Taken and Misused.

A few nights later Stephen received a call from the local authorities asking him to identify a body. I knew what body it was, and I refused to go along with him. I was trying to remember Vaughn as full of life, with a mischievous grin on his lips.

I watched Stephen get in his car from the motel window; he sent me an apologetic glance before driving away. I felt the urge to cry again, I had been crying a lot these past few days. Slowly I was changing; my tears were more of anger than sadness. How could Semyon just kill him? The man was sadistic and evil, and, for the first time in my life, I wanted revenge. Semyon killed the man I loved, threatened me and my family. He ruined my life. I turned away from the window and lashed out with a kick at the night stand by the bed. The lamp and cheap alarm clock flew off of it and crashed to the ground. “Dammit!” my shout seemed to echo in the room, and I was met only by a silence so thick my thoughts had nothing to stop them from making me think of Vaughn.

Vaughn looked at me with a dumbstruck look on his face from the driver’s window, like he was surprised he had found me.

“What do you want?” I asked in an angry tone.

“I came to find you and, well, apologize” he said, grinning like he knew I'd forgive him.

I scoffed and continued walking, I heard the rumble of the mustang’s engine following me. “And you think I’m just going to accept your apology and go on?” I questioned, not looking at him.

“Well that’s what I was hoping for” he said, doubt obvious in his voice as he frowned at me.

“Well too bad, you made a rash assumption and I’m not going to just forgive you so you can quit following me” I said, flashing him a glare with my last words.

“I can’t do that” he said, a grin on his lips.

“And why not?” I asked, rolling my eyes.

“I can’t stop following you until you forgive me” he answered, keeping up with my brisk pace easily. "My karma wouldn't be able to take it," he added in a dramatic tone.

“Well, you’re going to run out of gas sooner or later” I muttered, but he caught it. A sharp honk sounded from behind him, followed by another. A line up had formed behind Vaughn during our conversation. “Can you just go?” I asked, embarrassed because I was the reason he wouldn’t leave.

“Nope, you’re just going to have to bear witness of some bad road rage soon, I don’t think they’re going to put up with this much longer” Vaughn said, his cocky attitude back now that he had this argument going for him.
A long honk made his grin wider I noticed and a few curse words from the car behind him just made him chuckle. He had to be the most annoying person I had ever met.

“Alright, I forgive you Vaughn” I said, but he shook his head.

“I don’t believe you”

“Would you just go!”

“Nope”

“You are being so immature Vaughn”

“If you just sincerely forgave me I’d stop”

“I sincerely forgive you for your rash, judgmental, and mean comment about me last night” I rushed.

“Thank you” he said, and then he sped up for a moment and slipped into a parking spot on the side of the street and got out. The people he had been holding up all yelled very colorful curse words at him but he just ignored them.

“I forgave you, now what do you want?” I asked, as he walked up to me.

“I want to buy you coffee to apologize for what I just put you through” he said, his grin getting wider.

“What are you going to apologize for next?” I muttered as I continued walking down the street.

“I’ll think of something” he said, either oblivious to my annoyance or just ignoring it.

I slumped down against the wall by the door of the motel room, leaning my head back and just staring in front of me. My eyes fell on the bathroom and another memory overcame my tortured mind.

“You’re hungry, go grab a shower, I’ll make something for you to eat” he said, pulling out a few things from my fridge.

“You were just talking about me trusting you too much and now you’re telling me to go take a shower and leave you alone in my apartment?” I asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Trust me” he said, facing me straight on as he said it, the full weight of his gaze falling onto my crystalline eyes.

For some reason I did.

The tears that began to fall made me slam my fist against the floor and another memory slipped into my mind.

“Why me?” I asked, sitting on the bed of our ratty hotel room with my head in my hands. “Because, I love you,” Vaughn said, his voice husky as he answered my question.

