He Dances Inside Of Me

Nick’s POV

After his screaming, Nick had collapsed on his bed and fell asleep crying. Much too early, he was awaked by the sound of his mobile phone.
“God, damn it,” he peeked through his eyelashes and saw it was only 4 AM. Which idiot texted him in the middle of the night, when he was feeling so miserable!? He decided he would look the next morning. But when he tried to fall asleep again, his mind wouldn’t let him. He couldn’t stop thinking about Tyson, him being gay, Tyson, him being ugly, Tyson, that stupid girl and Tyson. He growled, got up from his bed and picked up his phone to check his text.

“Hey Nicky! What’s goin’ on, dude? Haven’t seen you for days. You can tell me anything :)
Peace, Ty.
Btw: My guuurl kisses bad-ass”

WTF!? Calling him by his nickname, talking to him like they’ve known each other for ages and telling about his girls kisses!? Does he wanted to make him feel miserable!? Nick noticed he was crying again, but at the same time he was angry. HE took care of Tyson the first day, and now Tyson told him about his girlfriend in a text! Not even like: “OMG, I’ve a girlfriend!” but sneaky on the end. And, he didn’t want to admit it but deep inside he knew, he was angry at Tyson for not choosing him, but that stupid girl instead.

Seeing he couldn’t sleep anymore and had much on his mind, he picked up his guitar and started playing. That often helped him to clear his mind. First he played some random tunes, and after a while he started playing Addicted by Simple Plan. He played until his alarm went off. He didn’t feel like going to school and face everyone after acting really weird yesterday, but he had to do once, so why not today?

*Time elapse: at school*

“Oh god! Nick, you look horrible!”

“Really thanks, Mike. That’s exactly what I need.” Nick growled. He hadn’t slept well, so he had dark rings under his eyes (which weren’t bloodshot from crying anymore, thank god) and a pale face. He was feeling miserable, to say the least.

“Is this about the same thing as yesterday?” Mike asked worried.

“Yes.”

“Okay, you’re sure you don’t wanna talk about it?”

“Yes. I want to forget it, so give me distraction.”

“Is that a order?” Mike asked laughing slightly, it wasn’t normal for Nick to be so commanding.

“Yes, it is.”

“Okay, let’s talk about you’re party than! Are you gonna invite Amanda too? Since she’s Tyson’s girlfriend, I think he wants to bring her.”

“NO!” Nick nearly screamed. Then he realized how weird that must have sounded, so he added: “It’s a boys night. No girls allowed.”

“Uhm, okay. I get it,” Mike smiled but shot a confused glance at Nick. Nick sighed and shrugged his shoulders.

“I’m in a bad mood. Don’t expect me to act normal.”

“Okay,” Mike sighed. “Look! There’s Chris!”

“Hey guys! Wow. Nick, have you even slept tonight?” Chris stared at Nick with wide eye”s.

“No, not really. This can give you an idea of how you normally look,” Nick put on a fake smile.

“Ow, do I look always that bad?”

“Yes, Chris you do.”

“Wow. Then that would be why I never get a girl! You look horrible!”

“Thanks again. I really appreciate your kindness,” Nick replied sarcastically.

The bell ringed so they all went to their classes. Nick was happy he hasn’t seen Tyson yet. And the same time he wasn’t, he wanted to see Tyson’s beautiful face again. The periods went over pretty fast. Nick just listened to his music, escaping from the real world. When Tyson was in his class he would ignore him, or just give really short answers. He saw Mike give him multiple weird and confused glances. But he wasn’t in the mood to tell him anything, he wondered if he ever would be. In the break Tyson walked towards him. Oh, no. Let him just go away. DON”T let Tyson talk him. And please, don’t let Tyson begin about his behavior from today.

“Hey dude! Why are you acting so strange today? Have I done something wrong?” Oh god. Exactly what he wanted.

“Uhm, no. I’m just, like, in a really bad mood,” He avoided to look to Tyson, so now he was looking at his shoes.

“Can I help with something?” YES! Break up with your girl and kiss me right now!

“No,” Nick snapped at him. “Just go to your girlfriend already.” Nick saw Tyson’s feet disappear, so he decided it was okay to look up again. He immediately saw Tyson kissing and hugging his “Amanda”. He sighed and went to the bathroom, he wanted to be alone with his thoughts for a moment.

There were at the moment a few facts:
1. He was gay
2. He had crush on Tyson
3. Tyson was straight (for as far Nick knew)
4. Tyson had a girlfriend.
5. So, he had to forget about Tyson.

That’s what he would do: Forget about Tyson. He would just act normal, and the crush would fade. Maybe he needed some fun things to distract him from Tyson, but that wouldn’t be that difficult, would it? His heart bled by the thought of never kiss Tyson, but he knew he had no choice. He decided to start with going back to the cafeteria and sit with his friends and laugh again. That laughing was going to be a hard part, but he would try.