Head on Collision

Jack’s POV

Alex had stayed at my house a few nights here and there. Or i would stay at his. We were inseparable and in love. Ever since that fateful night he surprised me with that awesome post valentine’s day Italian dinner., we were never apart. And when i say never i mean never; well, except when we have separate classes but other then that. Or when we shower or use the restroom or. Jesus. You get the point. We’re together about 99.9% of the time. In classes, lunch, break, weekends, weeknights. All the time. Every time Rian would ask me what i was doing, id just wink at him and he’d roll his eyes. We’re were a package deal these deals; if someone needed me, they knew that Alex wouldn’t be far behind and vice versa.

Every since that night, it was hard not to have him close to me at all times. We. We had sex. A lot. A hell of a lot. Almost every night. Sometimes it was quick hand jobs at school behind the library, or staying back after gym for a blow job in the shower. We had even returned to that storage space under the stage in the auditorium more than once just because we couldn’t wait. If someone asked me how my sex life was i’d say it was magnificently spectacular. If someone asked Zack or Rian, they'd say we were at it like rabbits. Its true. I’m not denying it. The sex is fucking terrific. We take terms bottoming now; now that ive had my turn. Its like a completely different thing, having me inside of him. Its mind blowing. But i still get off so quick with then image of him writhing beneath me.

Which brings me to today. Its a Wednesday if you want to know. Wednesday night and im bored. Because, unlike every other day in the past fortnight, Alex didn’t come home with me after school. He decided to go home tonight. Which is cool you know because, well. Just because. But he had been sort of quiet today, which was unusual. Especially for Alex; especially lately. On the other hand it had been two days since the last time we, did it. And im a man with needs.

I snagged the cordless home phone from the rocker in the hall way and wandered down to my bedroom; throwing myself down on my bed rather unceremoniously. I punched Alex’s cell number into the phone and waited.

RING RING

i yawned.

RING RING

hey. You’ve reached Alex. Sorry i missed your call. Just tell me who you are and i’ll call you back. Cheers

I frowned as his adorable, regrettably not as English accent answered the call for me. I switched hands and dialed again; sitting up now. Alex never didn’t answer his phone.

hey. You’ve reached Alex. Sorry i missed your call. Just tell me who you are and i’ll call you back. Cheers

I frowned again; choosing to dial his house phone number now. I swung my legs over the side of the bed and waited as the phone rang.

“Good afternoon, Gaskarth residence,” Isobel's voice rang through the phone and i smiled.

“Hey, Isobel. It’s Jack,” i replied.

“Oh,” her voice sounded off; distant. “Hello Jack.”

“Is Alex around?” i asked hopefully.

“Well, yes but i don’t think he’s up for talking to anyone right now,” she answered and i was just about to argue when she spoke again. “Not even you Jack.”

“Oh.”

“It was nice speaking with you,” she told me before hanging up.

I stared at the phone for a second confused. What the fuck was that? Isobel’s never spoken to me like that. Not even when, not even that day when i was screaming up at Alex after the Jasey issue. I frowned. Without even thinking twice, i got up off my bed and pulled on my chucks; slipping a hoodie on as well. On the way down the hall i slipped the phone back into the cradle and made my way outside.

I stuffed my hands into my pockets as i walked. Somethings wrong. Somethings happened. I haven’t done anything wrong have i? No. I don’t think so. School? No. We don’t have any issues there. The bands good. The musics good. Rian and Zack and the girls are good. I chewed my lip; thinking of any possibility. I came up empty. As far as i knew life was sweet.

I stared at the front door; contemplating whether or not to bang on the door and demanding to see him; demanding to know what has the Gaskarth residence so riled up and different i turned my gaze upwards to the doors that led to Alex’s room and decided on another option. I moved to the tree; pulling myself up, thankfully for the practice. I hauled myself over the balcony carefully and quietly and leaned against it before making my slowly to the door. Thankfully the curtains were pulled open.

