Come On, Sweet Catastrophe

I hadn't even noticed that it was getting progressively darker outside while we sat in that diner booth. I was far too focused on the conversation and the greasy food and Ryan to notice that the sun went down long ago. 

He was wearing a knitted, charcoal grey sweater, with the collar of the blue button-up he wore underneath peaking up through the v-neckline. His curly hair had grown out a fair bit and hung down over his dark blue eyes. He looked insanely handsome, sitting across from me in his usual business casual attire, with this cute little smirk and a playful glint in his eyes. He was teasing me. He did that a lot, but I didn't mind. Not at all. Perhaps if I took myself more seriously, it would annoy me, but I didn't. I kind of liked it when he teased me, to be honest. You earn the right to tease someone once you've reached a certain level of comfortability with them and I guess I was just happy that a guy like Ryan had reached that level with me. 

"Ruth, have I ever told you how pretty I think you are?" Ryan asked me, his voice noticeably softer than it had been before. 

I grinned, looking down at the checkered table cloth shyly. "Once or twice, but you can tell me again." 

He laughed, a deep and throaty sound. I watched the way his skin crinkled by his eyes when he smiled. Ryan was beautiful. So painfully beautiful. I almost hated looking at him because I always lost my train of thought. 

"I think you're... Well, it's ridiculous, how pretty you are." He grinned, showing off every one of his straight, white teeth. "It's not really fair, to be honest. I'd even say it's offensive. How can anyone compete with that?" 

"You're delusional." I scoffed, rolling my eyes. "Or in desperate need of glasses." 

He reached across the table, taking both my hands in his. My heart was beating hard against my rib cage and I felt a fluttering in my stomach. He leaned close to me--Well, as close as he can with a table between us. He was looking at me from beneath his dark lashes, giving me a soft smile. "But you are, Ruth. You really are. When I look at you, all I want to do is kiss you. Seriously." 

I grinned, resting my chin in the palm of my hand. "Then why don't you?" 

He looked up from our connected hands, staring very deeply at me. His expression had changed drastically. He wasn't smiling anymore, but he wasn't frowning or scowling either. He looked serious, but by the way he was chewing on his bottom lip and the way his eyes were almost... Blazing, I knew that he wasn't angry or annoyed or upset. 

"I want you, Ruth." he said simply, licking his lips. 

"Y-you do?" I raised my brows and I could feel my cheeks turning red. Three words have never had such an effect on me as these ones day. My skin was buzzing and my ears felt hot. I could feel my heart beat in my temples. 

He laughed under his breath, his mouth curving into a sexy smile. I can't deny the way my skin burned when he looked at me like that, or the feelings that were stirring in the pit of my stomach. He can have me. Good lord, he could have me any time he wanted. I'm usually not this kind of girl, I'll have you know. I don't just sleep with boys after going on a couple dates. That wasn't me. I wait until well after they've asked me to be their girlfriend, you know, to maintain a certain amount of class. With Ryan, though, I just didn't want to think about it so much. That's why so many of my relationships never worked out. I always think too much. It shouldn't matter whether I've decided something is wrong after hours, even days of deliberation. What feels right should be what matters most and anything involving Ryan just felt right. 

So, if Ryan wanted to bring our relationship to that level, I was willing. I've read books and watched movies about people in these passionate relationships. Something I've never ever experienced in my life with any of my past boyfriends. Maybe it was time for that. I need to get over Derek. It's never going to happen for me, I know. What could be more perfect right now than Ryan? 

The answer is obviously 'nothing' because Ryan is friggen perfect in almost every way possible and I'm still completely taken aback by the fact that people like him even exist in the real world, let alone that he's interested in me. 

"Ruthie, I don't mean that sexually." He said softly, pulling me out of my thoughts. "I mean, I don't mean that non-sexually either because, god, Ruth, you have no idea what I want to do to, uhh..." He trailed off, grinning and shaking his head. I giggled, and he squeezed my hands a little tighter. "Pardon me. Anyways. I just want you. I want you around me, like, all the time-"

"Spoken like a true English major." I laughed.

"Shhh, you're ruining the moment." He laughed with me, shifting in his seat. "Ruth, I just want you to know that I'm serious about you. I mean, like, if you ever thought I wasn't or that I was dating other girls on the side-" That thought crossed my mind once or twice. "-I don't know. Whatever would make you think that I'm not serious about you, I just want you to know that I am, if you ever doubted it. I just need to know, though, are you serious about me too?" 

He looked so hopeful. It was really quite amazing to see. It was like he didn't understand the incredible effect he had on women, me included. He actually thought there was a chance that I didn't feel the same. I wanted to laugh, but I didn't. Instead, I pulled one of my hands from his and cupped his cheek. I smiled at him and he smiled back, a little nervously, like any average person who was waiting for an answer after having just poured their heart out.

"Of course I am, idiot." Was my beautifully worded reply. I don't know, I guess I wasn't exactly thinking straight. If you could see the way he was looking at me, you'd understand why I couldn't come up with something a little more... Heart-felt, I guess. 

And then he smiled this wide, dazzling smile. With all his teeth showing and his lips stretched and the crinkling by his eyes. It was gorgeous. He was gorgeous.

He paid for the bill and shooed me out of the diner. I was giggling so much, it was embarrassing. I sounded like a fifth grader. I cringe when I think about it, but he didn't seem to care. We didn't really talk during that car ride, but he wore this huge, wolfish grin. He took me down a road I'd never been before, to a neighborhood across town from mine. This area was made of town houses, apartment and condominium buildings. The area where young people usually started their lives on their own away from their parents. An area I had yet to find myself in. I still lived with my parents and technically, Derek too. Their neighborhoods were made up of medium-sized houses with two car driveways and gardens and mini vans and children and picket fences--A totally different vibe than here. I didn't hate it here, though. I could get used to this place. I could get used to coming here to visit my potential boyfriend or you know, maybe moving in with him and calling this area my home. I don't know what the future had in store for me and Ryan exactly, but it felt... Good. I had this positive feeling, you know? Positive enough that I let him lead me into the building and up seven flights of stairs and into his condo and well, into his bed. I didn't usually do this. There were still a lot of things that I didn't know about Ryan, but I just didn't care. It felt right. He felt right. I could see myself being very happy with him. He was such an amazing guy. Everybody only had good things to say about him, and I kind of liked the jealous stares I got from other girls when he held my hand. 

Hell, I even think Derek liked him...