Status: sleepwalking...
Sleepwalking Past Hope
Love in Limbo
What was I going to do?
I couldn’t perform the task myself, surly. I was too weak to even support myself, let alone her limp body in my arms. As I sat, my knees to the floor, her blood running over my hands and in my veins, I cried out for help. My voice was unrecognizable. After what I had done I didn’t think I knew myself very well anymore. I thought I was in control; thought I had all the answers to my own problems. I thought I could protect her. Obviously I was wrong. I couldn’t protect anyone. I’d never be able to love her the way she loves me.
‘Enough of this self loathing’, my mind told me. I called for help once again, only to realize that would do me no good.
“Linde, I need you.”
The thought was as clear in my mind as I could make it. I hoped he would hear me. Please hear me…
In the second that my plea drifted off into space there was a cold, swift, blow of air behind me. In it stood Linde, only he was not alone. In his arms was a small girl, no higher than my knee. Olivia.
My body froze as I turned to face him, my shame exuding from every pore. He quickly lifted his hand to shelter his daughter, her head buried in his chest. I was now more ashamed than ever. The way he protected her was only natural, but I never thought the threat would be me. Never in a million years would I harm such a creature. Then again, seeing me in this state would surly taint her image of me forever.
“Olivia, I…” but she was gone before I could speak. I looked to him for an explanation. His face was plastered with a sneer of disappointment. I felt my heart sink for the second time today.
“She just learned today…you’re lucky she heard you.”
“Where did she go?”
“Home…Ville what have you done?”
“I couldn’t help myself…the need was too strong, I wanted to…” in an instant he was at my side lifting Emma out of my arms in one swift motion, faster than I ever could.”
“Every second we waste talking, the shorter her time becomes.” With that he began to walk away from me with her securely wrapped in his arms. He turned to look at me, the look of pity clear in his eyes, yet it was a hurtful gaze at the same time. As if to say, “you’ve ruined everything”…and I had.
“I trust you can get yourself home.” With that he they were gone.
I only felt it fitting to fly home. It was the easiest and fastest way to get there. I knew he wouldn’t wait for me, so I wanted to be there when he did it.
This was a nightmare within a nightmare.
I couldn’t perform the task myself, surly. I was too weak to even support myself, let alone her limp body in my arms. As I sat, my knees to the floor, her blood running over my hands and in my veins, I cried out for help. My voice was unrecognizable. After what I had done I didn’t think I knew myself very well anymore. I thought I was in control; thought I had all the answers to my own problems. I thought I could protect her. Obviously I was wrong. I couldn’t protect anyone. I’d never be able to love her the way she loves me.
‘Enough of this self loathing’, my mind told me. I called for help once again, only to realize that would do me no good.
“Linde, I need you.”
The thought was as clear in my mind as I could make it. I hoped he would hear me. Please hear me…
In the second that my plea drifted off into space there was a cold, swift, blow of air behind me. In it stood Linde, only he was not alone. In his arms was a small girl, no higher than my knee. Olivia.
My body froze as I turned to face him, my shame exuding from every pore. He quickly lifted his hand to shelter his daughter, her head buried in his chest. I was now more ashamed than ever. The way he protected her was only natural, but I never thought the threat would be me. Never in a million years would I harm such a creature. Then again, seeing me in this state would surly taint her image of me forever.
“Olivia, I…” but she was gone before I could speak. I looked to him for an explanation. His face was plastered with a sneer of disappointment. I felt my heart sink for the second time today.
“She just learned today…you’re lucky she heard you.”
“Where did she go?”
“Home…Ville what have you done?”
“I couldn’t help myself…the need was too strong, I wanted to…” in an instant he was at my side lifting Emma out of my arms in one swift motion, faster than I ever could.”
“Every second we waste talking, the shorter her time becomes.” With that he began to walk away from me with her securely wrapped in his arms. He turned to look at me, the look of pity clear in his eyes, yet it was a hurtful gaze at the same time. As if to say, “you’ve ruined everything”…and I had.
“I trust you can get yourself home.” With that he they were gone.
I only felt it fitting to fly home. It was the easiest and fastest way to get there. I knew he wouldn’t wait for me, so I wanted to be there when he did it.
This was a nightmare within a nightmare.