I peered through the glass, finding my boyfriend sitting on his bed; legs crossed, a giant book opened in front of him. His shoulders were slumped his face screwed up unhappily. I took my chances and pushed down on the handle. It opened and i pushed the door into the room.

Alex looked up quickly, shocked at the intrusion. His face crumpled, his expression softened. I didn’t know what that expression was. I was usually so good at reading him.

“Lex?” i whispered; walking a little closer to him.

He looked so broken. He dropped the book onto the floor and got up; flying across the room and crashing into me. I stumbled a little before steadying myself holding onto him tightly. He broke down. Right there in my arms. The sobs racked his tiny body, his tears soaked through the neck of my t-shirt.

“Hey hey hey,” i tried to sooth him. “I’m here.”

He continued to sob and i felt so helpless. His knees were giving way. His whole body was trembling.

“Come, sit,” i moved us; trying not to let him go; towards the bed and sat down. He sat n my lap immediately, tucking his face into my neck again.

I wrapped careful arms around his back gently rubbing circles on his back

“It'll be alright Lex,” i told him. “Whatever it is. I’m here. It’ll be alright.”

He shook his head against me and i felt my own shoulders slump in defeat.

“Whats going on?” i asked.

“It’s. It’s,” he tried to answer; his voice wavering completely. It didn’t even sound like Alex. His voice was so broken.

“It’s what baby?” i pushed a little.

“Its a year today Jack.”

I looked at him confused for a second before it dawned on me. March. August was five months after. It was the anniversary of Daniel’s death. Oh.

“Oh baby,” i didn’t even know what to say. What do you say in a situation like this...?

“I don’t. I don’t know what else to say,” i admitted and Alex shook his head.

“There’s nothing to say,” he told me; wrapping his arms around me and trying to move closer. “Just, h-hold me. Please.”

“Always,” i promised. “Hey. Stand up a sec.”

Alex stood up and i kicked off my shoes; moving to lay down on the made bed. I held my arms out to him in invitation and the smallest of smiled appeared on his face. Just the subtle upturn of the right side of his mouth. I gestured with my head for him to join me and he did; curling into my side; his head on my chest. His body trembled again as the tears took over.

“Just let them out, Lex,” i told him; holding him close to me; my fingers racing patterns against his back. ”Let them out.”

He cried for what felt like hours; the sun went down while we lay there. My arms lever left him; his head never left my chest, the tears never stopped. Gently, his sobs slowed, his breathing calming, the tears drying up and sleep consumed him. He cried himself into unconsciousness.

I sighed as i stared up at the ceiling. My thoughts consuming me. I could never imagine how this would feel. If Mae or Joe were to do what Daniel did. I fight with them all the time; but losing them so abruptly, i couldn’t deal. I don’t know how he does it. Stands there every day. A smile on his face. It makes me respect him so much more.

A quiet knock on the door breaks me out of my thoughts and i lift my head form the pillow when the door opens. It’s Isobel.

“oh Jack! I didn’t...” she starts but i cut her off with a finger to my lips.

“He’s asleep,” i tell her; glancing down at my boyfriend.

Isobel turned slowly; leaving the door open. She was gone just a moment before coming back with a blanket. I smiled at her in thanks. She unfolded the blanket wordlessly and draped it over the too of us; gently brushing Alex’s hair off his forehead and kissing it gently.

She touched the hand i hand on Alex’s shoulder briefly.

“you’re good for him Jack, wonderful even,” she gushed and i blushed a little. “do you need anything?”

“Can you call my mum and tell her im staying here?” i requested. “I think id like to be here when he wakes up. If that alright.”

“Certainly,” she whispered; a soft smile gracing her features. “He’s lucky to have you Jack.”

I smiled fondly down at Alex; his soft expression, the gentle smile warming my heart. I loked back up to Isobel.

“I think i’m the lucky one.”