Status: :)
You're All I Know
one.
We were sitting in my apartment, just sitting. Like usual, but when she sat on the opposite couch as me and looked at me desperately, her hazel eyes tired and sad. Those weren't the same eyes I remember from our meeting, I could still smell the stiff air, it was when everyone was away for spring break and I was home alone. I don't do so good alone, after a good hour of so of blankly watching the TV, not even comprehending anything that had been playing.
////
I sighed standing up and finally deciding on a walk, I scratched my bare stomach and looked around for a t-shirt and finally found an american-apparel baseball shirt and tugged it on. I yawned and found a random pair of flip flops on the floor. I felt something wet touch my fingers and looked down to see my mutt Doug wagging his tail recognizing I was leaving, I shrugged and grabbed his leash and took off for the night air.
Strangely when the sun went down it was cooler than I expected, but not enough to complain, I looked down and saw a shoe, a girl's shoe. Doug was wagging his tail like mad and I picked it up curiously before I realized Doug had darted off as soon as my grip loosened.
"Doug! Ah you dick! Get back here!" I called out running after him while still holding the shoe. Finally I saw him in the arms of a girl, she was petting him and missing one shoe. "Hey sorry about him, he just gets a little excited," I said nervously rubbing my arm.
"Aw, I don't mind, he's a sweetie. Yes you are," She petted, swaying a little. I cocked my head at her, realizing she was probably a little drunk as she was in the yard of a house party. I guess I wasn't invited.
"So... uh... this wouldn't happen to be your shoe would it?" I asked holding it up in the lights, pouring out from the house so she could see it.
"Oh my goodness! I was looking all over for that!" She gasped excitedly before getting up, holding Doug's leash. "Thank you so much! I'll trade you," She smirked holding up the leash.
"Sounds fair," I laughed grabbing the leash and handing her the shoe. Her eyes were almost yellow, maybe it was just the moonlight or the fact it was two in the morning. I studied her face, her almond shaped eyes over a pert nose, speckled perfectly with freckles, not too many, but just enough. Her smile dimpled her cheeks, which were a little red.
"So what's a young man like you doing on a block like this this time of night?" She asked while leaning down to slip on the ballet flat.
"Well you know, out shenanigan-ing and contemplating the karmic distribution and ultimate meanings of life," I laughed shrugging a little, my sarcasm fading as the intensity between us began making me nervous.
"Oh, you know I could use a little epiphany talk, better than getting chased with water guns," She laughed nodding towards the house, I didn't really wanna know more. Then she started walking away, Doug eager to go with her, I couldn't help but follow.
"So what's your name?" I asked, she was relatively tall maybe five-five, five-six, but I still towered over her. I couldn't help but smile, she had a skinny frame and perfect tan underneath a white sundress that blew in the occasional breezes.
"Adeline Marie Summers," She recited louder than she should at the time of night, but I didn't mind it, she turned back to me and smiled. "What about you?"
"John O'Callaghan," I returned and she stopped dead in her tracks and looked me dead in the eye, a certain severity in her eye.
"What's your full name?" She said before finally cracking a smile.
"John Cornelius O'Callaghan," I said quickly and embarrassed, trying not to see her reaction of disbelief then comic relief.
"Really? That's amazing, you have, like, the bible-ist-y name I've ever heard!" Adeline exclaimed, her laughter dying down and her turning to look me in the eye, a smile spread across her face, dimples engaged.
"Thanks? So do you always go on walks with random strangers in the middle of the night?" I asked, half-joking and half-serious because I was relatively certain I'd never meet another girl like her, and the whole stranger danger thing we learned in grade school.
"Well, no, in both aspects, because you're the first guy I've ever met while I happened to be in a front lawn drunk enough to and also because we're not strangers anymore," She smiled before looking over to a house with the porch light on and smiled at me again. "So thanks for walking me home, please don't, like, stalk me," She chuckled lightly a little bit towards the end then surprised me by kissing my cheek then kissing Doug lightly on the top of his head. She started walking up the walkway to the house and I felt a rush to tell her anything.
"What if I wanted to call you?" I called out across the lawn. She turned around, her dress swinging, then resting back on her gentle curves.
"Then you should!" She smiled and I laughed pulling out my phone and waving it, I really hope she got that I meant I wanted her number and she did. "Ready? 480-555-2683!"
