Exhale

The ruckus from the lower level woke Holly from her sleep. She groaned, mumbling a few obscenities and curled over into the twin bed. When the noise didn’t die down she grew frustrated, telling Garrett to shut up while she slept. She didn’t realize until after she opened her eyes that he was still sleeping and that the noise’s source was her mother screaming downstair.

Obviously the Thomas residence hadn’t changed much since she moved away. Her mother still woke at the crack of dawn and had no problem with disrupting her children’s sleep. However, the few other members of the clan that still lived at home were probably already awake since the boys had a few more days of school and her sister worked every waking moment of her life.

Holly had little patience for the noise that disturb her sleep. She twisted in the bed a few more times, before sitting up and rubbing the sleep from her eyes with the balls of her hands.

“Gar,” She mumbled, untangled her legs from the comforter. “I’m going to get some coffee. You want some?”

He didn’t respond, the only noise coming from the other side of the room being his quiet snore.

“I’ll take that as a no.” She spoke to herself.

Life in Colorado was so different from Arizona. She never woke up before noon in the desert, breakfast didn’t even exist and the need for coffee only came during hangovers. She had grown so fond of it, it even got the official title of home after she moved into an apartment with Garrett. Parties happened every night, not the type that were expected of a group of young adult, they were really just get-togethers, the goal being socialization and not alcohol.

The kitchen was chaos. It’s typical cleanliness replaced with bags of food and party-ware covering every flat surface. Holly’s younger brothers sat on stools beside the island, both look extra exhausted, scooping up spoonfuls of sweet cereal and eating them.

“Morning Jack. Tyler.” She greeted, watching the kitchen scene as if she had seen never seen it.

Jack brushed the dark hair from his eyes before nodding at her, a smile appearing. He was the youngest of the group and had just entered his teenage years. His greasy hair resembled Garrett, only instead of red it was black. The braces on his mouth and the few zits on his face prevented him from being the lady’s man at the school but with his father’s charm, Holly knew he probably didn’t struggle too much.

Tyler was a different story. He was the hockey player and track star. His smile and eyes brought him many girls, all of whom Holly had heard about in the family emails sent out from her mother. He looked so different from Jack, to the point where one could assume they had different parents. He was more like her mother, his temper was short and his goals were big.

Her attention went to her screaming mother who was cradling the cell phone between her head and shoulder, her hands frantically shoving sandwiches and cans of soda into the lunch bags. No curse words left the woman’s left but her tone get more and more stern, obviously she was talking to someone from her office.

“Oh good morning dear.” Her mother put a hand over the speaker, the face of annoyance being pushed away by her mother’s forced smile. “Hope you slept well.”

Holly forced a smile as she moved towards the coffee maker. “Eh. The altitude. I have to adjust back to it.”

“Yeah, it’s been a while since you’ve been up here.” Her mother chuckled, keeping her attention on the lunches.

Before Holly could respond, Georgia was already back on the phone screaming to Jean, the secretary about some missing files.

“How long’s she been on for?” Holly questioned, looking at her brothers again.

“20 minutes.” Jack mumbled. “Office crisis.”

“Ah.” Holly replied as she mixed the sugar into her drink.

The relationship with her brothers was strained. She left before she really could get to know Jack, he was still playing catch with Tyler and exploring the woods to care about his older sister. And Tyler, he was close with Holly so him leaving made him bitter. The fact that this was her first time back in over two years didn’t help much either. They were the biggest reason for this trip though, her brothers deserved her attention even though she couldn’t get along with her parents.

“So how’s school?” She asked them, leaning against the granite counter.

They both shrugged in sync, either too tired or didn’t care enough to tell her details. She couldn’t expect much more, it was a trait her father had passed along to all of them. The shoulder shrug was a common Thomas response.

Holly watched them sit there, the memories of this life feeling her again. “Well have a nice day guys. I’ve got some stuff to work on.” She pushed herself from the counter.

“Holly, honey.” Her mother’s voice rang through the kitchen, stopping her daughter mid-step. “Will you do me a huge favor and take the boys to school. One of my clients is having a crisis.”

“Mom!” Tyler’s voice filling in for Holly’s. “You promised you’d let me drive today!”

“Tyler. Shush.” She snapped at the boy, his head quickly dropping. “Holly, please? I wouldn’t ask you if I didn’t have to.”

At that moment she regretted coming downstairs. She wished she had just curled into Garrett’s bed, letting him comfort her back into sleep. He wouldn’t ask her to drive anywhere, he wouldn’t make her do anything she didn’t want to. “Mom—” She tried.

“Holly please. You’re father’s showing a house and Bekah’s already at work. I need you to do this for me.”

