The Town of Fracs

"What's this?" The drink that Mumble, not Mr. Whale, had given me was yellow. I took a drink of it. It was tart, nothing like the water I was used to. I swished it around in my mouth a bit.

"Melted yellow snow."

I spit it out and wiped my tongue. OMPG! I was drinking pee! What kind of a messed up penguin would drink pee? I remembered that I had just drank some. I was a messed up penguin!

"It was just lemonade. I was kidding."

I wanted to sigh in relief. I wasn't a messed up penguin after all! It ruffled my feathers though. "You kid too much! What if I had choked on that and died, huh? How would you feel then?"

"Sor-ree," he mumbled like a baby chick.

I missed the chiding tone because he had mumbled! I yipped loudly. "Did you just mumble?" I didn't wait for an answer. "Oh my Penguin God! Mumble mumbles! That's so cute!"

"Cute?" He looked mildly embarrassed.

"Yep! It's adorable!" I let the comment roll off of my feathered back. I was done with my egg, and I wanted to see the rest of Mumble's lair. "I'm going to explore this place, 'kay?"

I left the bewildered penguin and ran up the stairs. There were one, two, three, four... five! On the top floor, there was five doors.

"Wait up!" Mumble grumbled.

I spun around on the heels of my webbed feet. "What, yo? You keepin' me from crashin' yo crib."

"What the hell?" Mumble's brow furrowed.

I shrugged. "I picked up a few things from the Erect-crested penguins. Now, where can I sleep?"

Mumble raised an eyebrow. "And what makes you think you're staying the night here?"

The bottom of my beak trembled. "I-I thought that maybe I could."

His shoulders slumped. "Why don't you go back to your own igloo?"

I cocked my head to the side. Was he stupid? "I have no igloo. I'm a hobo pengiun."

"Say what?" His polar-ice eyes widened.

"Yes."

"Well..." he sighed, giving up. "All right, come into this room."

I waddled happily, but my cheery gait stopped abruptly. It was a storage room.

"Wait right here." Mumble scurried out of the room and returned a moment later with some old newspapers.

What was he doing?

He then grabbed an empy cardboard box, set it on the floor, and lined it with newspapers. "There! You can sleep here tonight."

My face fell. "You expect me to sleep in a box?"

"Yes."

"I sleep in boxes everyday!" I scoffed.

"Exactly. This won't feel alien."

"Well, I sure hope it doesn't feel like a green, slimy monster. Can I sleep on the couch downstairs?"

"You want to sleep... on my new couch?" He looked perturbed.

"Yes, I do," I answered slowly. I wondered if he was a slow penguin? Poor guy.

He crinkled his beak reluctantly. "Okay."

I waddled out of the room, feeling victorious. No cardboard box for me! I felt like singing. Then I spotted it.

"OMPG! What is that!?" I was looking at a smooth, glistening icy slope that dropped from where they were standing to the ground floor.

His crestfallen face looked up. "That's my ramp. I broke my foot a while back, and I couldn't get down the stairs. So I had it installed."

I wanted to ask how he got up the stairs, but I didn't really care. "I wanna use it!"

Mumble looked alarmed. "No! Don't-"

I belly-flopped on the ramp and kicked off, quickly picking up speed.

"Wheee!" I was going fast! This was awesome!

Too soon, I reached the end of the ramp, but inertia kept me going, and I slid even faster across the icy floor. I realized with a start that I was going to hit the wall! I tried to stop, but it was too late.

When I collided with the wall, I expected that to be the painful end of my joyride. I was mistaken. Instead of coming to a halt, I crashed through[ the wall and into the chilly outdoor air.

My head began to throb as I continued my course into Mumble's yard. The earlier rain just had to freeze and make everything so slick.

I was fortunate that when I painfully struck the hard, ice-slicked road, I barreled into something, keeping me from coasting all the way to Mexico.

I shook my throbbing head, scattering a few drops of blood on the white surface of the road. Blinking, I looked up...

... into the dark eyes of a male penguin, the obstruction that saved me from sliding through town. "Thank you for stopping me," I chirped to said obstruction.

He looked me over with sable eyes, making me feel a little uneasy. "No problem. Your eyes... they are beautiful."

I shuffled my feet, my feathers growing warm.

"Thank you, señorita," I answered, flaunting my knowledge of Spanish from the time I met some Galapagos penguins.

"You mean señor?"

"Huh?" I asked, befuddled.

"Never mind. It was a pleasure of mine to help you, Miss...?"

"Miss what?"

"Your name?"

"I don't miss my name! My name is always with me," I answered the crazy penguin.

He chuckled. "What is your name?"

"My name is Clementine. Why were you asking if I missed my-"

"Clementine! What the hell? I told you not to go down the ramp!" Mumbled yelled as he
waddled out onto the road.

"I have to go. See you around, Clementine," the penguin purred, grinning sadistically before he turned around and left.