I'm Still That Confused Little Girl, but It's so Much More Confusing Now

I smiled as I watched Harry try to teach Neville Expelliarmus. He really was a very good teacher, Neville was finally starting to get some of the spells. For some reason Expelliarmus was giving him problems, but he’d mastered some of the other charms.

I was sat on one of the windowsills in the Room of Requirement watching the various members of Dumbledore’s Army practicing spells. This was Hermione’s genius idea to protect our friends and school-friends from death eaters and he-who-must-not-be-named. Harry was going to teach us how to stay alive. He was a good teacher. A bit weak maybe; not willing to shout.

Hermione hadn’t told Harry I had left their Quidditch practice. I could’ve kissed her when I found out she hadn’t. Her reasoning was that I had gone and tried at least. She asked why I’d left, I said it was my Dad and she didn’t push it. She never pushed. None of them ever did.

Everything was pretty much back to normal now. Well, with Harry and Ron anyway. I still found it extremely unsettling to see Draco around school, I stayed away from him as much as I could. As far as I could tell, Harry, Ron and Hermione had silently decided it was fear of getting into another duel with him. I was perfectly happy to let them believe that.

Harry glanced up at me from below and gestured for me to come down, the windowsill was pretty high up, I jumped down and landed next to him.

"What's up Professor Potter." I said, poking my tongue out at him. He grinned and pointed over to Cho.

"Can you help her? She needs to flick her wand a li-"

"No. I'll help Neville. You help Cho."

"Bu-"

"Go Harry." I said, pushing him toward her. He bit the inside of his lip. I leant forward and lowered my voice to a whisper. "She likes you. You like her. Just go over there Harry." He did go over, leaving me with Neville.

This was our last lesson before term was over and everyone disappeared off to their own homes. And I would be alone at Hogwarts again. Once a year, every year, I got to spend all my time in the library with the many books that lived there. I figured I might try out the dragon books this year. I had always been fascinated by dragons. I'd met Charlie, Ron's brother last year, and I immediately fell in love with both him and the stories he used to tell. Obviously it was just a crush, I was 14 after all, but I still harboured a large soft spot for Charlie Weasley. Hmm, my soft spots were growing. I had to put an end to that.

At that moment my wand flew from my hand and across the room. I watched it arc then looked back at Neville in surprise. True, I hadn't been paying any attention to him, or trying to block it, but still, it was an improvement. It was his first disarm since we’d started the DA. "Harry!" Neville called, his voice full of glee. "I did it, I disarmed her!" Harry glanced over at me, I nodded and held up my hands to show him Neville really had. Everyone started grinning and applauding Neville. I smiled, congratulated him myself, then went across the room to fetch my wand.

"That seems a good a place as any to wrap this up." Called Harry to the room. Everyone shut up pretty promptly. "Well, you know, everyone’s made brilliant progress and just, keep practicing! And have a Merry Christmas." Everyone clapped and started thinning out. I noticed Cho across the room, not looking like she was going anywhere fast, this was followed by seeing the Weasley twins closing in on Harry.

I zipped across the room and intercepted them, leading them quietly away, indicating Cho and Harry. They grinned simultaneously and followed me out.

"Ooh, Potty's getting it oooooon." Peeves sang from the doorway of the Room of Requirement, for some reason we had found Peeves couldn't get in to the room. Odd, he didn't seem too interested in giving away what we were doing with Dumbledore’s Army to any of the staff. I kind of felt a bit of kinship to him for keeping us secret. That was until he dropped a bucket of stale Butterbeer over me on my way to Charms last week. Now I hated him again.

I shot a curse at Peeves and smiled back at Harry, he made a grateful face and closed the door behind us. Me, the Weasleys and Herms walked back to the common room together, laughing and joking like normal.

Around halfway back Draco appeared with Crabbe and Goyle, I met his eyes and he smiled momentarily before being forced to wipe his face clean by a look from Goyle. I kept my face blank, before giving him a quick smile so no one would notice. He disappeared through a door further down the corridor, with Goyle and Crabbe sniggering at something he'd said.

I turned and listened to a joke that Fred was trying to tell me. I did enjoy listening to Fred's jokes. It was odd really, both the twins were mischievous, but Fred was more jokey and George was more pranky. Between the two of them they made an unbeatable team. If I had ever wanted brothers, they would have been like the Weasley twins.

“- so then the dwarf said he was inhibited.” I laughed. Unfortunately I had missed the beginning of the joke with my inner babble, so I had no idea what the joke was or why the hell that end line was funny. But hey, I knew the twins were funny, so why did I need to hear the joke?

“Oi. Smith.” A slick voice called from behind me, I clenched my teeth and turned to look at Blaise Zabini, who had neatly appeared behind us in silence. “A word?”

“No Zabini.”

“Why?”

“Because she’s busy.” Fred replied, stepping in front of me.

“Very busy.” George added, joining his brother.

“Yeah.” Ron added, stepping forward slightly. It was a little weak bless him, but he was at least trying.
Hermione glanced at me and mouthed Why does he want you?, I shrugged. For once this year, the shrug was entirely genuine; I had no idea what Blaise wanted.

“Miss Smith. I entirely suggest you pull in your red-headed terriers. I want a word. Nothing more.”

“Well considering every time I get near a green-cloaked-snake this year I get attacked, forgive me if I don’t follow you into a darkened room.” I pulled on Fred and George’s arms. “Come on red-heads. I think we were going to spend the night in the warm red room we call our home.” I turned and walked away, my hands pulling the Weasleys’ away from him. Hermione pulled Ron away.

I glanced back at Blaise as we rounded the corner. As expected he was looking right at me. Pocket he mouthed, unsmiling, before turning and glided away. I frowned and patted my pocket, there was a piece of paper folded up in the leg of my jeans. He was getting seriously skilled at that. I rolled my eyes.

“What is all that about? What have the Slytherins got against you this year?” I glanced at Ron, who was looking at me inquisitively. “They seem obsessed.” I shrugged.

“To be honest Ron, I have no idea.” I nudged him with my side and smiled. “I’ll deal with it though. Don’t worry about me.”

“Who said I was worried about you? More like my own neck.” He replied with a grin. I smiled faintly.

“Sometimes Mr Weasley, just… sometimes. I really really love you.” He smiled in a sarcastic coy manner then laughed. And just like that he had moved on, talking about Percy again. For someone who hated his brother, he talked about him an awful lot.