Exhale

They left as quickly as they could, pushing past her mother and her continuing questions about their plans. Holly answered them as vaguely as possible, leaving out the fact that the two were off to go find some booze. She really had no reason to tell her mother that, especially knowing her parents views on underage drinking. They were oblivious to truth too, neither one even wanting to realize that each one of their children participated in the activity.

Georgia even tried to pry some answers out of Garrett, who she assumed to be a softie for motherly charm. Garrett just replied with the same vague answers, promising her that the two weren’t going to get in any trouble like the mother assumed. It was different than what he was used to with his own mother. She rarely pried into his personal business like this and was very aware of his habits.

They made it out the door quicker than Holly thought they would. Her mother hadn’t made it easy when she stood in from of the doorway, demanding to hear the final plans. But they squeeze through and walked to the car hand-in-hand.

It was their second run into town and she encouraged Garrett to drive, wanting him to learn how to get there without her help. He figured she just wasn’t the the mood to drive, like normal.

“Would you quit doing that?” Garrett demanded, pulling Holly’s fingers from her mouth preventing any further wear on her cuticles. “You’re going to make yourself bleed.”

It was a habit she developed out of boredom. After the hours she spent in the van with the guys, it was just something she started doing. And it was something Garrett hated, knowing that she would do it until she brought blood up and then complain to him about it hurting. “You can’t tell me what to do.” She mocked, pulling her arm away from him and resting it on the arm rest.

He was silent, ignoring her teasing. Garrett felt guilty because he was loving this trip so much. She felt so bad earlier and he felt bad for her. Yet he was still loving every moment. He was happy she was so absorbed in his presence and they could spend time together without having extra guests included.

“How are we going to get booze anyways Holly?” Garrett questioned, realizing that not having John Jared, or Max around now made the two 20 years olds’ chances of getting drinks slim.

“I have my ways Gar.” She spoke, distracted by the scenery.

Garrett glanced at her, confused. “How?”

“An old friend of mine always knows all the parties.” She answered, mumbling some.

It seemed like each time they took the drive back into town she would open up more about it. Holly would tell Garrett a personal tale about a particular building or store. She seemed to finally be opening up about the place, sharing with him her thoughts on the community she spent so long with. It had always been a bit of mystery to the guys, Holly rarely told stories of her childhood or teenage years. If someone asked she would answer vaguely, shrugging, and changing the subject.

“So this kid we’re going to see?” Garrett pressed her some, “Who is he?”

Holly smiled, amused by his interest in her friend, assuming it was just simply Garrett’s curiousity. “His name’s Todd. We went to high school together.”

“And you were just friends?”

“We dated some; on and off.” She shrugged, some red rising to her cheeks. “He was always sort of a douche bag.” It was the first time Garrett heard her mention any boyfriends of her past. She told him she dated then, making it clear that none of them were a reason to go back. He never heard a name or saw a face. She wouldn’t even tell him how many there were, explaining to him multiple times that they weren’t important. Jealousy still circulated in him, his fingers tightening around the vinyl of the steering and his jaw tightening briefly. “He’s a creep Gar.”

Garrett was silent after that, allowing thoughts of her cuddling with other guys and kissing them to distort his own clarity. The guys assumed she didn’t want to talk about it because it was a lack of experience but maybe it was the opposite. Garrett knew she’d never tell him, no matter which way it went.

She rambled out a few more directions, taking Garrett into a quieter section of the small town. House lights were just starting to come on as dusk started to settle. Headlights were flicked on, providing the streets with just enough light to keep the dogs barking. It was complete suburbia, just like Tempe, except snow covered the ground instead of grass and shrubbery.

“Left.” She declared, directed him into the parking lot of a small bar. The lot was empty. The small sign glowing over the doorway had a few bulbs burnt out, the name becoming harder to read and understand.

“This is where we are meeting him?” He mocked, “Wow, I bet this kid’s got quite a future ahead of him.”

She rolled her eyes, “He’s a bartender Gar.”

“Obliviously not a good one.” He tried again, attempting to cover the jealousy with sarcasm.
It wasn’t the same jealousy he felt with Kennedy. That kind was easy and he knew how to manage it. This though, meeting Holly’s ex, someone that could have slept with her and comforted her, was very different. At least, with Kennedy he knew the truth. His friend would never touch Holly. Not like this guy could have.

Holly glanced over at him, oblivious to the fact that he was allowing these thoughts to cycle through him. “Ready?”

He chewed on the inside of his lip gently, trying to calm himself some so he wouldn’t go into the bar and kill the guy on the spot. Mustering up a rough grin, he nodded, pulling the door handle.

