Killing Me Softly
Chapter Two.
Sara's house was like mine. A terrace house, connected in a long line to others.
Just like almost every other home in Iceland, Germany, Switzerland... And just Europe in general.
It was snowing lightly again, covering the roads with small sugar coloured mounds all over.
Snowflakes romantically danced around me, the occasional ones landing on my shoulders.
Oh, how I loved Iceland. I didn't want to go.
Saderah, Sara's younger sister, answered the door.
"Hey, Sare." I said softly. "Is you sister home?"
"Ja..." Saderah answered. "She's upstairs with Isabelle and Charlotte, in her bedroom. Oh, and Claire is coming downstairs now."
"Thanks... Hey, Claire!" I yelled to one of my best friends walking down the steps. She was dressed in a lacy, black, silky dress, almost like a nightgown. Over it was a stylish black jacket.
"Aww. Darling." Claire said when she saw me, kissing me on both cheeks, then hugging me desperately. "How are you? And Jonas?"
"Um... Jonas's okay I guess. I haven't seen him since you last did. And myself well, I have to tell you..."
"That's great, honey. Look I have to get going, Jacques wants to get me before tomorrow... You know what he's like. Argh... boyfriends. I'd rather fun rides, don't you?"
"Um... No I love steady relationships... Like Jonas and I."
She gave me a withering look.
"Hmm... Yes, like you and... Jonas... I must go, toodaloo!"
"Wait! Claire!''
She ran off into the snow.
I knocked lightly on Sara's bedroom door.
"Come in!" She sang, accompanied by my friends' giggles.
"Hey guys!" I said, walking in and sitting next to them on Sara's bed. "Where was Claire going? She looked pretty dolled up... And in a hurry!"
"Umm... I think she was seeing Jacques." Isabelle said.
"Yeah... Jacques." The others agreed.
"Okay... So I have some news. Bad news..."
I told them about Mum's decision, about Dad. They started crying.
''No!" They howled. "You can't go!"
"I know. I will miss you all so much. And Jonas."
When I mentioned my boyfriend they went into a deep silence.
"What's wrong with Jonas?" I asked. "What's happened?"
"What? Nothing."
"Are you sure?" I asked, not feeling convinced.
"Yeah, yeah, positive."
"Okay... Well speaking of Jonas, I'm going to say good bye to him now."
"Uh... Sadie, why don't you wait until the morning? Say an emotional good bye in the airport? Don't wake him now."
"It's 6.00pm in the evening..."
"Yes, but it gets really really dark very quickly. You, of all people know his parents. They won't be very happy."
"I come to his house at 10.00pm almost every second night... They don't mind."
I grabbed my black coat and stood up, pulling the waist band of my blue skinny jeans up as I did so.
I swung my leather bag around my shoulder. I opened the bedroom door.
Jonas's house, again, was like everyone elses.
I knew which one was his immediately, even in the dark of night.
The stars had already begun to shine.
That was when I finally checked my watch and noticed it was already past 7.30pm.
I was supposed to be home ages ago.
"Sadie, are you sure? It's pretty cold out."
"Yeah... I love him. Why wouldn't I want to see him any chance I get? I'm leaving tomorrow, remember."
"Um. Yeah. Let's just go."
"There's something you want to tell me. Just tell me."
"There's nothing to tell you."
We walked the rest of the way in silence.
Eventually we made it to his house.
"Before I go in, what..." I started to say, mesmerised by the silohettes in Jonas's window.
Him. Claire.
My boyfriend. One of my best ever friends.
"Is that what you were going to tell me?" I asked, pointing to his window, my voice stuck angrily in my throat.
"I'm so sorry, Sadie."
I knew immediately my heart had just broken.
I loved Jonas.
I had to go inside.
I walked up to his front door, the snow covering my boot.
"What are you doing?'' Sara asked.
"I have to see for myself." I replied, opening the door.
It wasn't locked.
I made my way softly up the stairs and into his room.
His parents were not home.
Suddenly, as I stood outside his room, I wondered to myself how everything had gone so wrong.
Why had Jonas wanted to cheat on me?
Why is Mum making us leave?
Why is all this just suddenly happening?
Why couldn't it happen once I had left home or something?
