Head on Collision

Alex’s POV

I looked up to the ’EMERGENCY’ written on the side of the building; the big letters threatening bad news. I swallowed as my mum lead me inside; her hand casually at the small of my back. She led the way through the first set of sliding doors, and then another; following the signs that led to the waiting room. A third set of doors slid open before us and I gazed around the room not looking at anything in particular.

I saw Zack look up as the doors opened. His wife beater hung off him, noticeably wet. His jeans were the same; large wet patches at the knees and around the bottom of the cuff. It was what else was on the jeans and wife beater that made me feel sick to the stomach. Blood was smeared across Zack’s thighs and on his shoes. I swallowed again.

He stood up and approached me quickly. I felt him wrap his arms around me, pulling me into a hug. My arms remained lifeless; at my sides. I couldn’t I couldn’t bring myself to hug him. Knowing it was his blood all over him Jack’s blood strewn across the jeans and wife beater that were now touching me. I shivered. Zack was cold.

He stepped away from me and I dropped my gazes, focusing on the floor.

“I’m sorry Alex,” he whispered before moving back toward the others. He didn’t sit. He started pacing.

I looked up to Rian and Kara. Rian sat forward; his elbows resting on his thighs. He pulled the sleeves of his also damp hoodie down over his shaking hands. Kara sat beside him; a phone to her ear.

“Mum. Yes I’m fine. I’m here with Rian,” she smiled sadly up at me. “Jack’s been hurt. School isn’t important at the moment mum. I’ll see you when I get home okay? Love you too.”

I felt sick. The smell of the hospital. The feeling of depression seeping in through the walls. The sympathetic faces of people waiting here with us; colds, broken arms. Kids playing game boys. The occasional older woman reading a month old magazine. It was all too familiar. Overwhelmingly familiar. I pulled the sleeves of my hoodie; Jack’s hoodie, down over my hands and just stood there. I didn’t know what to do with myself.

The doors slid open behind my mum and I and we turned around. We were met with the face of a doctor; a slight mile tugging at the side of his lips. His name tag told me his name was Dr. Johnson. Speak Dr Johnson. Tell me if my baby is okay. I was waiting for it. I’m not going to lie. For the ’I’m sorry, but there’s nothing we can do. ’

The tears were pooling in my eyes. I couldn’t handle this again. I untucked my hands and peered up to the doctor through my untamed hair. I waited for the inevitable.

“Jack Barakat’s family?” he asked the room.

I heard Zack and the others stand behind me. They moved up beside me and one of them took my hand. I didn’t care who it was.

“Yes,” my mum answered him. “How is he? How’s Jack?”

“He’s alright,” the doctor assured us and I felt all the air escape my lungs at once. I felt dizzy. “He’s mildly concussed and there are quite a few bumps and bruises but other than that he’s okay. He’s still unconscious at the moment but it’ll give the pain killers time to do their job.”

“Can I see him?” I whispered; finally breaking my silence. The hand that had mine; squeezed gently.

“Are you related to Mr Barakat?” the doctor asked me; tilting his almost head to the side.

“He’s his boyfriend,” my mum’s voice came from behind me.

He quirked an eyebrow at me before smiling warmly.

“Alright,” he nodded. “Come with me.”

I choked back tears as we followed Dr. Johnson to Jack’s room. The hand still had mine tightly but I pulled it free; grabbing hold of my mum’s arm instead. Dr Johnson stopped in front of the door mark Emergency 3 and pushed the door open for us.

I stepped over the horizon; my hand flew to my mouth instantly.

“Jack,” I whispered; the tears starting to side down my face.

Joyce looked up from the seat beside the bed and smiles sadly at me. She stood up and walked towards us. She laid a comforting hand on my shoulder and squeezed it gently. I kept my eyes trained on Jack. My mum slipped free of my grasp and she and Joyce left the room.

I walked to the foot of the bed and stared down at Jack. There was a fucking lot of bruising. Of that I was sure. Hand prints on his bare chest; large and almost perfectly shaped. There was obvious swelling and bruising on his jaw and blackness under both eyes. His lip was split and there was a cut above his eyes; a small bandage was over it. I shook my head

“You’re a right bastard you know that?” I ran my fingers through my hair; the hood of my sweat shirt falling back off my head.

I watched Jack’s face. There was no sign of acknowledge at all. With a sigh I moved to the char Joyce had recently vacated and perched myself on the edge. I slid my hand across the bed clothes and slid it under Jacks. It was warm. Warmer than mine. There was a drip secured to the back of it. I closed my hand carefully around Jacks.

With my free hand, I manoeuvred myself and the chair closer to Jack’s bedside, resting my head beside Jack’s on the bed.

“You can’t do this to me,” I whispered. “Can you hear me Jack? You can’t do this. You can’t leave me here you asshole. I only just got you back. I’m not ready to let you go.”

Someone cleared their throat in the doorway but I didn’t dare look away from Jack’s face. His eyebrows were drawn together, like he was dreaming. I watched Jacks eyelids; move and flutter as his eyes moved behind them. Was he frowning?

“Um.”

The voice by the door spoke again and this time I looked up. Zack stood there; his hands stuffed in the pockets of his damp and blood smeared jeans. He looked so weathered; tired. His face was tear stained. Fuck. I didn’t even think about how this would affect him and Rian. They were his best friends.

“His injuries are too bad,” Zack told me softly. “He’ll pull through. He’ll be up and at ém in n time.”

Without a second thought, I slid my hand out from under Jack’s and stood up; crossing the room quickly and throwing my arms around Zack’s neck; burying my face in his shoulder. I felt Zack bring his arms up around my back and he held me against him. I relished in the warmth; desperately pushing the thought of Jack’s blood to the back of my mind. I let it all go. I sobbed; I fucking sobbed.

“I thought I’d lost him Zack,” Alex confessed. “I don’t want to lose him. Not again.”

“You aren’t going to.”

“I love him. I love him so much.”

“And he loves you.”

“When you called. Fuck. I laughed. I fucking laughed.

I pulled away; wiping my face angrily on the back of my sleeve.

“You didn’t know,” Zack told me; grabbing my wrists and pulling my hands down away from my face.

I peered up to him through my annoyingly long fringe. I pulled my hands free and tucked it behind my ear. I cast my eyes over to Jack and then back to Zack.

“We sorted everything out. We fixed everything,” I told Zack. “We spent the night just; together. Just like old times. And then. And then this happens. It’s like someone’s punishing me for being so difficult.”

I felt my eyes fill with tears again and I dropped my gaze to my feet. My shoulders shook. I felt Zack cup my cheek with his hand and press a kiss on my forehead. I looked up at him sadly; not being able to make eye contact. Zack’s eyes were glassy; tears shining.

“Don’t be silly Alex. He loves you. He’s in love with you,” Zack held my gaze; a hand settled on each shoulder. “He was confused; sure, about why you were so distant after you got back together, but by the smile that was on his face most of the day today between the sneezing and groaning, I don’t think he's holding it against you. He’s just ecstatic that he’s got you. That’s all that matters. And you’re not being punished. This.” Zack pointed to Jack. “Is just the result of some asshole making trouble. It’s nothing either of you have done.”

“Thank you Zack,” I whispered pathetically after a moment of pondering what he had said.

“Don’t mention it,” he smiled. “Now go back over there. I bet he’ll want you to be the first person he sees when he wakes up.”

I smiled at Zack before turning back to Jack. I heard the door close behind me as I walked towards him. I sat back down and carefully slid my hand back under his holding it loosely.

“I’m back baby,” I told Jack softly. “I’m not going anywhere.”