“Why!” I yelled, releasing my pent up frustration. I kicked the lamp once more and the light inside shattered, the little pieces of glass crunched under my tattered, second hand boots as I went over to my duffle bag. I wasn’t going to sit around here and wait for Stephen to come back and tell me to go on as if nothing happened. I couldn’t just forget about Vaughn, I couldn’t stop thinking about him for more than ten minutes. And I couldn’t look into Stephen’s eyes when they looked so much like those of Semyon’s, I knew it wasn’t Stephen’s fault but I just needed to start anew. I wasn’t the same person so why keep going on like nothing happened?

I needed a change, a big one, and I needed revenge.

My duffle bag was packed in no more than five minutes and I had snatched some cash from Stephen’s little stockpile. It wasn’t like he’d miss it. Stuffing the cash in my pocket, I slung my duffle bag over my shoulder and opened the motel room door. However, I couldn’t move, I couldn’t just leave Stephen without an explanation. He at least deserved that. Turning back around, I set my bag on the floor and went over to the little notepad left out on the dresser by the motel. I picked up the pen and began to write what I wanted to be the last thing I ever said to Stephen:

Stephen,
I’m sorry but I can’t just forget about Vaughn. I loved him deeply. I know what I am setting out to do isn’t smart, or safe, but I have to. Vaughn did it for me, I have to do it for him. I’ll be forever grateful for your help Stephen, but I never want to see you again. Don’t try to find me; don’t try to contact me in any way. Just forget I ever existed. I’m sorry.
Elisabeth

I looked the note over and all I could think was that this wasn’t right. Stephen was going through so much trouble for me. But that was exactly it, I was ruining Stephen’s life too. I was a disease that killed.

I left the note on top of his bag and left with mine, closing the motel door behind me. This was it, I was going out on my own, my family probably thought I was dead because I had been missing for a little over a month, the only person who really knew me was....dead, and I had no idea where Nathan or the others were. I was alone.

The cold morning chill slipped into the open front of my jacket as I made my way over to the main road to sit down on one of the benches by the bus stop. It only took thirty minutes for one to roll to a stop in front of me, Stephen still hadn’t come back and I was glad for it because I knew he would have talked me out of this. “Where to blondie?” the bus driver said with a cheerful grin, I didn’t return the expression.
“New York,” I said quietly. I needed closure, and there was only one place in the world that could give it to me right now.

“That ain’t for a few hours, so you make yourself comfortable,” he said, gesturing for her to take a seat.

I nodded and sat down in the back of the bus just as it started moving once more. I put my duffle bag in the seat next to me and pulled my hood over my head and leaned it back in an effort to get some sleep. The minute I closed my eyes the memory of Vaughn standing alone in the middle of the warehouse, his eyes so forgiving and peaceful, just before Semyon shot a bullet through his heart flashed before my eyes. I jumped in my seat and my eyes flew open, it felt like my heart was in my throat.

“You alright dearie?”

I looked over to see an old woman sitting in the back of the bus in the row across the aisle from me. She was the one who had spoken to me.

A shaky breath slipped from my lips and before I could process a lie, the truth fell out. “No, I’m not,” I said softly, looking at my hands in my lap.

“What has got you all troubled, a girl with a pretty face like yours shouldn’t be frowning,” she said, situating her large, floral purse on her lap.

“I just lost the man I love,” I said, my voice shaky with tears that didn’t come, “and I feel....I feel alone,” I added, looking over at the woman. I don’t know what I was praying for in that moment, advice? Guidance? Maybe a miracle? Or if I was even praying for something at all. But in that moment, this old woman seemed to answer a prayer I had never prayed.

The old woman chuckled softly, leaning back in her seat with a tiredness that always came with age. “Unable are the loved to die. For love is immortality,” she said softly, then she glanced at me and raised an eyebrow. “Do you know who said that?” She asked expectantly.

“No,” I said, looking over at her.

“Emily Dickinson did, a wise woman she was,” the old woman said, her voice sure of her words.

“It doesn’t make any sense, those we love can die,” said, crossing my arms. This woman was just being absurd.

