I Will Never Let You Go
One of One
Sara,
I miss you, but I am getting better.
I miss the way your nose crinkled when you laughed at the stupid jokes you had heard a million and one times. I remember the way your eyes lit up when someone told them. I miss the way you would cling to me and beg me not to leave some nights when I had to and the way you would cry on my shoulder. I wish I would have stayed longer now and told you I loved you one more time. I do you know, I always will love you Sara.
I used to be weak, but I am stronger now.
Every motion and process in life brought to me the shuddering, heart stopping feeling that you would never do it again. Every activity sent me into another batch of tears and shakes. I was out of school for over a year because of it, but don’t worry, I caught up, I graduate this spring. Eventually, I learned, you run out of new processes, new foods, new months, new seasons. I know there will always be something hard but I’ll be ready.
I used to be alone, but now I am loved.
Do you remember James? We got together as you always said we would. When I graduate, we plan to move to a small house in the country. We couldn’t bear to be farther from you. He misses you too Sara. We visit you every weekend together, but you knew that already. We leave the sunflowers you always loved so much, but you knew that too. I hope you didn’t mind that I made them bury you in that old dress of yours the one with the huge flowers all over it. I knew you loved it and you said you’d take it to the grave with you. I just never thought it would be so soon.
I’m afraid that you’ll forget about me. I’m afraid you already did. I’m afraid that I pushed you over the edge and you’re gone because of me. Most of all, I’m afraid that it will happen again. I’m afraid I’ll blink and someone else will be gone. I know I wouldn’t be able to take that.
Sara, you were amazing and the world is at a loss without you. I love you Sara and even though I may not cry for you constantly as I used to, I will never let you go.
Yours in eternity,
Kaitlyn.
I miss you, but I am getting better.
I miss the way your nose crinkled when you laughed at the stupid jokes you had heard a million and one times. I remember the way your eyes lit up when someone told them. I miss the way you would cling to me and beg me not to leave some nights when I had to and the way you would cry on my shoulder. I wish I would have stayed longer now and told you I loved you one more time. I do you know, I always will love you Sara.
I used to be weak, but I am stronger now.
Every motion and process in life brought to me the shuddering, heart stopping feeling that you would never do it again. Every activity sent me into another batch of tears and shakes. I was out of school for over a year because of it, but don’t worry, I caught up, I graduate this spring. Eventually, I learned, you run out of new processes, new foods, new months, new seasons. I know there will always be something hard but I’ll be ready.
I used to be alone, but now I am loved.
Do you remember James? We got together as you always said we would. When I graduate, we plan to move to a small house in the country. We couldn’t bear to be farther from you. He misses you too Sara. We visit you every weekend together, but you knew that already. We leave the sunflowers you always loved so much, but you knew that too. I hope you didn’t mind that I made them bury you in that old dress of yours the one with the huge flowers all over it. I knew you loved it and you said you’d take it to the grave with you. I just never thought it would be so soon.
I’m afraid that you’ll forget about me. I’m afraid you already did. I’m afraid that I pushed you over the edge and you’re gone because of me. Most of all, I’m afraid that it will happen again. I’m afraid I’ll blink and someone else will be gone. I know I wouldn’t be able to take that.
Sara, you were amazing and the world is at a loss without you. I love you Sara and even though I may not cry for you constantly as I used to, I will never let you go.
Yours in eternity,
Kaitlyn.
♠ ♠ ♠
This is a fictional letter written for rainy days. Letter writing contest.