Status: Back in business. Please read second authors note added to the 'Info" section of this story.

Head on Collision

Walls

Jack’s POV

I searched almost frantically for the song I wrote. I know I wrote it in the back of one of my school books. I dumped the contents of my school bag onto my bed and started scanning every single book; English, history, Spanish and math. I frowned. Where the fuck did I put it? I swept all of my school books onto my floor and sighed to myself.

The loud ringing and vibrating of my cell on my bedside table made me jump. I moved to it; thinking about who it could possibly be; it wasn’t like anyone besides Zack and Rian were talking to me anyway. I picked up the phone and looked at the screen. Alex’s smiling face grinned at me from behind his name. My heart did a back flip. He hadn’t talked to me in over two weeks. What was this? What was going on? I nervously hovered my thumb over the answer button before pressing down; bringing the phone to my ear.

“Um. Hello?” my voice wavered as I spoke into the phone. “Alex?”

“Hi Jack,” his voice responded.

My heart flew to my throat. It really was him. He was talking to me; calling me. I tried to maintain composure. I started pacing back and forth. If I didn’t move I would have started jumping up and down like a lunatic.

“It’s so good to hear from you,” I told him honestly. “I thought you were never going to speak to me again.”

“I,” I heard him swallow. “That was the idea.”

“Oh,” I frowned.

“That was until I found this song in my chemistry text book,” I heard the gentle rustle of paper.

I stopped dead in my tracks and dropped myself onto my bed. The song? My song? The one I wrote during suspension. I swallowed dryly; nerves crashing down on me.

“Wh-what song?” I murmured.

“Its called “Walls,” Alex explained. Fuck. It was my song. “It was tucked into the front cover of my text book.”

“Oh?” I said. How’d it get in there?

“Do you have any idea how it got there?” Alex asked; his voice suspicious.

He probably figured this was some lame attempt to get him back.

“No. No,” I shook my head before stopping; realizing that Alex couldn’t actually see me doing that. “I swear. I have no idea.”

“Well, someone put it there,” Alex finished.

I imagined him frowning to himself. The conversation died and an awkward silence consumed us. I had to know; I needed to know what Alex thought of the song. I waited a moment and listened for his breathing to make sure he was still there.

“So um, Lex?” I started.

It had been so long since I had called him that and he had actually let me get away with it.

“Yeah Jack?” he responded; thankfully.

“What’d you think of the song?” I asked carefully.

“It...” I heard Alex sigh. “Can you come over to my house now? I think we should talk about everything, including this song.”

“Um, yeah, absolutely,” I jumped up form my bed; running over to my wardrobe and stuffing my feet into my still laced up converses. “I’ll be there really soon okay?”

“Alright,” Alex answered and the line went dead.

I slid my phone into my pocket and picked up the small black box I kept on my bedside table. It was special. Something I had planned on giving Alex on Valentines Day. I just never had the chance. I quickly grabbed my thickest hoodie off its coat hanger. I pulled it on and effortlessly climbed out my back window. Within three minutes I found myself standing outside Alex’s house, out of breath and staring up at his window. Biting down on my lip, I approached the tree beside his house. I hauled myself up into it; negotiating each move carefully so I wasn’t sent crashing back down to the ground. I tapped on the window with a single knuckle. I heard footsteps and the doors were opened slowly.

I fought the urge to launch myself at him and hug him tightly. He wore my Blink t shirt again. I smiled slightly at his torso before meeting his eyes. He tugged at the t shirt unsurely and broke the eye contact. I touched the hand that was tugging on the shirt to stop him. He bit the side of his bottom lip and slowly brought his eyes back to mine.

“It looks better on you anyway,” I told him softly.

Alex seized one of my wrists and pulled me into him; squeezing me into a tight hug. I wrapped my arms around his waist and held onto him like my life depended on it. I savored everything about this hug; how he smelled, the strength of his hug, the warmth of his body; everything. I felt him loosen his grasp and I followed suit. He stepped back and I stepped into his room. He shut the door behind me.

“I’m sorry,” he told me; his voice quiet. “I just...”

“Had to?” I offered and he nodded.

“So, um,” he started.

“Yeah,” he dropped his eyes to the carpet . “Um.”

The silence consumed us; completely. I looked around the room slowly. it felt like ages since I had been in here; making love in the bed, sitting on the floor inside a jumbo Christmas package, snuggling to keep out the winter chills. And here I was again. But how long? That was the question.

“Do you want to sit down?” he asked suddenly and I smiled.

“Okay.”

He led the way to the side of his bed and sat down; picking up the piece of paper beside him to make a spot for me. I sat down beside him; close but not too close.

“so, Jasey told me what happened,” Alex started.

“Oh, really?”

“Yeah,” I looked down.

“I’m sorry I didn’t believe you to begin with Jack,” he turned to face me; tucking one leg up under himself.

“It’s okay,” I told him. “I mean, I’ve cried more than I ever had in my life since this happened, and I haven’t eaten but its cool.”

I saw the concern instantly flash over Alex’s face and I had to smile.

“I’m kidding you idiot,” I smiled again.

“Oh,” he sighed. “And I’m sorry I smacked you the way I did,” he careful inspected my jaw with his finger tips. “Did it hurt?”

“Yeah,” I shrugged. “But don’t be sorry. I deserved it.”

“Yeah, I guess.”

“Oh.”

The silence consumed us again and I I looked at the paper that Alex held in his hands. My atrocious handwriting scrawled down the page. Dear Alex at the top and Love Jack at the bottom. In the middle; a string of words that exposes those feelings; what he makes me feel.