The bar was empty except for the dark-haired man behind the counter, wiping the wooden top aimlessly with a rag while staring at the game scores flashing over the television. It looked exactly how a bar was suppose to look, Coors Light signs and Rolling Rock posters covered the dark walls. The jukebox in the corner emitted a soft tune, one that Garrett probably could have named if he wasn’t so distracted by his thoughts.

What brought him back was the feeling of her hand reaching for his, snapping him back to the moment. He definitely wasn’t expecting it, not at this moment. He assumed Holly was going to run into the other guy’s arms, hugging him and telling him how much she missed him. She tightened her grip around his fingers, pulling him further into the bar.

“Holly Thomas!” The voice echoed around the empty space.

The man behind the bar laughed, looking at the two. Garrett tried to not react, knowing the actions were probably unnecessary. He didn’t want to be perceived as a big, jealous, raging maniac. But he couldn’t help it, knowing what could have happened clouded his thoughts and judgement.

“Todd,” She replied weakly, leaning into Garrett’s side more. “How are you?”

He left his station behind the bar, pushing through the small, hinged door separating the beverages from the customers. His black dress shoes squeaked against the floor. Todd looked much older than most people Garrett and Holly hung out with, the white shirt and tie were straight and ironed. His sad attempt at a goatee looked more like a caterpillar than actual facial hair. A smirk grew over him when he eyed their hands laced together.

“I’m good.” She spoke back quietly. “And you?”

“I’m doing great.” Todd winked, stepping closer again. “You’ve really grown up.” The green eyes traced Holly’s outline, pausing at her hips and the smirk growing over Todd’s lips. “You look good.”

Garrett gritted his teeth tighter together, staring at him. The list of things Garrett wanted to do to him was growing. Killing would even do him justice anymore; he wanted to cause physical pain to. Had Holly had not come and been holding his hand at that moment he would probably been pulling a Kenny and beating the guy with his fists.

“Todd, this is m-my boyfriend Garrett.”

Garrett tried to hide his surprise by staring harder at the guy, making his best attempt to act natural. The heat rose to the back of his neck and the butterflies that were dead long ago seemed to be reincarnated. Todd eyed them both, as if he knew she just made that up and he was in shock over it. She let go off his hand, wrapping the arm around his waist and encouraging his arm onto her shoulder.

Todd’s grin grew as he watched them, “Garrett?” He acknowledged, nodding, “Hope you’re having a nice time in Mount Point.”

She tightened the arm around his waist, pulling him closer to her. It was awkward, the way Todd would look at him skeptically and then her. The face Todd made, the way his eyes glanced over her features, and the small smirk he had made Garrett angry.

“We’re looking for a party Todd.” She spoke, breaking the tension that was there. “Preferably one with booze.”

“Oh.” Todd smiled, looking away. “Well let me go check my calendar.”

He walked back through the little door and disappeared behind counter. Garrett rested his head against hers, allowing her smell to calm him down. He knew he had a jealousy problem and the guys would frequently remind him of it. The way he was when she and Kennedy were together made that obvious. With this guy though, it was the worst. He never wanted to hit Kennedy, he just wanted to tell him to fuck off and go find someone else to flirt with. This guy made him feel like his mouth was useless and his fists was the best method.

“Sorry.” She whispered, “I didn’t mean to put you in that position, I just didn’t want him to start his creepy flirty thing. It was just easier saying that.”

He smiled, pressing his lips to the top of her head. “It’s fine Holly, no big deal—”

“There’s one at the barn.” Todd interrupted, appearing from the back room with a small leather book in his hands, flipping a page. “And some house one but it doesn’t seem like it’s going to be big. I’d go to the barn if you want a good time.”

“A barn?” Garrett repeated, looking at him. “Why would you have a party in a barn?”

Todd looked back at him, “It’s not actually a barn, it’s just a big abandoned building on an old farm.”

“It’s sort of the popular place to have parties around here. The cops don’t really bother anyone out there.” Holly added, glancing up at him. “Has been since I was in school.”

“It’s where I met Holly.” Todd reminded her, watching Garrett’s expression more than hers. He was taunting him obviously, waving this piece of Holly that Garrett didn’t have in front of his hand. “That was quite a night.” He recalled, watching Garrett’s jaw tighten with a smirk.
“Wasn’t it babe?”

Holly chuckled awkwardly, eyeing Todd’s grin and realizing what he was trying to do. “Well we should probably go Gar.” She interrupted the glaring match, tapping his hip gently. “Get some food before the party.”