"I'll call you," I yelled again as she made her way to a sturdy oak door then began to open it.
"You better!" She yelled before taking a step into the house and putting a hand on each side of the doorway. "Good night John Cornelius O'Callaghan!" She called out a smile gleaming even in the dark.
"Good night Adeline Marie Summers!" I heard her giggle before she shut the door and Doug made a strange noise before looking up at me as we started to walk home. "Dude I know, she's.. something new."
////
"John?" She asked, her voice cool and calming, I shot up realizing that I had been out for a while. Her yellow eyes were wearing more makeup that before, before she moved off to God-knows-where, California. Before she left without a trace and never called.
"Yeah?" I asked, Kennedy came in from the kitchen we shared and sat between us smiling obliviously. I was suddenly was longing for the moment it was just us on this couch, and I could maybe pretend it was like when we were still in love. Still together.
"So how my two best friends doing?" She asked finally cracking a smile, her eyes lit up a little bit and looked into mine again. The word 'friends' stung me, there was some point in our relationship where 'friend' had a 'boy' in front of it and 'mate' had a 'soul' in front of it.
"Good, touring is awesome. How's college?" Kennedy asked trying to keep the conversation going, but my mind was already gone. That time when we were happy, and after a slightly awkward first date and a couple dates after that. After she had been welcomed with open arms into my group of friends and after I had finally gathered the courage to ask her to be my girlfriend. Just us, I had some of the happiest times of my life.
\\\\\
The one day I woke up just to my own internal clock and looked down and saw her curled up still in my arms. Just the sheets on top of us and her hair was a mess, but it still looked good. The lazy afternoon light poured in through blinds in a light haze, the perfect mood for the day. I rubbed her arm lightly with the tips of my fingers, kissing the top of her head.
"Mmm," She moaned looking up and smiling, she stretched out and then fell back into the crevice of my shoulder. "So last night was amazing," She let out a little giggle and I couldn't help but detect some sarcasm.
"What do you mean?" I asked pulling away from her a little bit. I had only slept with one girl before her and I suddenly became self conscious. She smiled and stretched again.
"Well that's what they always say in movies, I don't know," She smiled while feeling around for clothes that had been ripped off and thrown everywhere. I realized she didn't mean anything by it, but I couldn't help but feel...
"But how was it? I mean, you know, it?" I asked and she held the sheet over her chest and looked back over to me with kind eyes, then suddenly changed her demeanor raising an eyebrow suggestively.
"I don't think I have enough of a knowledge base to make a firm assessment," She smiled biting her lip and I played along, laughing and looking at her wiggle her eyebrows and giggling slightly.
"Oh really? Did you know what you just said?" I asked sitting up a little and she started sliding back over to me and bit her lip, looking at mine and then kissed me lightly.
"Nope, shut up," She laughed before pressing lips against mine and the same nervousness shook through my muscles, I slid my tongue between her lips and pulled her body into mine and we escaped to under the cotton sheets again.
"Okay, that was amazing," She smiled and kissed me gently again before seemingly alarmed jumped up and grabbed my dress shirt and slipped it on, "but now I need food. God how cliche are we? Having sex after prom?" She laughed before she was out of the room and before I could realize what had just happened.
I chased after her once putting on some boxers and basketball shorts. She was always moving 1,000 miles per hour and I would always gladly run to keep up. She was on her tip-toes in my pantry digging around, like it was her house. I was really glad my parents weren't home because this would probably be hard to explain, upon finding the strawberry pop tarts she smiled childishly and pulled another pack for me.
"So what do you want to do today?" I asked opening my pack and finishing it, in record time. She looked stunned and then finally shrugged.
"We could do anything, let's do everything!" She said a big grin spread across her face, I had no idea what she had in mind, but I trusted her. Enough. "Let's start with the zoo?" She asked taking my wrapper and giving me the rest of her uneaten pop tart and throwing away the trash.
"I think I love you," I said before I had even realized what I said. I looked up and she looked over at me ignoring the statement I had just said. She devoured one pop tart and gave me her extra smiling like an innocent little girl. It was actually weird how she could maintain that childish outlook despite doing so much in the world.
