Come On, Sweet Catastrophe

Ruth could hear her heart beat in her ears. It was a slow, but forceful pumping that she could feel against her ribcage. She felt light-headed, as if she was going to faint, but she pushed through it and stumbled her way into the room. She stared down at his limp form, relieved to see the gentle movement of his chest expanding and deflating as he breathed.

She felt to her knees beside him, touching his face with the back of her hand. She pulled away quickly, shocked by the intense heat radiating from his cheeks. On one side, she was relieved. He wasn't dead, like she had assumed when she noticed him on the floor, but he wasn't well. She could see that in the pale, greenish colour of his skin. Ruth hated it when Derek was sick. Aside from the fact that it also meant that she would eventually be sick, as a result of taking care of him, she didn't feel like he deserved it. He already felt so terrible every day of his life, she didn't think it was fair that he could feel worse. It made her feel so useless, watching him sulk around, because there was nothing she could do to help it. To help him. It broke her heart.

She shook him gently, rousing him from his sleep. His eyes fluttered open, blinking a few times to adjust to the light. They were slightly bloodshot, and the reddened colour somehow made his already brilliant, blue eyes even more vibrant. Ruth didn't think that was even possible. Derek had eyes so blue that you could see it in the dark. Even when he was far enough away from you that you can't clearly see any of his facial features, you could see that blue. He could make Ruth do anything he wanted her to, just from looking at her with those eyes the way he was right now. He stared up at her from beneath her lashes and Ruth moved his hair across his forehead with her fingers.

"Why am I on the floor?" he asked curiously, and Ruth chuckled, shaking her head.

"I was wondering the exact same thing." She raised her brows expectantly.

"Another one of life's great mysteries, I guess." He sat up, stretching his arms out in front of him. He turned to her with pouted lips, his shoulders slumping at his sides. "I don't feel well."

She found herself smiling back at him, for a bunch of different reasons. When he looked at her with his big, blue eyes, her heart always swelled. As much as she didn't want to admit it, she would never not be in love with Derek. Even when he was sat here, pouting and whining like a child, she still loved him. Even after having just gone out with Ryan, a ridiculously intelligent, incredibly kind and insanely handsome boy her own age, she still loved him. Even after realizing she could never have him, she still loved him and that was never going to change.

"Let's get you to bed." she smiled, helping him onto his feet. She let him lean his weight onto her as they slowly climbed the stairs. Once they were in his room, she turned away from him, looking through the various yellow pill bottles arranged in a line on his dresser as he stripped down and climbed into his bed.

"Sleeping pill tonight?" She asked, grabbing the bottle before he even answered. Lately, he's been denying the pills, insisting that he'd be fine without them, but Ruth knew that he would never get to sleep. She pushed the pill through his lips, despite his protests, and watched him swallow it dry. She still couldn't hold in the grimace when he did that.

"How was your date?" Derek asked, pulling her to sit down on the edge of the bed.

Ruth smiled softly, looking down at her lap. Her hands were clasped together and resting on her thighs. "It was really, really great."

Derek nodded. He didn't smile, nor frown or scowl. Ruth wished she could know exactly what he was thinking, but Derek rarely spoke his mind. "Did he treat you right?"

"He did." She smiled, giving him a gentle nod.

"Did he open doors for you?" She nodded. "And pull out your chair for you? And pay for the meal? And tell you that you look nice?" she chuckled, nodding again, watching the way his blue eyes were becoming progressively harder for him to keep open.

"Good, Ruth. You deserve to have that." He said softly, letting his eyes fall shut. Ruth assumed he was asleep, ready to get up and go to bed herself. However, his soft voice stopped her before she could move. "Did he kiss you?"

Ruth was quiet for a moment, trying to figure out the emotion behind his tone. "Yes, he did." she said softly, maybe even softer than he did.

Derek nodded his head and turned onto his side. "Goodnight, Ruth. Sweet dreams."

"You too." She whispered, standing up and turning the light off on the way out. She would replay this conversation over and over again in her mind all night.