The Professor's Daughter

The skies were darkening as Maria and Leighton approached the hospital, following the signs and eventually ending up in front of Anne Ludwig’s room. They peered in the window through the slits of the blind; she was alone.

“Mr Ludwig is often at home around this time,” A nurse said as she strolled by, answering Maria’s unspoken question. “I’m sure he’ll be back shortly.”

It had been the same nurse from when Maria had first visited and she sighed heavily at the way the nurse patted her hair and straightened her uniform when she saw whom Maria was with.

I don’t need to worry about you right now, Maria thought, glancing at Leighton who in turn, spun around to face her obliviously.

“Would you like me to come in with you?” He asked, taking hold of both of Maria’s hands.

Maria shook her head, “It’s ok, with Papa gone, I can at least talk to her without him overhearing. The doctor said it’s good to talk to her.”

“I’m sure she’ll be pleased to hear your voice.”

He pulled her closer and pressed his lips to her forehead. Maria closed her eyes and breathed in Leighton’s soapy smell, the muted aroma of his aftershave, the fresh fragrance of detergent.

She felt so safe there, with his hands on her shoulders protecting her from anyone else wanting to intrude and cause trouble. He was so heartfelt and strong that she greedily wished some of his strength would flow through to her, like a drug to keep her going.

“I’ll be right out here.” He murmured near her ear, causing a shiver to rattle down her spine.

Maria nodded and reluctantly stepped away, opening the door to her mother’s room and taking a seat. She gently took Anne’s hand, stroking down the little hairs like a child with a doll. Her eyes moved to the window where Leighton stood watching her. She smiled and Leighton knew it to be one of the saddest smiles he’d ever witnessed.

With a deep sigh, Leighton ran his hands through his hair and sat down on the chairs across the corridor. He knew that she needed him and he didn’t mind that, after all he needed her too because if Maria hadn’t come into his life he’d still be that hostile man back in his classroom, too focused on his career to realize that there were other things more important in life. Unknowingly she’d taught him to feel again, as cliché as it sounds, she’d brought the warmth back to his cold heart.

Leighton peeked up from his hands as someone cleared their throat nearby.

There stood Professor Ludwig, his beady eyes searching for something in the distance, his bushy eyebrows furrowed together.

“I think you and I need to have a little talk. Don’t you?”

“Hello Mum, it’s Maria.”

Maria tucked a wisp of hazel hair behind her mother’s ear.

”I’m sorry I haven’t visited in a while, life’s been a little hectic recently. I started back at the University again today, I know you wouldn’t want my studies to suffer and they haven’t, I promise. Professor Leighton brought me back some work so that kept me up-to-date.

“I’m still staying at his apartment; it’s beautiful, all traditional but modern as well, I think you’d like it. I think you’d like him as well. Maybe when you wake up I can introduce you both. He’s so very different from the teenager that visited us back home.

“Do you remember what he was like? All gangly and curly-haired? And those woolen shirts you used to berate him for, what was it you would say? You’ll melt as fast as Maria’s ice cream, something like that anyway. I always remembered because he’d fidget and mumble about how easily he felt the cold.

“And you mustn’t take into account what happened between him and father, it is too far in the past to still bring it up and it’s not fair on him. He has been nothing but nice to me since Rostock, letting me stay with him and bringing me here to visit you.”

Maria sighed and leant on the mattress.

“I hope you don’t think me a wuss for not staying back at the flat with Papa, you know I would do anything for him but right now there’s so much going on, Susie won’t talk to me still and staying with Leighton has just made things so much easier. We went back to the flat the other day and it’s such a mess without you hoovering under our feet and whatnot. Maybe now’s the time to go back, maybe now I can finally help Papa, maybe I’ve abandoned him for too long.

“Oh Mama, why is life so difficult? Why can’t it just be straightforward and less problematic? You’d know what to do for sure, you always know. Perhaps you could just whisper it in my ear, eh? No? Not even just a little sign?”

Anne Ludwig stayed perfectly still in her hospital bed, unbeknown to Maria, her sign was already in action.

Leighton followed Professor Ludwig until they were out of sight from the window. The Professor turned back to Leighton as he towered over the little man but height did not daunt Ludwig who caused his partners hands to clam up just that little bit.

“It has come to my attention that you appear close to my daughter.” The professor began.

“Professor Ludwig, I –“

Ludwig raised an unimpressed brow. “So you do know who I am, then?”

“Yes, Sir.” Leighton spoke slowly, did he not know who Leighton was?

“That’s marvelous, now I would try and find out who you were but right now it is of little importance to me.” Ludwig’s voice was low and thick with a German accent, causing Leighton to lean forwards as he strained to hear the professor’s controlled words. “What is of importance is my daughter. She is very young and naïve, she knows little of the real world, always was a dreamer. My wife and I have always been aware of this and so we do what we consider best for her.”

“Of course, but Maria is-“

“You are not to say her name.” Ludwig spat, his chest heaved as he took short breaths and tried to calm himself. “As I… As I said, what we consider best. Now as I’m sure you know, Mrs Ludwig is in a coma and so I have taken the responsibility to tell you to stay away from my daughter.”

Leighton stared at the man incredulously, “Stay away?”

“Yes, stay away. She does not need you right now, she needs her family and that is me.”

The Professor’s voice stayed calm but Leighton could not keep up such a persona at the thought of Maria leaving his life.