She laughed softly once more, reaching across the aisle to place her hand on my shoulder. “I have lost my fair share of loved ones dearie, when you live to be as old as me you’ll understand why. And I know that just because I love them does not mean they will be immortal in a physical form. Everyone dies, but no one ever really knows when it will happen. But I know that the ones I love are still living on in my heart, and I will always have them there.”

“But that’s not enough, he was the first man I ever loved,” I said, not sure as to why I was suddenly spilling my heart out to this woman.

She gave my shoulder a reassuring squeeze before sitting back in her seat. “Time heals all wounds, even those of the death of one’s first love,” I scoffed at her words, but she didn’t let my disbelief stop her. “It may not seem like it now, not when the wound is still so raw. But there are others out there who will love you just as much, maybe even more, and you’ll never see them through the sorrow and remorse over this first love of yours.” I didn’t know what to say, would I find someone else? The idea seemed absurd, there was no one else who could even amount to the person Vaughn was. Right? Or was my anger and sadness going to blind me from any route leading to happiness? What if a happy ending was staring me right in the face and I couldn’t take it?

“What do I do?” I whispered, because I my throat was tight from the urge to cry.

“Live your life.”

I snapped my head up and looked at the woman, her words were so much like the ones Vaughn had made me promise to just days ago. “I won’t tell you to forget this man, he will always exist inside of you, but you have every right to be happy again when you find that reason to be happy. Don’t you think this man would want you to be happy?” she asked.

“His name was Vaughn,” I said softly, looking up at her once I was finished, “Vaughn Hart,” I added, nodding slightly to assure myself. “And he actually made me promise I would be happy before he.....” I couldn’t finish the sentence, and the woman understood that. She smiled gently, it was one of those smiles that only older people have. It’s one that makes you feel like everything is going to be alright.

“Then full fill your promise to him,” she said with that same comforting smile on her lips.

I wanted to say that I would, that the moment I got off this train I would return to ballet and dance because I loved it. I wanted to tell her I would find another man who I could love almost as much as Vaughn and be happy. I wanted to say I would keep my promise to Vaughn starting today. But I couldn’t. I couldn’t be happy until Semyon was where he belonged, dead and in a grave. The thought sent a chill down my spine, I had never thought something like that, and I scared myself when I realized that I really did want Semyon ruined.

“Well, this is my stop, remember what I said will you? An old woman like me doesn’t find too much to be proud of, but if you can keep that promise to this Vaughn fellow, I’m sure you’d feel better.” The woman said, smiling at me and getting off the bus in a slow walk.

“What if I can’t keep my promise. At least not yet?” I said softly, even though I knew she couldn’t hear me.

------------------------------------------------------

When I got off the bus it was late at night, my phone had thirteen missed calls, twelve voicemails, and five texts. All from Stephen, and all of which I did not respond to. I was going to stay true to my note, I did not want to speak to him or see him ever again. I paid my bus fare and got off the bus. I was back in New York, surrounded by bright lights, noisy people, smoggy weather, and busy traffic. Just like it was when I had first stepped off my plane from Paris. But there was one thing missing. A messy haired street racer with a passion for causing trouble.

As I walked down the street, still unsure as to what the next step of my plan was, a hand sealed around my wrist and tugged me into an ally. I opened my mouth to scream but a hand sealed over my lips. The alley smelled like old trash and rat feces. I could barely see my captor, I knew it was a male by his build, he towered over me and had intimidating, broad shoulders, but that could be any man. I bit his hand hard and he yanked it away from me with a frustrated curse, but the curse was not in English, it was in Russian.

“Who are you?” I demanded, reaching my hands up to shove him away from me but he grabbed them and pinned them against the wall I was already pushed up against. I felt anger roiling up inside me like a snake poised to attack.

“I’ve keeping an eye on you little miss,” he said, leaning in towards me, “my name is Aleksander by the way.”

“Under your own accord?” I asked, ignoring his little introduction.

The man chuckled, “Of course not, but I’m not going to tell you who told me to,” he teased in a sing song voice

I spat in his face, taking him off guard and making him release one of my wrists to wipe the spit off his face. “You are really infuriating,” he muttered as the passing headlights of a car lit him up from behind. Suddenly the name matched a face, Aleksander was one of the men in line with Semyon. One of his filthy lackeys.

