This Could Be All I've Waited For

“I'm so glad we're finally getting this done.” Alex grinned to me, somewhat nervously on the day of the meeting, the next month. I nodded in agreement, as we arrived outside the solicitor's office. Jess hadn't turned up yet so we sat on the chairs just opposite.

A stern looking woman walked towards us in navy a skirt-suit. “Mr and Mrs Gaskarth?” She questioned, looking at out entwined hands with a confused expression.

“Oh, no, I'm Alex but this isn't Jess, we're just waiting for her. This is Bianca.” He explained.

“Ah.” She nodded, turning on her heel and entered her office without another word.

Alex looked round at me, his eyes wide and gulped, laughing I put my head on his shoulder “She's scary.” He mumbled.

“Come on, you're a big boy now! Don't let the scary woman frighten you.” I teased.

“Shut up,” He grinned, leaning his head on mine. Neither of us had got much sleep the night before, he spent most of it pacing backwards and forwards by the bed and the rest getting in and out, biting his nails. He had been worried.

Eventually Jess appeared with Jack, her stomach was huge now, the baby was due any minute and she was waddling. Jack sat awkwardly in the seat next to me as the other who were beckoned into the office.

We sat there for around 10 minutes in silence, just as I opened my mouth to wonder out loud, how long they were going to be when Alex burst out of the door, looking a mix between shocked, worried, scared and confused.

“The baby! Coming! Now! Bianca,” He threw me his car keys and did an action that looked vaguely like unlocking a car and getting inside, “Wait for me,” He took a deep breath. “Jack, you're driving Jess to the hospital.” And with that he left the room.

Jack looked at me. “Shit, fuck, oh god.” Standing up, he looked like he was going to faint. “Let's go.” We ran out of the building and into the car park, Alex's car was on the other side of the lot from Jack's and we both went our separate ways.

“See you at the hospital!” I shouted after him, he still looked shell shocked. I unlocked the door and climbed in, a few minutes later Alex threw himself in, holding his hand out for the keys, putting them in his hand he started the car and sped off, after Jack's already speeding car.

A risky journey there and we arrived at the hospital, Jess was put into a wheelchair, into a room and into a bed. We were told to leave as a doctor arrived, a big grin on his face.

Alex sat on the end of a row of empty chairs in the waiting room, Jack sat a chair away and I took the middle seat, getting ready for yet another awkward silence. After half an hour I'd had enough.

“Who wants coffee?” I asked.

“I'll come,” Alex sighed, standing up with me.

“No, no you won't, you'll stay here and you'll talk to Jack, when I come back I want no awkward silences. Jack, coffee?” I put my foot down.

“Please.” He whispered, looking at his hands. I suddenly felt sorry for him, all on his own here, Alex had me but Jack's other half was in another room, having, maybe his baby.

“Okay, Alex, sit down, you're not going anywhere.” I nodded, leaving the room to find the little room with the coffee machine and some vending machines. I took double the time to make three coffees and get some biscuits, just so I could make sure they'd actually spoken to each other and resolved some of the hate.

Secretly, I was hoping they hadn't beaten each other up.

By the time I got back they were still in silence and I gave up. It had been an hour and a half since we were ushered out of the room, they now allowed us all back in.

“Alex, I think I'm going to get Noah to come pick me up, I'll leave you guys too it.” I smiled.

“No!”

“Well, I don't feel like I should be here...”

“But...who's going to...look, please don't go, I need you here.”

“Lex...” I sighed, I really didn't want to be where I was. “This is nothing to do with me, this baby.”

“You could be it's step mom, how could you even say that?” He looked hurt.

Thinking about it for a minute, I looked into his eyes, he looked out of his depth. I could tell he needed me there. “Get in the room then.” I mumbled, poking him in the ribs.

“Thank you,” He whispered into my hair before turning and entering the room.

–

9 hours later and we were all bored of the coffee, bored of the view, bored of waiting for the baby. 10 hours was a long time to be waiting in a hospital and we were told it was another 2 before the average time of labour, we were all fed up. Especially Jess, she was wandering around the room, hands on her back, swearing every so often. A Nurse came in in regular intervals to check how few and far between the contractions were.

Suddenly everything happened quickly. 13 hours after arriving we were asked who the labour buddy was. Jack, naturally, which pissed Alex off, understandably, but it was chosen so fast he didn't even have a chance to moan. We both sat in the waiting room again, I hand my hand gripped around his, my head on his shoulder again, he was sat bolt upright, biting the nails on his free hand. We lost track of time and Alex began pacing the room as he had done the night before.

“Oh my god, how long can this take?” A few people smirked at him, a group of people even laughed out loud, it had been four hours since they'd been told to go and wait outside, it was time to start pushing.

“Sit down, come on,” I pulled him down next to me. “It won't be long now.” Putting my arms around him he sighed.

“I just want to see him. Or her. I just need to know that my kid is alright.”

Opening my mouth to tell him, for the hundredth time that day, that it might not be his he snapped at me, “B, I know it might not be mine, but I just want to see it okay?”

“Okay,” I mumbled, deciding not to say anything else.

What seemed like an eternity later Jack finally walked into the waiting room. “It's a girl.” He grinned, tears running down his face.

“Can I see her?” Alex choked out, his eyes looking moist too. Jack nodded. I was pulled into Jess's room without wanting to go. She was sat in the bed, looking tired, sweat making her hair stick to her face as she panted. In her arms was a smallest thing I'd ever seen, it just looked like a bundle of blankets, a tear fell on them from Jess's face, the baby screamed again, her little face pink and contorted but still gorgeous. Alex practically sobbed, running forward, his arms outstretched.

Jess handed him the baby without a word and Alex sat on the side of the bed, a smile slapped on his face. Backing out of the room, I smiled at everyone, feeling as though they needed some time on their own. Jess looked at me just before I ducked out. 'She's beautiful' I mouthed, pointing to the hall behind me.

'Thank you' she mouthed back, fresh tears covering her face as she nodded, understanding why I was leaving, I walked out of the automatic hospital doors, into the warm sun and I sat on the wall feeling overwhelmed.