The silence in the kitchen wasn’t a good sign. Tyler’s eyes stayed on the cereal and Jack avoiding watching the two at all cost. Holly could have said no and walked up to the room, but this evening and the whole week would be miserable. Holly had plenty of other disappointing news to share with her parents, this was a battle not worth fighting.

“Fine.” Holly groaned, attempting to yet again leave the room. Just leave the keys on the table. I just got to change.”

“Oh, no. You’ll have to take your car.” Georgia added.

“You mean Garrett’s parents’ car?"

Her mother was getting annoyed and everyone in the kitchen could tell. The boys still avoided eye contact with either female in the room. Holly watched the red rising to her mother’s neck, the fragment of a smile disappearing. “Yes Holly, you drove all the way here in it, I’d imagine they wouldn’t mind you just taking it up the road.”

“Fine.” She uttered, leaving the room before any other requested could be made.

She went back to her room. Her mother made her furious, her teeth were gritted together. This was why Holly didn’t want to be here. She didn’t want to be around her poisonous mother. She lacked respect for her children, they all were treated like they were 12 throughout their adulthood, even her step brothers got that treatment.

Holly began digging through Garrett’s suitcase. She knew he had the keys last night but she didn’t know where she left them. She took her anger out on his clothes, which were neatly packed into the bag. She helped him put them there and now she was the only destroying it. Clothes were pulled out and thrown to the spot beside her knees.

Garrett tossed in his bed, the sheets tightening around his bare chest. “Holly?” He grumbled, his eyes yet open.

“Where the fuck are the keys Gar?” She questioned, her attention still in his bag.

He rolled again, pulling his hands from under the blanket and rubbing his eyes open. “What?”

“Garrett.” Her attention snapped to him. “Where are the fucking car keys?”

Garrett’s head was on the pillow, his eyes shutting again. The boy was tired. After the 12 hour car ride the day before and then the multiple holiday parties attended earlier that week, it was surprising he was even conscious at that moment.

“Gary!” She demanded, getting up from the spot she was kneeling at and going over to his bed. “Just answer my question.”

“What was the question?” His voice was quiet, a soft, tired smile appearing.

She felt like a jerk for being mean to him. It wasn’t his fault and he didn’t deserve this. She just wished she could climb into the bed with him and snuggle up to him, having his arms wrapped around him. “I just need to know where the keys are.” She softly spoke.

Garrett’s eyes opened, the blue flooding the room. “Why?”

“I have to take my little brothers to school.” She groaned, sitting on his bed. “Mom said she needed me too.”

Garrett’s smirk grew. “I’ll go with you.”

“No, Gar. I know you’re tired and you should catch up on sleep.”

“I’m fine.”

“No. You’re exhausted.” She argued.

“Please, Holly.” He sat up, the covers falling. “You and I both know I’m fine.”

She was reluctant, knowing it was his vacation too. He was taking this time away from his family and home to be here, to spend time with a group of people he barely knew and probably didn’t really want to stay with. “You really don’t have to.” She mumbled, her eyes leaving his.

“It’s fine, we’ll get breakfast after, make a date of it.” He replied, leaving no chance for her to say anything else as he crawled out of his bed, leaving the covers in a ball at the foot of the bed and grabbed a tank top, slipping it on. She watch him wander around the room, grabbing his wallet and phone.

“What about the keys Gar?” She reminded as he went for the door handle.

He smiled at her and chuckled. Garrett dug around in his stuff again, pulling out the pants he wore yesterday. The key ring attached to the belt loop. “Found ‘um.”

She couldn’t help but smile at him. He was charming and she knew it. Garrett was her biggest blessing for this trip, she knew if he hadn’t come, she’d b stuck here alone, dealing with her parents until the rest of the clan showed up. There really wasn’t an ounce of her that didn’t love Garrett. She could never not love Garrett.

“Ready?” He asked, pulling her from her thoughts.

She glanced at his eyes, the smile on his face lighting them up. “Yeah.”

Holly pulled a sweatshirt from her bag and slipped it on before slipping out the door with him and heading for the steps. She grabbed his hand and mumbled a thank you to the boy, resting her head against his shoulder as they walked through the upper story and down the stairs.

The Thomas house was awake, every light was on and every door open. Georgia Thomas’s chirping voice was heard before they even saw her. She was yelling at the boys, telling them to get their bags for school. It hadn’t changed at all since she left, even her mother’s apron was the same. Holly despised this life, the planned life, the early life.

Holly’s mother’s face lit up when she saw Garrett with her. “Oh Garrett, I didn’t want Holly to wake you up.”