He forget she was there for a moment, his thoughts clouded everything else. All the secrets of her past, the ones he assumed to be no big deal suddenly became a big deal. The idea of her without him and with this guys made him angry. The guy was a sleaze and it was obvious.

“Gar.” She tapped his side again. “Dinner?”

He barely had a chance to process her words before Todd starting speaking, listing all her favorite restaurants and the reasons. Telling Garrett about those first awkward encounter and that first kiss outside the small cafe on Roosevelt Street that was closed now.

Now Holly really felt the tension; it was leaking from Garrett. His fingers and palm, draped casually across her shoulder, began moving together, gently grazing the fabric of her sweatshirt. A tight fist replaced the warm, comforting palm.

“Gary.” She whispered, quieter this time. “Stop.” Her free hand made an attempt at prying his fingers apart and replace them with hers. He didn’t budge, his eyes still focused on Todd. She never saw him stare at something so hard and with such intensity, as if he was determined to make it internally combustion with just a look.

“Man, do you remember that time when we went down to the creek Holly?” Todd recalled again, now getting a glare from her too. It wasn’t as hard or as focused because she was attempting to wake Garrett from the trance and Todd wasn’t helping.

“Garrett.” Holly voiced rose, ignoring the other voice in the room.

He shook her words off, not even bothering to glance at her. He was seeing red and he knew who the enemy. Holly’s past obviously wasn’t what he expected and this made that apparent. Todd was the gateway to that, making the memories attack her and the facts to haunt him. Garrett knew he couldn’t change them but he could make them shut up.

Holly didn’t react until she saw that look in Garrett’s eye. It matched that look you see when a pack of wolves before a hunt or a cluster of cowboys before bull roping. His eyes grew sharp, the blue piercing through like she never saw. The fist on her shoulder was even tighter than before, the fingernails leaving deep impressions in his palm.

It was like a chain reaction, the tension in his fist tightened the muscles in his forearm and into his bicep. She rustled under him, simply readjusting her posture, but as she did he tightened his arm again. The gesture wasn’t gentle or kind and it was so far from who he was with her.

When she went to take a step away from her, Garrett did the same thing again, only now causing her to push away from under him. She furrowed her brow, his action delivering a message that he wasn’t speaking. Holly knew that Garrett was protective with her, every time she was with Kennedy he made that apparent. His jaw would tighten and he’d stare at her. But what he was doing here made her see a whole new part of him. She knew he was about to do something that he couldn’t control and would regret.

The arm that was laced across her shoulder was now stiff and tight around her, his forearm over her bicep, elbow folded at her shoulder. Holly attempted to push out of his grasp again so she could get him to reconsider the actions he was probably planning out. It took a few gentle pulls away before she learned his strength. She used her shoulder and in one big motion, slipped away from him.

She reached for his chin, her thumb pressing against the red stubble. “Garrett.” She spoke sternly, sounding more like a mother than a friend. “Stop it.” His lack of eye contact proved that, yet again he was ignoring her. She pulled down then, her other hand wrapping around the base of his neck so his eyes were directed at hers. He focused on her, the blueness of his eyes startling her.

Of course, she found his grand gesture flattering. Never had anyone protected her like this. Her parents were protective, but not in this way. Garrett was willing to put his safety on the line for her. She knew that of she didn’t stop him and Todd continued to talk, Garrett would hurt him. And as much as she would enjoy watching Todd get hit, she knew the guys wouldn’t be happy if she brought back the bassist bloodied up.

At the moment she assumed she had his attention, Todd spoke again. Even though she held his head in a position where he could only see her, his eyes went up. Holly took one more step closer so the front of her body touched his. This proximity startled him, causing him to voluntarily look at her this time.

“Listen to me,” Her tone was stern, his eyes directed back down at her then.

“Yeah Garrett,” Todd interrupted, causing his attention to shift again. “You really should listen to her. She always knew what she was doing.” He winked before his own eyes scanned down Holly.

Holly was so close now that she could see the muscles over the jaw bone tighten when his teeth gritted. “Gar.” She whispered low, into the boy’s ear. The hand that was resting around the base of his neck moved slowly, her fingers and palm touching the bit of the skin exposed by the open button of his shirt. “Now you listen,” Her voice dropped when she hit the first closed button of his shirt and popped the snap open. Her fingers stayed inside the seam and her palm stayed outside. “Why don’t we go and—” The next button was opened, “and have ‘quite a night’ for ourselves huh?”

The tension over him disappeared then, a ring of goosebumps surrounded each of her fingers touching the skin. Garrett worked hard to not sigh or breathe heavily in that moment. The sensation of her touching him like this made his heart convulse a few times. “Yeah.” He breathed, watching her.

