Status: Back in business. Please read second authors note added to the 'Info" section of this story.

Head on Collision

You Had Me At Hello

Jack’s POV

Having my license sucks when I don’t have an actual car to drive. And having a boyfriend that insists that we can walk home when Rian offers us a lift sucks even more and you know what worse? When said boyfriend won’t even talk to you on this walk home. With an empty feeling in the pit of my stomach and a headache so severe I contemplated lopping my head off, Alex and I bid farewell to Zack and Rian. Zack had hugged me tightly; whispering a good luck into my ear. It left Rian looking so confused it was actually amusing.

I walked in time with Alex; side by side, step by step. There was a fairly big gap between us that still seemed out of place to me. My hands were stuffed into my pockets and his were in his. The sky above was more threatening than it was earlier. The clouds were almost entirely black. Shit. I stole a glance at Alex; his fringe was hanging in his face and he didn’t make a move to move it. I sighed.

“Lex, we need to talk,” I told him.

I felt Alex’s worried eyes on me and I instantly return the look.

“No no,” I shook my head. “It’s not one of those talks. Don’t worry.”

“Okay,” he exhaled.

I chewed on my lip thinking of a way to bring it up; to launch into a conversation like this. One of those deep and meaningful that might end in tears and a hug so long we’ll probably drown in the oncoming rain. I inhaled deeply before speaking.

“Lex. What’s wrong?”

“What do you mean?” he shrugged. “Nothing’s wrong.”

“You won’t let me near you,” I said; my voice strong.

“That’s bull....”

“No it’s not,” I said grabbing his arm and stopping him.

“Don’t,” He pulled his arm away from me.

“Don’t what?”

I leaned in; trying to slide my hand onto his cheek. He dodged my touch; pulling his face away. Thunder cracked above our heads as I reached for his hand, only to have him pull it clear.

“See!” I yelled over the thunder rolls. “You won’t let me fucking touch you.”

Alex turns and starts to walk away.

“I’m sorry,” he throws over his shoulder.

“Don’t apologise,” I sighed. “Just tell me why.”

“I don’t know,” Alex yelled.

I watched as he slowly walked away from me. The rain started to spit down on us; Alex’s plaid shirt soaking up each individual droplet. The rain gradually got heavier as I watched him walk. His pace slowed a little.

“Lex stop,” I called out to him and he did; stopping and turning back to face me. I walked quickly back to him; the rain soaking me through almost instantly.

I approached him. His beanie sat saturated on his head; his fringe stuck to his face. The tears were evident in his eyes despite the rain.

“Alex,” I started. “Please. Please just let me touch you.”

I took a step forward and he took a step back.

“I know you’re having trouble trusting me again,” I said softly; desperate to touch his face; to push that wet fringe back off his beautiful face, to pull him into my arms and protect him from the rain. To do anything. I didn’t want to fight him on this. “But you know; you know I didn’t do anything.”

“I just,” he said; his vie only just audible over the continuing thunder.

“Just what?” I pushed; taking a cautious step forward. This time he didn’t back away.

“I just,” he looked up and met my eyes. They were glazed with tears. I felt my own eyes pool with tears. “I just don’t want you to...”

“You don’t want me to what?” I needed to know I really fucking needed to know.

I stepped even closer; standing right in front of him. His shirt was sticking to him everywhere; the rain drops slid down his cheeks, his forehead; his forearms. He’s probably freezing. God Alex. Let me hug you. I watched his eyes search mine. Those chocolate coloured orbs filled with desperation and anxiousness.

“Hurt me,” he said finally.

I felt my heart break at his words. The look on his face saying it all. He thinks I’ll hurt him. He thinks I’ll harm him; cause him pain. Fuck. Oh my god. Fuck.

“I don’t want to hurt you,” I said; my voice cracking. “I just want to kiss you. I want to hold your hand. I want to hug you.”

We stood there; our eyes on each other. Alex’s expression growing darker. His eyes filling with tears over and over and them spilling over the edge; joining the rain drops that were pelting us.

“Close your eyes,” I requested.

“What?”

“Close them,” I repeated and Alex slid his eyes closed.

I leaned closer so my mouth was near his ear. I swallowed before speaking.

“You can trust my voice can’t you?” I asked quietly.

Alex nodded slowly.

“Because it wasn’t my voice that hurt you.”

Alex shook his head in response. I slowly slid a hand onto Alex’s cheek and was relieved when he didn’t flinch.

“And it wasn’t my hands that hurt you,” I told him as he leaned into the touch. “It wasn’t my touch that caused you pain.”

He shook his head again. I took a deep breath before leaning in and pressing a feather light kiss on Alex’s rain drenched lips. I pulled away slowly.

“And it wasn’t my kiss that hurt you either,” I licked my lips.

Alex opened his eyes slowly and I slid my other hand onto his face; both sitting on either side of his neck.

“It was my actions. It was them that hurt you, and they’re in the past,” I said confidently. “They’re gone and done for. Clean slate remember? We’re thinking about the future now, aren’t we? The future that is just for you and me.”

Alex stayed silent for a moment; his eyes watching mine again. He shook his head slowly and I frowned.

“Jack. I’d rather think of the present,” he smiled. “The present seems much more important to me. Live in the moment, live for the moment. And take each as it comes. And this moment, though surprising, is a moment I’d love to live in forever.”

I smiled and Alex slid his hands around the back of my neck and pulled my lips down to meet his. I smiled into the kiss as I found this so similar to that first kiss we shared under the stars on that perfect night. The first; both of us reluctant in the smallest of ways, both nervous, both unsure; but in saying that both 100% sure of everything.
♠ ♠ ♠
Alright. Is this all better guys? No more sadness and no more Zack awkwardness.
yep.
anyway!
what'd you think?
please please please comment and let me know! it means so much for your continued support!
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"clicky!