Holly pulled away from Garrett as her mother’s eyes scanned the two’s linked hands, a disapproving look covering her face.

“Oh, no worries Mrs. Thomas. We’re going to go to breakfast anyways.” He forced a smile.
“Holly should take you to Ferdinand’s. Their omelets are so good. Right Holly?”

Holly wanted to leave. She wanted to walk out the door at that moment and drive back to her real home. Her new family’s festivities would be more fun than being here and dealing with her mother. Garrett’s mom would invite them over and they’d have dinner there and she’d listen to funny stories about Garrett growing up. Holly and Garrett wouldn’t get weird looks when they held hands or snuggled. Arizona was heaven compared to this.

“Yeah Mom.” Holly mumbled, focusing her attention on the wall behind her mother.
Had the boys not come in when they did, the silent tension would have grown until her mother spoke again, telling Holly to do something else and suggested more things that neither one had any intention of doing.

“Oh, Jack, Tyler.” The older woman spoke again, turning her attention to them. “You boys haven’t met Garrett yet.” She pushed them forward, adding extra awkwardness to the situation.

The introductions were made quickly, both parties mumbling brief hellos to the other. Both Jack and Tyler seemed extra miserable this morning, obviously knowing Christmas break was so close.

“We should go.” Holly stated, glancing at Garrett for moral support.

Her mother agreed, pushing the cluster of young adults out the door and into the cold Colorado air. It was 12 degrees, the snow from the previous snow now crunchy under their feet. This was different too. They two never dealt with this type of morning, even when they were on the road with the band.

“Just push the stuff of the floor guys.” Garrett began, watching the boys pull open the doors to the messy car. “We didn’t really get a chance to clean it up since the ride.”

Garrett climbed into the passenger’s seat, confessing to Holly that he was too tired to drive he had no idea where he was going. Holly smiled at him, happy to see him hand over the keys before climbing into the car.

She pulled out of the driveway and back onto the main road, her eyes staying on the road. Garrett dealt with the music, flipping through the CD cases before popping one of his mix tapes into the CD player. The music filled the cold air, the boys in the backseat not starting a conversation and the two up front were too busy poking each other to care about talking.
Mount Point hadn’t changed since she left. The town’s Main Street was repaved and the young trees had grown some but it was the same place. Holly’s old favorite spots in the town still stood, people entering and leaving them. She smiled seeing the familiar scenes and face.

Holly pulled the car into the school’s parking lot, quickly spotting a parking spot. They place was buzzing, mothers and teenagers leaving cars and walking into the building. It hadn’t changed much either. Mr. Randall still stood in front, the same grey pea coat covering him as he greet students and shook hands of parents.

The doors opened as soon as the car stopped moving, the boys flying out of the car and to their packs of friends waiting for them in front. “Chatty brothers you got there Holly.” Garrett teased, looking at her.

“Shut up.” She replied, hitting his shoulder with her hand and looking out the window.

It was bittersweet. This was her old life and she did love it then. She remembered the days of high school, back when she never wanted to leave Colorado and her friends here knew her better than anyone. The Thomas name was well known too. She and her siblings were athletic and smart, always pushed to succeed by their parents.

“You wanna get out and say hi or something?” Garrett asked, snapping her from her nostalgic trance.

She groaned. “Oh dear God no.” Turning her attention back on the car.

The town was more awake than the two in the car were. Every restaurants’ doors were unlocked. All the towns people entering and leaving. It was like a utopia for Garrett and Holly, both observing this little world that seemed so different.

She hummed with the music coming from the car’s stereo system, both hands patting gently along with the music. Garrett couldn’t help but laugh at her, finding the little number adorable.

“Where do you wanna eat?” She asked at the stop light.

“Let’s just go to the place your mom suggested.”

She navigated to the small cafe, singing along with the music the entire way to amuse him.

They went to Ferdinand’s, neither one ordering the omelet like her mother suggested. They both got coffee and a bagel, following in the Mount Point tradition. A lot of the diners recognized her, shrieking in the small cafe in excitement. Holly would smile awkwardly and greet them and talk about how they were, trying to bypassing the questions about school and Arizona.

Garrett sipped the coffee, watching Holly speak to the fifth person to come say hello. She was trying to explain why she left for Arizona to a woman who obviously hadn’t left this little town since her own birth. Garrett watched her fumbled over her words, the woman trying to understand.

“And who’s this handsome young man?” The woman smiled at him, turning her head to see him.

“This is Garrett. He came up with me.”

Garrett smiled at the woman, watch her fingers grasp the end of the table in order to stay balanced. “And you two are dating?” She assumed.