“Lex?” I said quietly.

“Yeah?” Alex looked up to me.

“You don’t really hate me do you?” I asked; honestly afraid of the response.

“No Jack,” he shook his head slowly. “I could never hate you. I was just upset when I said that.”

“Oh, good.”

“I missed you Jack,” Alex whispered.

“I missed you too,” I replied.

“Can you sing it for me?”

“You know I cant sing Lex,” I answered.

“The I’ll sing, you give me the beat.”

“I don’t have one,” I told him. “I just, wrote down what I was feeling. I didn’t expect it to come out liek that.

“Then, speak them to me,” he requested.

“Lex...”

“Please,” he held out the paper to me and I took it carefully.

“Okay,” I swallowed. “It’s called Walls.”

Alex leaned back against the wall and crossed his legs. I cleared my throat and started.

Hey there it's good to see you again
It never felt right calling this just friends
I'm happy if your happy with yourself”


I smiled to myself; poking each item of clothing as the song requested them.

”Take off your shirt your shoes
Those skinny jeans I bought for you
It’s happening, there's nothing left to lose”


“I like that part,” Alex giggled.

I laughed before continuing.

”I'm gonna break down these walls,
I built around myself
I wanna fall so in love
With you.”


I pointed to Alex and he smiled fondly.

”And no one else
Could ever mean half as much
to me as you do now
Together we'll move on
just don't turn around
Let the walls break down”

I used to wear you like a ball and chain
I'd run and hide at the call of my name
It was obvious you were too much for me
oblivious
I was young and horny”


I shrugged and winked.

“In retrospect I would do it again
Stop talking shit to every one of your friends
I'm not the same boy you knew back then

Cause I could break down these walls
I built around myself
I wanna fall so in love
With you and no one else
Could ever mean half as much to me as you do now
Together we'll move on
just don't turn around
Let the walls break”


I tarted to nod my head as a possible beat filled my head.

”I can't breathe
My body's shaking
You've got a way with the way you take me
Cause you break me down
You know you break me down”


I slid closer to Alex; putting the paper down beside me.

”I'm gonna break down these walls
I built around myself
I wanna fall so in love
With you and no one else
Could ever mean half as much to me as you do now
Together we'll move on
just don't turn around
Let the walls break down

Let the walls break down
Cause you break me down”


“Let the walls break down,” Alex whispered.

I smiled at Alex a little.

“Fuck,” he swore. “I love that so much.”

“Thank you.”

“It’s funny though,” Ales continued. “You can write something amazing like that. but did you ever write that poem for English?”

“I did actually,” I told him proudly.

“Really?”

“Yeah,” I nodded. “It’s prefect. I think.”

“Does it answer Therapy though?” he looked concerned.

“Yes Lex,” I shook my head; smiling, “It does.”

“Oh good.”

It went quiet again.

“Hey Jack?”

“Yes Lex?”

“Can we call this a clean slate?”

“What?” I stared at him.

“A clean slate? Can we forget all the bullshit?” he asked “Put Jasey and all that shit behind us.”

“Fuck,” tears sprung to my eyes. “Yes. Fuck yes. Of course we can.”

I threw myself at him.

“You know, Wall is a lie,” I smiled again.

“What do you mean?” he pulled away and looked worried.

“It says that I want to fall in love with you,” I smiled a little. “But I already have.”

Alex looked at me. His face void of all emotion. I broke eye contact; looking down at my hands. I shouldn’t have said that.

“I want this to be official Jack,” he spoke.

“What?” I looked up.

“If what you say is true, about being in love with me,” he stopped and smiled; a blush burning on his face. “I want this, what we are to actually be official. I want to call you my boyfriend Jack. I mean, I know we were practically like boyfriends before but we never officiall.....”

I leaned forward; pressing my lips to his. This time I found no tension, no regret, no reluctance. He kissed me back instantly; sliding his hands up around my neck. I pulled back ever so slowly.

“Be my boy friend, Jack?” he asked.

“I thought you’d never ask,” I smiled. We stared into each others eyes like nothing had changed. I saw that love burning there; brighter then ever before. “Oh! I got you something.”

“You did!”

“Well, yeah. it was supposed to be for Valentines but because i fucked that up, I thought id give it to you tonight,” I explained.

“But how’d you know all this was going to happen?”

“I didn’t,” I replied. “But I had hoped.

I reached into my pocked and pulled out the little black box. I presented it to him. He took it carefully and popped the lid. There nestled amongst tissue paper sat two things. The first was a little sledge hammer; as big as the key on his necklace. I reached in and picked it up; holding it up at eye level.

“To come at those walls with,” I whispered and Alex smiled; the tears in his eyes making there way down his face.

I reached in and picked up the other.

“And this, is a promise ring,” I told him. I held up my right hand. “I’ve worn mine since this shit happened. I had bought them only a few days before.”

“You were going to give me this on valentines?” he looked at me; his eyes bright.

“The sledgehammer yes, the ring no,” I admitted. “I bought these before my driving test. I was going to give it to you then but you seemed so down. I wish I had.”

“No no, don’t be silly,” he shook his head quickly. “This is amazing Jack. I mean. Are you sure? Are you sure you want to make such a promise?”

“Ive never been more sure,” I told him. “I’m in love with you remember?”

Alex took his ring from me and slid it onto the same finger as I had mine.

“And, me?” he smiled; wiping his eyes with the back of his hand. “I’m in love with you.”
♠ ♠ ♠
2263 words.
i had never expected this to be so long.
But there we go.
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