"No time to waste," She smiled while looking around for pants finally settling on some shorts she had left here from swimming a couple of weeks ago. Even after getting up, throwing random clothes on and getting zero sleep she looked amazing. She caught me staring at her and walked up to me and kissed my cheek surprising me. "I'm scared I love you," she whispered before shaking her car keys in my face and changing her demeanor completely. That was probably the moment I went from think to know and Adeline had changed my life forever.
\\\\\
"John?" I heard before someone punched me in the arm, followed by snickers of laughter. I looked up and saw Garrett and Jared had walked in and Kennedy was holding a fist up still. I punched him back and looked over at her smiling with Jared and Garrett, them hugging her after a long time apart. It never should've been like this. She caught me staring at her and I looked away quickly.
"John?" She asked, her voice calm again, I looked over at her smiling a little and realizing that there was concern in her eyes, gave me hope. At least she cared about me in some little way. "Are you okay?" No. I'm not fucking okay, I was fine until you came back into my life. That was a lie though, because I was never fine with her gone, it never felt right.
"Fine," I smiled. I must have looked like shit, being alone was never good for me. I went into some catatonic state, not sleeping, functioning or eating, just thinking of her. Thinking of why she left me and how much I loved her, I loved her to a point that I hated love because of her.
Everything could've been a movie, the way her long dark brown hair skimmed her shoulders, they way I kissed her to make everything feel alright again, the way we could laugh at nothing and everything was fine. All good things must end I guess.
"Well shit dude, we're gonna be late to the party," Garrett said pushing Jared to go make a beer run before we got the house. I looked down at my random shirt and skinny jeans, I didn't really put effort into anything anymore. She looked up and straightened her black strapless dress stealing looks at me.
"Oh yeah, do you want anything before we head over?" Kennedy asked looking at both of us. We shook our heads and suddenly were alone again. I opened my mouth, to tell her I missed her and I still had feelings, but then I realized these feelings I had weren't really strong enough to ruin whatever this relationship was if she didn't feel the same way. Maybe I was just lying to myself, but I'd take with her over nothing at all. So I closed my lips and she sucked in a sharp breath, like she was ready to say something when Kennedy walked back in. "Ready to go?" She closed her mouth and smiled at me, then looked to Kennedy.
"Yeah, so ready," She said, her voice cool and her mind impossible to read. I stood up and followed them out. That's when I got into my zone, where I let thoughts take me and this world leave me. People would laugh and I had no idea what was really happening but soon we were there. We all got out of the car, it was obvious that the party was already pretty started up and big so we just walked right into the storm. I drank, and drank to forget about her maybe. Or maybe just to feel the familiar swirl in my mind, suddenly everything was too loud. I was surrounded by girls I didn't recognize and I had to get out. I bolted for the front lawn, and suddenly it was quiet. The stars shone brightly above me and I felt the hot sting of tears, it was just like when she left.
I had woken up early, for no reason, but the odd sense that I should and saw that she was gone from my arms, where she had been sleeping. There was a note but all it said was 'John, I love you, but I can't stay here. Please don't come looking for me. I wish I could explain. Love Forever, Addie'. She couldn't even explain.
I looked up at the stars, the same sky as when we met and when she left and I looked at a tree punching it hard. "SHIT!" I yelled angrily and finally crashing down to the ground in subtle tears and ripping at the grass. "Shit," I whispered before hearing the front door open. I looked up and wiped my eyes quickly, but they were still blurred, finally I saw it was Adeline, still in her fitted black dress.
"This seems vaguely familiar," She said, a playful tone in her voice. No shit sherlock. She took one look at me before realizing something was wrong, but I shot up trying to walk away from her, these fucked up feelings. "John, John stop!" She said, her voice finally showing some emotion. What the fuck did she want from me?
"What Addie?" I raised my voice finally relasing years of pent up resentment, "what?" She looked taken back that it had come to this, but she didn't back down, because she just wouldn't be her if she didn't back down.
"You look like shit," She said bluntly and I couldn't help but laugh. She smiled sympathetically and her soft hand came to my face, so that I could only see her, nothing else.
"Yeah, well I feel like shit, so," I laughed lightly and her shoulders relaxed a little, but she was still on guard. Like I was going to attack her of something.