“You are wrong, she does need me, more then you would ever want her to. Who do you think has helped her get through this past week? Certainly not you, you have done nothing for her and now…” Leighton was all a fluster as he raised his voice. Anyone passing would believe Leighton was abusing this poor man but he knew better. Professor Ludwig was far stronger and more cunning then he’d have people believe. “Now you are taking away what she really needs.”

“I am protecting her.” Ludwig fumed.

“You are protecting yourself.” Leighton argued. “Whether it is from your wife when she wakes up and realizes that you have left your daughter to cope alone, or from the guilty conscience you have gained over this past week. Either way it makes no difference to me, Maria is my priority and I am not going anywhere.”

Ludwig stood stunned at the man before him, his nose hair quivering as rage surged through him. Rarely had he been spoken to in such a way, did this man have no manners? He was an elderly man, once a University professor, trying to protect his daughter. Who was he to act in such a fashion?

“Are you saying Maria must either choose me, her father, or you? Some nobody, she has known for a few measly weeks.”

“I am saying that you are talking of taking away what Maria cares about and who cares about her.”

“You think Maria cares about you?”

“Yes, I believe so.”

Ludwig eyed Leighton up and down. “We’ll see about that.”

Leighton watched as Ludwig staggered towards his wife’s hospital room and disappeared inside. He slammed his fist against the corridor wall causing a couple of uncomfortable onlookers to jump.

What had he done? These past days he’d had Maria to himself, sure, she’d visit her mother but she was still in his life and now? Well, now he’d angered Professor Ludwig and he knew that her father would make her choose. That wasn’t what he wanted; he didn’t want to separate her from her family. Family was so important, he’d learnt that lesson a long time ago.

Why did you have to ruin it? He screamed in his head just as a door clicked shut not too far away.

“Thomas?” Came a little voice that tugged on his heartstrings.

“Maria.” He rushed over to her, his hands brushing up and down as he bent to look her in the eye. “What’s happened?”

Maria shook her head and eyed Leighton quizzically, “Is everything alright? You seem agitated.”

Leighton smiled as he pulled Maria closer and wrapped his arms around her back. “Everything’s fine.” He lied as she buried her head into his shoulder. Maybe Ludwig had more compassion then he let on, maybe he’d changed his mind and realized how determined Leighton was to stay by Maria.

The pair stood there in the corridor, wound around each other in silence. A patient’s relative nearby turned away from the simple but intimate moment with pink cheeks and others did not allow themselves to take the couple in fully in fear.

Meanwhile, Leighton couldn’t put it into words how grateful he was to still be able to hold Maria, to still show her how much he cared about her, perhaps he hadn’t realized to the whole extent what losing her would mean to him.

“Thomas?” Muffled Maria.

“Yes?”

“Thank you.”

Leighton pulled back a little.

“For what?”

“For taking care of me when I couldn’t.”

“You know I’d do it again.”

“I know, but I think I’m ready now.”

“Ready?”

The first rock fell.

“To take care of myself.” And then another as Maria continued. “And to go back home.”

“But you don’t need to.”

“No, but I have to. I have left Papa for too long to cope on his own.”

More stones crumbled beneath him. Maria looked up at him but Leighton couldn’t describe what she looked like, he couldn’t see anything, he could only feel her moving away even if she hadn’t moved an inch in reality.

“Staying with you has been amazing but it was never supposed to be long term. It is the best timing to leave now and go and take care of my father.”

“But we are just beginning ourselves.” Leighton argued, stepping back.

“Exactly, if I leave now then there is no chance of becoming too attached. Please, just accept this.”

“Accept what part? Fine, you have to go home and even though I will miss having you around, I know we could make this work. But you are sounding like you are leaving me forever, not just in the evenings and at the breakfast table. This is just your father talking, tomorrow, stay after class and we can sort this out. Please.”

Maria bit her lip and shook her head, wishing Leighton didn’t see the lie. “I am not saying it is forever, I’m saying I need time. Time to sort out my family life and time to think about us. It is such a big risk, being together, I worked that out on Sunday.”

“And have I not shown you that I’m willing to take that risk?” Leighton tried.

Maria smiled. “You have and I am so very grateful. Just please grant me the space to put things in order.”

Leighton could not bring his eyes to look at Maria, he had vowed long ago to keep his emotions from people, even when a person like Maria had come into his life and brought him to open up even more, it had only caused further sadness.

He nodded unwillingly. If he cared about her, then he knew he had to let her go, at least for a little while.

“Thank you.” Maria whispered, she turned to go back in to see her mother but stopped when she heard him call after her.

“Are you sure this is what you want?” Leighton asked, his eyes so full of hope that it pained Maria to reply.

“Sometimes, Thomas, it is not about what you want, it is about what is best for everyone else.”

And with that Maria went back into her mother’s room. She would not cry. Not yet. She’d wait until she was back in her camp bed with the scratchy sheets and broken springs.

Professor Ludwig glanced up, he had wiped away the tears that had run so quickly and well-practiced down his cheeks earlier when he’d asked his daughter to simply ‘take care of her old Papa’. That was all that had been required, there was no need to bring up the argument he’d had with the young man in the corridor.

“And?” He asked with a fake pained expression.

Maria nodded. “I’m coming home, Papa.”

Ludwig gave a watery-eyed smile as he clasped his daughter’s hand whilst she let her head rest on his shoulder and her eyes slip shut.

Only then did he turn to the frozen man in the window and smile a smug smile.

He’d managed to get rid of him without even learning his name.