You Just Love to Hate Me

I didn't know how to act. Where to turn. I looked at Craig; he was wearing an expression that looked as if it could be Worry and Confusion's lovechild. He tried to take the letter from Max, only to have it pulled away and into his chest, Max glowering like an over protective guard dog. He backed off, and then stood up from the table abruptly, disappearing into the bunk room area without another word.

“What do you think was in that letter?” I asked Craig, finally breaking the uneasy silence. We walked into the front of the bus and sat down on the couch; it creaked and protested under our combined weight, causing us to end up falling against each other as the cushions gave out under us. I inhaled a lungful of his wonderful smell, trying to memories everything about him. My head was rested against his shoulder.

“I don't know.” Craig admitted, chewing his bottom lip gently. He was sat bolt upright, the same worried expression from earlier still in place. “But what I do know is, I'm worried about him. Very worried.”

“How comes?” I tried for sincerity, but my immediate question gave my bitterness away.

“Well, first off, he didn't say anything about us” I blushed lightly at his use of the plural. It meant, to me, that we were a unit. More than friends. “When we walked on the bus. And what caused him to get so drunk last night? There has to be a reason, and there's no celebration. We haven't finished tour yet. Something's not right.”

“Maybe he's jealous.” I suggested gently. Craig sighed and frowned, not wanting to believe me. “Maybe he saw us together, and was envious of me...”

“I think you might be right...” Craig admitted. We sat in silence for a good five minutes, each left to our own thoughts.

What Craig was thinking about, I'll never know. But what I do know is that there was a niggling in the back of my mind, and it just wouldn't go away, no matter how hard I tried to concentrate on something else.

So I decided to jump in the deep end and just ask.

“What am I to you Craig?”

“Huh?” Confusion lurked in his chocolate eyes, and his eyebrows furrowed; a familiar look to me-one that Craig always wore when he was utterly baffled by something. Or someone.

“How much do I mean to you? Am I just your best friend, or something more than that?”

“Oh...” Understanding brushed his features and, to my disappointment, he looked away and down at the floor, studying intently at his feet.

After five minutes, when I hadn't received any more of an answer, I got up to leave, tears already prickling the backs of my eyes.

How could he?
How could he of treated me like that, so special, and then, when it came down to it, it turns out that I am no more than a friend to him after all.

A game. An amusing game for him to play because he'd gotten bored.

“No...Monte..” A hand whipped out and tugged me down again, onto Craig's lap. He whispered into my ear, sending a delicious shiver down my spine.

“Can you just get the rejection talk over and done with please? It'll hurt less...” I couldn't disguise my sorrow; the tears building up caused my voice to rise an octave higher.

He planted a soft kiss on my ear. “There is no rejection speech. Because...” Craig kissed me again, this time the point just below my ear. “I care about you a hell of a lot Bryan Monte Money. In fact..”

The third kiss, lower on my neck, sent an even bigger shiver down my spine.

“I'd even go so far to say that I am in love with you. You are my everything” A fourth kiss; he'd reached my collarbone by now. I couldn't believe what he was telling me. “You are the reason I get up in the morning. My sun. My moon. My stars. I love you”

A kiss was dealt after each sentence, and at the last one, my breathing hitched. It became uneven and shallow; I was struggling to take in what he'd just told me. I couldn't believe it. I honestly couldn't believe it. A man as gorgeous, as perfect as Craig said he loved me? Wow.

And that's exactly what I said. More, gasped, in fact.

Craig giggled at this, and pulled me tighter into his chest, if that was possible. I felt like I was almost stuck to him like glue. He twisted me round to face him, kissing me full on my mouth. He slipped his tongue gently inside, before pulling away, causing me to grumble a little from the lack of contact.

He looked into my eyes, his own sparkling and full of joy. “Will you be my boyfriend?”

“Yes!” I didn't need asking twice. He laid back on the couch, me still wrapped in his arms, and sighed contentedly.

This was how it should be.

And for the moment, Max was completely forgotten.