“Semyon sent you.” I stated and Aleksander chuckled, still holding one of my wrists against the wall.

“And here I thought you were just a dumb little girl,” Aleksander mocked.

I shot my leg up between his, hitting the man’s biggest weak spot. Aleksander crumpled down to the alley ground with a low groan of pain. I planted my foot on his chest when he tried to sit up and leaned over so I was closer to him. “Tell Semyon that I will kill him, he is going to regret what he did to Vaughn,” I said, my words nearly shaking from anger. If Semyon wasn’t going to leave me alone, then I had no reason at all to leave him alone.

“You really think you can kill Semyon Ivanov?” Aleksander groaned out, grinning despite his current ache. “Ballet isn’t going to put an end to him, so what is your master plan?” Aleksander said, trying to eliminate my sudden determination.

“One can never stop learning,” I said threateningly before I swiftly left the alley, readjusting my duffle bag on my shoulder as I went.

Soon I was standing in front of Vaughn’s home, the abandoned warehouse that was now empty of life. I knew this is where I had to be. There was no one out on the street as I crossed it, and when I got to the front door of the warehouse I wasn’t surprised to find it locked. I thought about breaking the lock off with some sort of heavy item like a large rock but the thought of destroying any part of this home made my heart hurt. Instead I slipped two bobby pins out of my hair, which let my hair fall out of its bun and across my back. I bent both bobby pins straight and slipped the first one in the lock and then the second one. Vaughn had taught me this over the month we had been on the run, I had asked him to teach me when we were stealing a motel room for the night since Stephen hadn’t gotten the chance to refill our cash funds. Granted I wasn’t as good as Vaughn was, it took him less than a minute, I sat there picking around in that lock for about fifteen minutes, probably more, before the click of success came and I turned the two bobby pins counterclockwise as if they were a key and the deadbolt slid back.

I took a deep breath, slipping the two bobby pins into the pocket of my jeans and tentatively opening the door. It took me a moment to find the light switch but when I did the whole building was suddenly flooded in a wash of light. I blinked for a moment to adjust my eyes and then I closed the door and slumped down against it until I was sitting on the dusty floor. The home was empty, there were still some dirty dishes in the makeshift kitchen and a thin layer of dust seemed to coat everything. I stood back up and wiped away tears that had fallen down my cheeks at the sight of Vaughn’s things. The sound of the phone ringing made a small scream emit from my lips, my heart was racing as I stared at the phone on his kitchen counter. I pressed a hand over my heart to try and slow it as I slowly made my way over to the phone. I reached my hand out to pick it up but froze, should I answer it? I didn’t even know who was on the other end. I swallowed my fear and grasped the receiver and brought it up to my ear.

“Hello?” I asked tentatively.

“Vaughn? Is that you? It’s Zack” the voice sounded young and male.

“No um, Vaughn past away a few days ago,” I said, the words strained as I forced them out.

“Oh geez, I knew something bad had happened, shit man,” Zack said, and I knew he was upset by the tone of his voice. “Who are you then?” he asked, suddenly sounding suspicious.

Who was I? Was I just his friend or girlfriend? Vaughn had never asked me to be his girlfriend, but he had told me he loved me. “I was his girlfriend,” I said softly, sitting on one of the stools by the kitchen counter.

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s alright,” I said, “Was there something you needed from him?”

“Well, I feel like a jerk for bringing this up knowing what you must be going through but, Vaughn left me with Glory before he left and now my landlord is saying Glory can’t stay at my place and I can’t bring him to the pound, I’d never forgive myself-”

I stopped him there, “I’ll pick him up, where do you live?” He gave me his address and I wrote it down on a note pad next to the phone. “I’ll be there tomorrow morning,” I said, setting down my pen and tearing the note off the notepad.

“Thanks, and I’m so sorry, Vaughn was a good man,” Zack said, obviously trying to make me feel better.

“Yeah, I know he was,” I said softly before hanging up.