Protect Me From What I Want

“Come on, motherfucker!” I screamed as I honked the van horn once The Joker appeared around the corner. It was hard to see him considering that the snow had began to play up again and was now attacking everything that it lay upon in hard, powerful clumps. He shuffled his feet towards the van taking his goddamn time as well and I had already lost my last nerve. My irritableness had reached a whole new level. Once The Joker was in the driver’s seat he started up the van and as if on cue we both heard the sound of cop car sirens wailing along the roads. “Where the hell were you?!”

“Hush!” He yelled as he pushed my face away from him. The van swerved and skidded along the snow to escape the beeline of the cop cars. There were at least three of them already after us and I couldn’t see how The Joker planned on escaping them especially with this icy snow. I punched him in the arm as hard as I could and crossed my arms over my chest afterwards. It was a childish thing to do, but I was only acting that way because it was how he treated me. He patronised me, sounding as if I was a little kid. He also seemed nonchalant on the fact that he just threw me off the roof of a six story building.

“How could you do that to me, J!? I could have died,” I whined, tears now blatantly rolling down my cheeks. They were inescapable too, so no matter how hard I tried to stop they were simply relentless. Whenever I did attempt to stop crying, the lump that had formed in the back of my throat would make me choke. “Are you even listening to me?”

“Yes, Harley! I’m listening. Yeesh...Rachel didn’t complain this much when I threw her out of the window! And that building was higher up!”

“That’s because you blew her up!”

“Ha...yeah.” He began laughing to himself as he reminisced about his own sick little memories that brought enjoyment to him.

“This isn’t funny! That’s a real bad joke,” I snivelled; my voice cracking as I wiped away tears with my sleeve. “How can you not show any remorse even now? You’re just laughing like you don’t even care. You’re sick. Sick, sick, sick.”

“So glad you noticed.”

“You-”

“Oh, shut up Harley! You little naive...brat! Do you really think I would have dropped you off that roof if I didn’t know for certain that Batman would save you?! You really underestimate me sometimes...just...shut up and be a good girl for your Mr J.”

“What a lie! How could you know for certain that Batman would save me? He could have just let me die considering that I am a wanted criminal now.” I let out a high-pitched whimper when The Joker’s leather clad had grabbed a fist full of my hair. He wrenched my head closer to him, his eyes still on the road as he dodged oncoming cars.

“Listen, I told you to shut up. And right now you’re getting on my last nerve, so I’m really starting to lose my patience, little girl. So do as I say and be quiet,” he warned me through clenched teeth. He let go of my hair and shoved my head away again. Hot tears of anger were now rolling down my face as I mentally argued with him inside my head. If he couldn’t hear me then I wouldn’t get hurt for answering back to him.

Eventually The Joker took a quick swerve to the left and managed to lose the cops, but god knows for how long. The car ride was relevantly quiet with me and The Joker sitting in our angry silence and the goons sitting in the back indifferently. The Joker quickly pulled in between two dilapidated buildings along a deserted street. I didn’t have a clue where we were, but I thought that The Joker was going to start the engine up again any second now so we could head back home. I was wrong. He pulled on the handbrake and took the keys out of the ignition.

“Where the hell are we?” I asked still irritated. The Joker ignored me and proceeded to exiting the van. Not knowing what else to do, I followed. “Hey! Where are we?!” I repeated, louder this time.

“Come on,” The Joker ordered as he opened a battered wooden door that had paint chips beginning to peel off it. With an angry frown I entered the building close behind him and into a room that was colder than being outside. It was dark with only minimal light shining through the boarded up windows, however I could still see weapons and bombs scattered around the room. Some in boxes and some just as an array on the floor. “Harley, this is my weaponry hideout. We’ll be staying here until the cops have gone and the snow has died down. Even if that means we have to stay the night.”

“Oh no. No, no, no, no, no. I’m not staying in here,” I argued. I knew I was beginning to sound just like a nag but this place was almost unbearable. It was cold, dark, damp, cramped, and unhygienic and there was no place for us to sleep anyway. What was he planning? Sleeping on a pile of bombs? That sounds comfy; note the sarcasm.

The Joker rolled his eyes at my nagging and turned towards his men. “Men, unfortunately there isn’t enough space for you, so you’re going to have to walk back to the manor.”

“But boss-” Ah! One of them was brave enough to protest. Now I knew I wasn’t the only one having just about enough of The Joker.

“Ah tah tah tah! Just go. I don’t care about the snow; you’re all menly men so it shouldn’t be a problem for you.”

Without anyone else protesting, they all trudged back out of the building and into the intense snow. They all had faces of displeasure and annoyance. The door closed leaving just me and The Joker behind. “Well why can’t we just walk back to the manor?”

He turned around and face me, looking at me as if I was stupid. “Look at me, Harley! Do you really think that the cops aren’t going to recognise me?! And if you want to walk into that raging blizzard, then be my guest.”

“Stop talking to me as if I’m stupid! I only asked a question; you don’t need to shout at me and be all patronising. I really hate you sometimes,” I hissed admittedly.

“Whatever,” The Joker grumbled as he stepped over weapons to reach the boarded up window. He began peering through one of the cracks, but I doubted he could see anything through all the thick snow. I glared at him through squinted eyes wishing for anything to spontaneously cause pain to him. My vicious streak inside of me was flaring up and I wanted to do something to him...anything that would hurt him. Kick him, nip him, punch him, slap him and bite him. Anything just to free myself from this violent anger inside of me. But I refrained from doing so because I didn’t want to sink to his level and resort to violence to relieve myself of stress. “You know what, Harley?”

“What?” I spat.

“You know what I noticed?”

“What?!”

“I noticed something between you and Batman. I noticed that you were clinging onto him and wrapping around him pretty tightly back there. Is there something you want to tell me?”

I scoffed loudly. Jealous bastard. I’d had enough of him and I couldn’t take the built up rage anymore. I grabbed a small hand gun from of the floor and launched the weapon directly at his head. When it collided with the back of his skull, he didn’t even groan in pain which surprised me. He wobbled slightly and then froze on the spot. Maybe I underestimated the weight of the gun because the next thing I knew, The Joker was collapsing to the ground completely knocked out by the supposedly minor attack.

I gasped and clasped my mouth in shock. I didn’t exactly know what I was expecting, but I certainly wasn’t expecting to knock him out. Hurriedly I rushed over to his side so I could examine him more closely. At first, I thought maybe he was just playing a trick on me and he was going to scream and scare the hell out of me any second now. But he didn’t. Oh my god, I killed the bloke. No, no. He was still breathing he had to be alive. I shook his face in an attempt to wake up but he didn’t stir.

“J?” I called out, tapping the side of his face gently. Nothing still. “Joker? Come on, wake up.” Wait. What am I doing? When he wakes up and finds that I just threw a gun at his head there’s going to be hell to pay. The Joker in a room full of explosives and guns is not a good mix especially when he’s angry. The door was just a few metres away and right now it was extremely tempting. I debated what to do for literally a second before standing up from off the floor and darting out of the building, leaving The Joker lying on the floor.