Garrett had trouble focusing, her hand caused every operating organ in his body to overheat or stop. She was touching him in a way he’d never been touched. Her soft fingers touched him in a way he’d dreamed of. His mind was stuck on it, as if it were some deep piece of poetry or complicated math problem.

When her fingers rested above the third button he finally took his eyes off her, his gaze traveled to the bitchboy who had been taunting him. The look that covered him before, that nasty little smirk, fell from his lips with more force than his fist could. Garrett felt victorious, his well-known smile was back. “Alright babe.” He muttered, suppressing the slight whine threatening its way up his throat, “Let’s save it for the party.” He pulled her hand from its position reluctantly and quickly pinched the small clasps together. “We don’t want Todd to feel uncomfortable.”

They turned together, leaving Todd and his ego on the other side of the room. Garrett smiled victoriously, rewrapping his arm around Holly again as they walked towards the exit. His arm was loose now and rested comfortably around her. He wasn’t claiming her now, it was simply kindness that inspired him to do it.

“We’re really like that now Holly?” Todd’s voice echoed around the empty space behind them. She stopped first and he followed her action reluctantly, “I give you information and can’t even get a goodbye hug in return? How is that fair?”

The tension was back in Garrett’s arm, moving its way through his body. Todd took the silence as an okay, and proceeded to approach her. Every squeak his shoes made caused Garrett to tighten his arm around her.

Garrett groaned, turning when she did to see Todd who was now only a few inches away from her. “Come on man—” He attempted, proceeding to put his other arm in front of her and keep him from touching her.

“Gar, it’s fine.” She mumbled, glancing up at him apprehensively.

He was back to fighting his own jealousy. Todd continued to smirk at him, making Garrett rage again. As much as Garrett wanted to believe Todd was just playing around with and he was just simply the douche bag Holly said he was, he couldn’t help but believe what he was implying. Holly could have run away from Colorado for completely different reasons and that’s why her parents were mad at her. Todd could have been something more than a crummy, old boyfriend to her.

Todd snaked his arms around Holly’s waist, pulling her into his chest. That same grin still across his face. Garrett watched her mostly. It was obvious she was uncomfortable and that made Garrett more alright with the entire thing. He knew how she hugged, he’d felt it himself and observed it with the guys. She would be like a bear, squeezing tightly around a stomach and pressing her head into their neck or chest. Todd’s hug wasn’t like that, she barely touched him.

Holly let go first, assuming Todd would slither away and back to his station behind the bar. He didn’t, continuing to tightening his hold on her and bring her head closer to hers. Holly eyed Garrett, making sure he wasn’t about to rip Todd’s voice box out of his throat. The look on his face made her wish she didn’t hug him, Garrett’s frown lacked the angry, it just simply looked like heartbreak.

She should have expected it. Holly knew Todd and the way he demanded all attention be on him. That’s how he was all high school, any moment where he wasn’t on everyone’s mind, he’d act out so he would be on everyone’s mind. Todd pressed his lips to corner of hers. He kissed her gently, nothing like in the past when he had no competition. She didn’t really realize what happened until Garrett’s hand wound around her arm.

Garrett reacted quickly, pulling her from his touch. “Don’t touch my girlfriend!” He extended his other arm in front of her, blocking any attempts at advancing on her again. The muscles over his jaw became visible again, his attention on Todd.

“You know Gar?” Todd played with the words, allowing the last letter to roll. “Jealousy is a sign of insecurity.”

“What do I have to be insecure about? Clearly I’m with her and you’re not.” He snapped back, doing exactly what Holly hoped he wouldn’t.

She pushed passed the barrier he created around her. Her face was falling as his rose, his own victorious smile showing he didn’t regret it. She was disappointed in him, for engaging in Todd’s game. It wasn’t like Garrett to boost or act pompous and right now, he was sinking down to Todd’s level, making Holly feel like his parent. She reached for the collar of his shirt, balling it up in the palm of her hand. “We’re going.” She sneered at him yanking him in the direction of the door.

Before they could slip out, Todd’s voice flipped them on last time. “No repeats of our night Holly.” He screamed as she made it to the door, Garrett’s shirt still balled in her hand. “He definitely couldn’t handle that.”

Garrett stopped mid-step, attempting to turn around and look at Todd again. He wanted to reply with something, another try at making him shut up. What he said hit Garrett finally though, making him unable to speak. Todd mentioned the night again, implying more and more, making Garrett’s imagination run wild and his vision of Holly to become distorted. No one she spent time with now would know what she was talking about, only the people here would.

Holly continued to tug at his shirt, leading him out into the cold.