this crowd you won’t,” I frowned at him but found it dissolving quickly. Vaughn shot me his crooked smile, the one that could get me to forgive and forget anything. It was dangerous, that smile, so dangerous that I found myself leaning forward into him until my lips were hovering over his.

When I hesitated he closed the distance himself and kissed me fiercely. I smiled into the kiss, finding my toes curling in my shoes and my hands smoothing down his shoulders. When he pulled away the smile was still there only bigger, causing the butterflies in my stomach to flutter to their hearts content.

“I love you,” he said softly against my lips “Katerina meant nothing, nothing compared to you.”

“Who was she?” I dared to ask.

“She was my first girlfriend and the girl I thought I’d be with forever, as all fifteen year-old kids think.”

He paused for a long moment and I was about to talk when he continued, a light frown etched in his porcelain skin.

“We were happy for a long time and I told her I loved her, more than once, and she said it back to me. I thought we were made for each other and was crazy enough to tell her all about me and my illness.

“That’s when things began to change. She didn’t like me touching her anymore, she didn’t want me to call her and she certainly didn’t want to hear me tell her I loved her. She said that I’d broken her heart, that she didn’t want to be near someone who was just going to die. Next thing I know she’s halfway across the country and all I’m left with is a short sorry letter explaining why she had to go.”

I raised a hand to cup his cheek, wary of how his eyes had clouded over and his jaw was clenched.

“I’d never do that to you.”

“I know,” he covered my hand with his and turned his head to kiss my palm “I love you more than I thought it was possible to love someone.”

I smiled sadly at him, wishing with every part of me that I had the guts to say it back. But that was where I couldn’t quite overcome my old self. She was still there, telling me it didn’t exist. And all I had to do was close my eyes to remember the pain of my parents’ marriage, all of the lost weekends and stolen tears and broken hearts.

“I’m sorry I asked about her, it wasn’t right of me to pry. I trust you.”

“What do you say we hold these thoughts and head back to yours? I think the sentiments would be much more romantic said in your bedroom rather than in front of a crowd of our peers,” he smirked and tugged on my hand.

I laughed giddily and took the helmet sitting behind him. I didn’t care about Cassidy Blockwood or about those people with narrowed eyes or Katerina in some other state halfway across the country. She had chosen to run away from Vaughn because of his illness, because he was a sick fifteen year-old boy who was confused and naïve. She should have known that he was worth all of the pain, she should have anticipated that letting him go would be the worst mistake of her life.

But she hadn’t and I was glad because now he was all mine.

“Hold on tight Alice,” he laughed, revving the engine as the crowd of onlooker stared. “I feel like putting on a show for these vultures.”

I yelped, squeezing my thighs tightly around him as the bike sped off, half tilting back with the impact. I cursed him to high heaven but he couldn’t hear me. And even if he could he’d just throw me that crooked smile – my smile – and tell me to shut up and enjoy the ride.