Status: In Progress...
When I Look At You
Chapter 10: I thought I lost you...
*Addy’s POV*
I looked through the window at Josh as he sat with Steph. The tears were running down my face as Logan held me in his arms. I felt the tears fall from his face onto my head. Then I heard laughing. I pulled out of Logan’s grasp and looked at Rebecca, who stood there laughing. “You find this funny? One of my friends dying and the other completely heart broken over it is funny to you?” I said, getting angrier as I tried to step towards her, only to have Logan hold me back, with the help of Greg, who was comforting Cassie. “Let her go, let her try and hit me.” Rebecca challenged. The anger boiled up in me but before I could do anything, a police officer came over. “I’m here for Rebecca Hurst.” He said, the handcuffs in his hand. “What’s the problem officer?” she asked. “You’re under arrest on counts of murder, reckless endangerment, and leaving the scene of an accident.” He said as he cuffed her. “I’m sorry for your loss.” He said to us as he walked away, Rebecca in front of him. “Doesn’t matter if I go to jail, I got what I wanted.” She cackled. As soon as she was gone I turned to Logan and just collapsed in his arms crying.
*Josh’s POV*
I sat beside her lifeless body, just staring, hoping, praying that this was all just a horrible dream I’d wake up from to see her smiling at me and asking me why I was crying. But this wasn’t a dream and Steph wasn’t going to wake up. I took her lifeless hand into both of mine and kissed it. “Steph, I’m so sorry. This is all my fault. I never should’ve yelled at you. I should have believed you, not Rebecca. I promised when I became your friend that I would never hurt you, that I would protect you from everything. But I failed you, I broke my promise. Steph, I should have told you this a long time ago, but I just never got the courage. But I love you and Steph, I can’t live without you. What am going to do without you here? What am I going to do without hearing your beautiful voice or laugh? What I am going to do without seeing your amazing smile? Steph, I don’t think I can take a day, not to mention a life without you in it everyday. I can’t lose you Steph. Please,please don’t leave me like this!” I said, letting the tears freely fall not caring who saw through the window. I bent down and lightly kissed her cold lips before kissing her forehead. I ran my hand along her face, trying to remember her when she was alive. I would give anything to have her sit up right now and tell me everything was okay. I closed my eyes tight and sat in the chair beside her again and leaned my head against her bed and just cried.
It was silent for a few minutes, aside from me crying when I heard a groan. I looked up and saw that Steph was still lifeless, deciding my mind was just playing tricks on me. I leaned my head back down but then felt someone playing with my hair, running their fingers through it. “Josh…” a soft, raspy voice whispered. “Please tell me this isn’t a dream.” I whispered to myself as I looked up and saw Stephanie, smiling at me, her eyes gleaming. “You’re not dreaming.” She replied. I stood up and hugged her tight. “Oh Stephanie, thank God!” I said as I hugged her tightly and kissed her head repeatedly. “Josh, can’t breathe.” She said, chuckling a bit. I released her. “Sorry.” I said, blushing. She smiled. “What happened? Why are you here?” she asked me, suddenly getting serious as though she remembered something. “Do you remember anything?” I asked her. She nodded. “Only getting into the fight with you and driving away.” She said, and I dropped my head. “You were in a car accident. The driver just drove away and left you there. But it’s okay, they know who did it. I think someone called the cops.” I replied. “Who was it?” Steph asked. I sighed and looked down at my hands. “Rebecca.” I answered. “Oh.” Steph said. I looked at her and took her hands in mine. “Josh, what are you doing?” she questioned. “Just listen to me okay? I was stupid, I was an asshole, and I was a terrible person to you. I should’ve believed you when you said you didn’t do anything to her. I don’t know why I didn’t. I guess I just was ignoring my instincts. But Steph, I want you to know, I never loved her. I have only loved one person my entire life and I almost lost her. I’m not going to let that happen again.” I said. She looked at me confused. “Josh, what are you saying?” she asked. I sighed.
“What I’m saying is that these past few days have made me realize something. What I’ve realized is something that has been there for a long time, something I was afraid to admit.” I answered. “And that would be?” she asked. “I love you Steph, I always have. I almost lost you because I was being stupid and I just can’t believe I did that to you. Steph, I am so sorry for ever hurting you. I love you so much and I promise that from this day on I wont let you ever forget it. I love you so much it hurts, I love you so much that I wouldn’t be able to go a day without you here by my side. I know it’s a lot to take it, but can you please forgive me?” I asked her. She looked at me and I saw the tears in her eyes. “Josh…” she started, and I became nervous.