I opened the door. Claire looked up. Her face was frozen in posisition.
I could feel Isabelle, Charlotte and Sara breathing behind me.
I could feel them giving Claire, and Jonas, horrible looks.
Claire was wrapped in his sheets. In him. That should have been me.
She whispered something in Jonas's ear, but he couldn't hear what she was saying over his pleasurable grunting.
"Jonas! Stop." Claire said louder. He stopped, looking up to the doorway.
My face was coated in tears. He could see me turn away.
"Sadie!'' He screeched, stopping what he was doing.
He wrapped himself in his sheets, exposing Claire.
She screamed and tried to hide her body.
We turned away, facing the stairs. When the three of us turned again, they were both dressed, sitting on the bed.
''I better go...'' Claire mumbled, walking out the door, trying to push past us.
Sara pushed her back inside.
"You're not going anywhere."
Claire understood. She stopped trying to get away.
"What are you... Doing here?" Jonas asked, afriad I might crack and scream at him.
"I tried to tell Claire at Sara's house but she was running out the door to fuck you.'' I replied,feeling so upset and angry. Betrayed.
I couldn't let my emotions bubble over the top. I had to wait for that.
"What are you doing here?" He asked again. I wanted to slap him.
"I was coming to tell you, Jonas. Mum has left Dad. They're getting a divorce. Mum is taking me to California in a few hours. Tomorrow morning. I wanted to say good bye. But I guess you have Claire for that, now."
I turned on my heels to walk out. With one last dirty look, Sara, Charlotte and Isabelle followed me out to the grassy, icey land.
"Wait, Sadie, please." Jonas called. I wanted to listen to his story.
"What?"
"Can we make this work out? Please? I love you."
"Well you were screwing one of my best friends so you couldn't 'love' me, could you?"
"Could you drop that, please?" He pleaded.
''Fuck you, Jonas.'' I replied. ''I'm leaving tomorrow, so as of then you can fuck Claire as much as you please.''
For one last time, I turned to look at Jonas's house.
Claire was casually leaning against the door frame, a short silky lace night gown hung loosely on her small figure.
"Good bye, Jonas." I said, walking off into the snow completely by myself.
This is going to be a long few months...
Just like almost every other home in Iceland, Germany, Switzerland... And just Europe in general.
It was snowing lightly again, covering the roads with small sugar coloured mounds all over.
Snowflakes romantically danced around me, the occasional ones landing on my shoulders.
Oh, how I loved Iceland. I didn't want to go.
Saderah, Sara's younger sister, answered the door.
"Hey, Sare." I said softly. "Is you sister home?"
"Ja..." Saderah answered. "She's upstairs with Isabelle and Charlotte, in her bedroom. Oh, and Claire is coming downstairs now."
"Thanks... Hey, Claire!" I yelled to one of my best friends walking down the steps. She was dressed in a lacy, black, silky dress, almost like a nightgown. Over it was a stylish black jacket.
"Aww. Darling." Claire said when she saw me, kissing me on both cheeks, then hugging me desperately. "How are you? And Jonas?"
"Um... Jonas's okay I guess. I haven't seen him since you last did. And myself well, I have to tell you..."
"That's great, honey. Look I have to get going, Jacques wants to get me before tomorrow... You know what he's like. Argh... boyfriends. I'd rather fun rides, don't you?"
"Um... No I love steady relationships... Like Jonas and I."
She gave me a withering look.
"Hmm... Yes, like you and... Jonas... I must go, toodaloo!"
"Wait! Claire!''
She ran off into the snow.
I knocked lightly on Sara's bedroom door.
"Come in!" She sang, accompanied by my friends' giggles.
"Hey guys!" I said, walking in and sitting next to them on Sara's bed. "Where was Claire going? She looked pretty dolled up... And in a hurry!"
"Umm... I think she was seeing Jacques." Isabelle said.
"Yeah... Jacques." The others agreed.
"Okay... So I have some news. Bad news..."
I told them about Mum's decision, about Dad. They started crying.
''No!" They howled. "You can't go!"
"I know. I will miss you all so much. And Jonas."
When I mentioned my boyfriend they went into a deep silence.
"What's wrong with Jonas?" I asked. "What's happened?"
"What? Nothing."