It was the broken record line of the morning. Everyone who came over asked it the minute they saw Garrett. They assumed he tagged along for some reason and it just had to be that they were dating.

“No.” Holly spoke, watching the pick come to Garrett’s cheeks again. “Garrett’s my best friend.”

“Oh.” The woman smile at him again, giving him a wink. “You two’d be awful cute together.”
“Thanks Mrs. Peterson.” Holly’s face now turning red.

The woman watched them eye each other awkwardly. “Well, I’ll let you get back to your breakfast. It was very nice to meet you Garrett.”

The elderly woman walked back to her table, the group watching as she grasped corners of tables and chairs while navigating.

“Who was that?” Garrett asked as soon as the woman was far enough away for them to speak without eavesdropping.

She sighed, picking at her bagel. “My dentist’s wife.”

“Your dentist’s wife?” Garrett repeated. “Really?”

Holly nodded. “And the neighborhood’s gossiper.”

Garrett’s smirk grew. “Good thing I didn’t tell her about Kenny then huh?”

“What about Kennedy?”

“I should go tell her about how you wanna bone Kennedy.”

Holly’s mouth dropped a little, the pink coming back to her cheeks. “But I don’t want to bone Kennedy.”

“Yesterday you said he was hot.” Garrett reminded. “And I know what that means.”

“Yeah.” She fumbled with her words. “But that- uh… that doesn’t mean I want to bone him.”
“Sure.” Garrett still teased.

The two finished their breakfast, Garrett spending the time teasing her over the comments from the car ride yesterday.

‘You know,” Holly whispered into his ear as the two walked out of the restaurant, her hand in his the moment Mrs. Peterson couldn’t see them. “If I remember correctly, you were the one jealous about Kennedy in the car.”

Garrett smiled at her. “I would never be jealous of a guy like Kennedy Brock.”

They spotted the car and walked towards it, Holly handing the keys to Garrett for him to drive back to the house. “Oh really, and why’s that?”

“Because it’s Kennedy. He’s weird and gross and just not a normal person.”

“Oh.” She said, untangle herself from Garrett in preparation to walk to the passenger’s door. “And you are just to epitome of normal?”

Garrett chuckled at her. “Closer to normal than Kennedy.”

She laughed at him, amused by his confidence. This was normal chatter for the two, they picked on each other and the band, knowing that offense wouldn’t be taken. It was comforting for her, knowing Garrett would never really be hurt by this joking around and she loved when he did it to her. It brought a unique charm to the friendship and kept them both humble in the presence of others.

The house was empty when they got home, her mother’s car gone from the drive way. Holly look forward to this, some silence and solitude with Garrett. It brought them back to those first few months, before touring and the guys and his family. It was just them, no Kennedy or Garrett’s mom were around to change plans.

“Finally.” She spoke when the walked inside. “Some quiet.”

The heat was down, the lights were off. It was perfection. This was what she missed about Colorado. You could stay in complete silence. No neighbors were around to scream through walls. No cell phones to disturb her sleep. It was cold and quiet, exactly how she remembered it.

Garrett smiled at her, wrapping an arm around her shoulder. “You miss it, don’t you?”

She curled up into him, wrapping her arms around his waist. “I miss this.”

He followed suite, wrapping both his arms around her like she did to him. He held her close, allowing her to escape against him and dream of the perfect world where she could have the band and have everything she loved there right here in this cabin in woods. Then she could have every little thing she wanted without the 12 hour trip and without the miserable parents.

“But Gar.” She mumbled, loosening her grip on him. “I’d rather have you than that.”

A smile grew over Garrett’s face, not his devilish smirk or common grin. No, the edges of his mouth grew into a genuine, heartfelt smile. She hit his heart there, making him feel warm inside, making him feel like the biggest pansy ever. He didn’t care though, he’d take it over anything else, he loved this girl so much. She changed him for the better.

“So now what do we do?” He asked, loosening his grip and resting his chin on the top of her head.

“Now.” She spoke against him. “We take a nap.”

She released her hold on him and walked over to the couch. “Come on Gar. I’m not napping by myself!”

That same smile, that goddamn smile came back, covering his face. She could make him feel love in such subtle ways. Holly was capable of anything in his eyes. She was the perfect girl. One who would listen to Ryan Adams in the car with him, the girl who would sit with him in the van when he grew frustrated with touring, she was the one who demanded his company for a nap and yet, knew how to make him feel so amazing. She was utter perfection.

He laid down beside her, allowing her to use his chest as a pillow. His arms snaked around her waist, his fingers resting at the base of her spine. She was smiling against him and he was smiling holding her. Blankets weren’t needed, the two were radiating enough heat to keep them cozy and happy in that big cabin.