*Steph’s POV*
I looked at the boy holding my hand in his, the tears coming down my face. Did he really just say those things to me? He’s loved me all along? On the inside I was jumping for joy. I know what I’m going to do… “Josh…”
I looked through the window at Josh as he sat with Steph. The tears were running down my face as Logan held me in his arms. I felt the tears fall from his face onto my head. Then I heard laughing. I pulled out of Logan’s grasp and looked at Rebecca, who stood there laughing. “You find this funny? One of my friends dying and the other completely heart broken over it is funny to you?” I said, getting angrier as I tried to step towards her, only to have Logan hold me back, with the help of Greg, who was comforting Cassie. “Let her go, let her try and hit me.” Rebecca challenged. The anger boiled up in me but before I could do anything, a police officer came over. “I’m here for Rebecca Hurst.” He said, the handcuffs in his hand. “What’s the problem officer?” she asked. “You’re under arrest on counts of murder, reckless endangerment, and leaving the scene of an accident.” He said as he cuffed her. “I’m sorry for your loss.” He said to us as he walked away, Rebecca in front of him. “Doesn’t matter if I go to jail, I got what I wanted.” She cackled. As soon as she was gone I turned to Logan and just collapsed in his arms crying.
*Josh’s POV*
I sat beside her lifeless body, just staring, hoping, praying that this was all just a horrible dream I’d wake up from to see her smiling at me and asking me why I was crying. But this wasn’t a dream and Steph wasn’t going to wake up. I took her lifeless hand into both of mine and kissed it. “Steph, I’m so sorry. This is all my fault. I never should’ve yelled at you. I should have believed you, not Rebecca. I promised when I became your friend that I would never hurt you, that I would protect you from everything. But I failed you, I broke my promise. Steph, I should have told you this a long time ago, but I just never got the courage. But I love you and Steph, I can’t live without you. What am going to do without you here? What am I going to do without hearing your beautiful voice or laugh? What I am going to do without seeing your amazing smile? Steph, I don’t think I can take a day, not to mention a life without you in it everyday. I can’t lose you Steph. Please,please don’t leave me like this!” I said, letting the tears freely fall not caring who saw through the window. I bent down and lightly kissed her cold lips before kissing her forehead. I ran my hand along her face, trying to remember her when she was alive. I would give anything to have her sit up right now and tell me everything was okay. I closed my eyes tight and sat in the chair beside her again and leaned my head against her bed and just cried.
It was silent for a few minutes, aside from me crying when I heard a groan. I looked up and saw that Steph was still lifeless, deciding my mind was just playing tricks on me. I leaned my head back down but then felt someone playing with my hair, running their fingers through it. “Josh…” a soft, raspy voice whispered. “Please tell me this isn’t a dream.” I whispered to myself as I looked up and saw Stephanie, smiling at me, her eyes gleaming. “You’re not dreaming.” She replied. I stood up and hugged her tight. “Oh Stephanie, thank God!” I said as I hugged her tightly and kissed her head repeatedly. “Josh, can’t breathe.” She said, chuckling a bit. I released her. “Sorry.” I said, blushing. She smiled. “What happened? Why are you here?” she asked me, suddenly getting serious as though she remembered something. “Do you remember anything?” I asked her. She nodded. “Only getting into the fight with you and driving away.” She said, and I dropped my head. “You were in a car accident. The driver just drove away and left you there. But it’s okay, they know who did it. I think someone called the cops.” I replied. “Who was it?” Steph asked. I sighed and looked down at my hands. “Rebecca.” I answered. “Oh.” Steph said. I looked at her and took her hands in mine. “Josh, what are you doing?” she questioned. “Just listen to me okay? I was stupid, I was an asshole, and I was a terrible person to you. I should’ve believed you when you said you didn’t do anything to her. I don’t know why I didn’t. I guess I just was ignoring my instincts. But Steph, I want you to know, I never loved her. I have only loved one person my entire life and I almost lost her. I’m not going to let that happen again.” I said. She looked at me confused. “Josh, what are you saying?” she asked. I sighed.
“What I’m saying is that these past few days have made me realize something. What I’ve realized is something that has been there for a long time, something I was afraid to admit.” I answered. “And that would be?” she asked. “I love you Steph, I always have. I almost lost you because I was being stupid and I just can’t believe I did that to you. Steph, I am so sorry for ever hurting you. I love you so much and I promise that from this day on I wont let you ever forget it. I love you so much it hurts, I love you so much that I wouldn’t be able to go a day without you here by my side. I know it’s a lot to take it, but can you please forgive me?” I asked her. She looked at me and I saw the tears in her eyes. “Josh…” she started, and I became nervous.
*Steph’s POV*
I looked at the boy holding my hand in his, the tears coming down my face. Did he really just say those things to me? He’s loved me all along? On the inside I was jumping for joy. I know what I’m going to do… “Josh…”
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