"Are you sure?" I asked, not feeling convinced.
"Yeah, yeah, positive."
"Okay... Well speaking of Jonas, I'm going to say good bye to him now."
"Uh... Sadie, why don't you wait until the morning? Say an emotional good bye in the airport? Don't wake him now."
"It's 6.00pm in the evening..."
"Yes, but it gets really really dark very quickly. You, of all people know his parents. They won't be very happy."
"I come to his house at 10.00pm almost every second night... They don't mind."
I grabbed my black coat and stood up, pulling the waist band of my blue skinny jeans up as I did so.
I swung my leather bag around my shoulder. I opened the bedroom door.
Jonas's house, again, was like everyone elses.
I knew which one was his immediately, even in the dark of night.
The stars had already begun to shine.
That was when I finally checked my watch and noticed it was already past 7.30pm.
I was supposed to be home ages ago.
"Sadie, are you sure? It's pretty cold out."
"Yeah... I love him. Why wouldn't I want to see him any chance I get? I'm leaving tomorrow, remember."
"Um. Yeah. Let's just go."
"There's something you want to tell me. Just tell me."
"There's nothing to tell you."
We walked the rest of the way in silence.
Eventually we made it to his house.
"Before I go in, what..." I started to say, mesmerised by the silohettes in Jonas's window.
Him. Claire.
My boyfriend. One of my best ever friends.
"Is that what you were going to tell me?" I asked, pointing to his window, my voice stuck angrily in my throat.
"I'm so sorry, Sadie."
I knew immediately my heart had just broken.
I loved Jonas.
I had to go inside.
I walked up to his front door, the snow covering my boot.
"What are you doing?'' Sara asked.
"I have to see for myself." I replied, opening the door.
It wasn't locked.
I made my way softly up the stairs and into his room.
His parents were not home.
Suddenly, as I stood outside his room, I wondered to myself how everything had gone so wrong.
Why had Jonas wanted to cheat on me?
Why is Mum making us leave?
Why is all this just suddenly happening?
Why couldn't it happen once I had left home or something?
I opened the door. Claire looked up. Her face was frozen in posisition.
I could feel Isabelle, Charlotte and Sara breathing behind me.
I could feel them giving Claire, and Jonas, horrible looks.
Claire was wrapped in his sheets. In him. That should have been me.
She whispered something in Jonas's ear, but he couldn't hear what she was saying over his pleasurable grunting.
"Jonas! Stop." Claire said louder. He stopped, looking up to the doorway.
My face was coated in tears. He could see me turn away.
"Sadie!'' He screeched, stopping what he was doing.
He wrapped himself in his sheets, exposing Claire.
She screamed and tried to hide her body.
We turned away, facing the stairs. When the three of us turned again, they were both dressed, sitting on the bed.
''I better go...'' Claire mumbled, walking out the door, trying to push past us.
Sara pushed her back inside.
"You're not going anywhere."
Claire understood. She stopped trying to get away.
"What are you... Doing here?" Jonas asked, afriad I might crack and scream at him.
"I tried to tell Claire at Sara's house but she was running out the door to fuck you.'' I replied,feeling so upset and angry. Betrayed.
I couldn't let my emotions bubble over the top. I had to wait for that.
"What are you doing here?" He asked again. I wanted to slap him.
"I was coming to tell you, Jonas. Mum has left Dad. They're getting a divorce. Mum is taking me to California in a few hours. Tomorrow morning. I wanted to say good bye. But I guess you have Claire for that, now."
I turned on my heels to walk out. With one last dirty look, Sara, Charlotte and Isabelle followed me out to the grassy, icey land.
"Wait, Sadie, please." Jonas called. I wanted to listen to his story.
"What?"
"Can we make this work out? Please? I love you."
"Well you were screwing one of my best friends so you couldn't 'love' me, could you?"
"Could you drop that, please?" He pleaded.
''Fuck you, Jonas.'' I replied. ''I'm leaving tomorrow, so as of then you can fuck Claire as much as you please.''
For one last time, I turned to look at Jonas's house.
Claire was casually leaning against the door frame, a short silky lace night gown hung loosely on her small figure.
"Good bye, Jonas." I said, walking off into the snow completely by myself.
This is going to be a long few months...