Candescent

The next few weeks passed so quickly that I was amazed when McGonagall came around with exam timetables one morning.

“Ms. Granger,” she said, passing one to Hermione. “Oh! Ms. Tyler I've given yours to Mr. Zabini.”

“Thanks professor,” I answered as she continued down the table. “You’d think she’d have realised that I barely ever sit at the Slytherin table.”

“What is with that?” Hermione inquired. “You’re friends with Zabini aren’t you?”

“Yeah,” I replied. “But you’re my best friend.”

“Really?” Looking at her face, I saw that she honestly didn’t believe we could be best friends. Affronted I looked away and stared at my food which I hastily ate.

“Alyssa,” Hermione started. “I'm sorry, I didn’t know you felt that way. Tell you what from now on you are my best friend.”

“Hermione…” I trailed off looking at her doubtfully. “You don’t have to say it just to make me feel better. I understand that being friends with a Slytherin has its downside. I'll see you later.”

“Wait,” she called after me but I was already gone. Wiping the quickly forming tears from my eyes I ran to my dormitory. Sitting on my bed I let all the unformed tears fall as everything that had happened in the past few months finally caught up with me.

I was a Slytherin. There was no changing that – so I'd better get used to it.

I missed first period because I was writing to my mum. I kept having to repair my quill because I was squeezing it so hard that it kept on breaking.

There was so much going through my mind that I kind of wanted to fall asleep to shut it all up. There were facts and data mixing with voices and orders making my head an archaic place to be. I had to shut it up. I had to get rid of the voices. I needed to see Dumbledore.

The halls were devoid of students as I ran distractedly through the castle. Before I even got to the second floor, Professor McGonagall had found me and berated me for being out of class.

“I need to see Professor Dumbledore,” I said when she asked me why I wasn’t in class. “I need to talk to him about…family problems.”

“Of course,” Professor McGonagall nodded, “I've heard of your loss. Certainly you may see Professor Dumbledore. I'll excuse you from today’s lessons if you wish.”

“Thank you Professor,” I answered, leaving her presence as quickly as possible as my head began to pound again. Walking past an open doorway I saw my class sitting down as Professor Quirrell lectured haltingly but I didn’t stop to listen.

“Sugar Quills,” I said to the gargoyle outside Dumbledore’s office. It moved to allow me passage to the office and when I opened the door at the top of the stairs I found Dumbledore sitting at his desk, reading a book behind his half-moon spectacles.

“Alyssa Tyler,” Dumbledore commented. “What hangs on your conscience child?”

“Nothing’s hanging,” I answered. “Something’s doing chin-ups on it. Have you found any information on these cursed scars?”

“Not particularly,” he replied slowly. “Why, has something else happened?”

I hesitated. After all, that episode in the Forbidden Forest wouldn’t have happened if I'd kept to the rules and stayed in my dormitory.

“I was er, walking the other day. It was near the forest and there was well, an extreme amount of pain in my head. And erm….voices. There have been a few voices.”

“Voices?”

“Like they’re having a conversation. One seems to yell a lot too.” As I was listening to myself speak I was also hearing the complete craziness that the words were reminiscent of. I decided to not continue explaining about the voices.

“Hmm.” The professor actually seemed to consider my words rather than throwing them away as the words of a crazy person. “It could be that perhaps your scar is linking you to other people.”

“It guessed that too sir,” I answered. “And I have a feeling that one of them is a less than welcome person.”

Dumbledore looked at me expectantly from behind his half-mooned spectacles. “It was…Voldemort sir.”

Other than a slight rising of his eyebrows, Dumbledore merely pressed on, “And what led you to believe this Alyssa?”

“I've had…nightmares since I was a child sir. Nightmares about the night he killed James and Lily Potter, so I recognise his voice. It’s hard to forget.”

“And, you say another argues?”

I nodded. “But I don’t know who.”

“I will search for these answers Alyssa,” Professor Dumbledore replied. “But is that all?”

“Um…not really,” I continued. “I'm really ahead in all my school work.”

“Yes Professor Snape has approached the matter with me. However, I have a feeling this knowledge will pass with time.”

“But how can you know sir?” I asked quickly. “Every time I learn something that’s supposedly new, I already know all the answers. Whenever I read a chapter of my textbook I skim it because I know I’ve read it before. When I'm doing my homework, I don’t need reference books – I just write. With that comes top marks only one or two lower than Hermione Granger. I don’t study. I don’t pay attention in class. I honestly do not know why I am a walking encyclopaedia for everything to do with the Wizarding world and I hate it. And now I'm getting a headache again.”

“Alyssa, I promise you that I will look into these matters. But I have an appointment. Perhaps, if your headaches continue, I advise you to see Madame Pomfrey. Her pain potions far exceed my own spells.”

“Of course Professor,” I answered, sorry that I had taken up so much of his time with my ranting.

“Good luck with your exams Alyssa,” he answered as I left. “Although, from what you’ve told me, assuredly you don’t need it.”

I let a sad smile grace my face as I walked outside and down the corridor. A sharp twinge shot down my face as I walked away but I didn’t notice Professor Quirrell walking towards Dumbledore’s office muttering silently under his breath.