"I missed you, so, so much," She said stepping closer, her bright eyes turning yellow with the moon again. This was more than anyone should have to take. I forced myself not to think about the past, not about her eyes the first time we met. I allowed myself to become engrossed in the moment, in her.
"You didn't have to, you could've stayed instead of leaving in the middle of the night without a trace. You could've stayed and been here, with me instead of some place that no one even knew you!" I said my voice dead serious, but a playful smirk still remained on her lips, pissing me off. How could she be smiling right now?
"Should I explain?" She asked, me scoffing sarcastically as a fuck yeah, she gave me a look and I stopped before actually saying the words. "I was scared, I was so incredibly terrified of falling in love, so I left," She dragged off, just as I opened my lips to respond she started speaking again, "but it happened anyways, so trick's on me. Then it was a waiting game, every time I came home you were on tour and every time you went to L.A. something always came up."
"You could've called," I bit my lip from telling her how completely stupid she had been.
"It's not exactly something you tell someone on the phone," She looked down at the grass beneath us racked with guilt, but then looked up at me with those mesmerizing eyes. Her fingertips tracing down my cheek towards my lips, her lips parting so eagerly it was like we were never apart. I bent down and kissed her with the passion I could only feel with her. There was a synergy between us, something bonding us like something metaphysical, skeptics would demand explanations even though its something you just have to know. Like just knowing that someone is your soulmate and I knew it was her. I knew it all along.
////
I sighed standing up and finally deciding on a walk, I scratched my bare stomach and looked around for a t-shirt and finally found an american-apparel baseball shirt and tugged it on. I yawned and found a random pair of flip flops on the floor. I felt something wet touch my fingers and looked down to see my mutt Doug wagging his tail recognizing I was leaving, I shrugged and grabbed his leash and took off for the night air.
Strangely when the sun went down it was cooler than I expected, but not enough to complain, I looked down and saw a shoe, a girl's shoe. Doug was wagging his tail like mad and I picked it up curiously before I realized Doug had darted off as soon as my grip loosened.
"Doug! Ah you dick! Get back here!" I called out running after him while still holding the shoe. Finally I saw him in the arms of a girl, she was petting him and missing one shoe. "Hey sorry about him, he just gets a little excited," I said nervously rubbing my arm.
"Aw, I don't mind, he's a sweetie. Yes you are," She petted, swaying a little. I cocked my head at her, realizing she was probably a little drunk as she was in the yard of a house party. I guess I wasn't invited.
"So... uh... this wouldn't happen to be your shoe would it?" I asked holding it up in the lights, pouring out from the house so she could see it.
"Oh my goodness! I was looking all over for that!" She gasped excitedly before getting up, holding Doug's leash. "Thank you so much! I'll trade you," She smirked holding up the leash.
"Sounds fair," I laughed grabbing the leash and handing her the shoe. Her eyes were almost yellow, maybe it was just the moonlight or the fact it was two in the morning. I studied her face, her almond shaped eyes over a pert nose, speckled perfectly with freckles, not too many, but just enough. Her smile dimpled her cheeks, which were a little red.
"So what's a young man like you doing on a block like this this time of night?" She asked while leaning down to slip on the ballet flat.
"Well you know, out shenanigan-ing and contemplating the karmic distribution and ultimate meanings of life," I laughed shrugging a little, my sarcasm fading as the intensity between us began making me nervous.
"Oh, you know I could use a little epiphany talk, better than getting chased with water guns," She laughed nodding towards the house, I didn't really wanna know more. Then she started walking away, Doug eager to go with her, I couldn't help but follow.
"So what's your name?" I asked, she was relatively tall maybe five-five, five-six, but I still towered over her. I couldn't help but smile, she had a skinny frame and perfect tan underneath a white sundress that blew in the occasional breezes.
"Adeline Marie Summers," She recited louder than she should at the time of night, but I didn't mind it, she turned back to me and smiled. "What about you?"
"John O'Callaghan," I returned and she stopped dead in her tracks and looked me dead in the eye, a certain severity in her eye.
"What's your full name?" She said before finally cracking a smile.
"John Cornelius O'Callaghan," I said quickly and embarrassed, trying not to see her reaction of disbelief then comic relief.
"Really? That's amazing, you have, like, the bible-ist-y name I've ever heard!" Adeline exclaimed, her laughter dying down and her turning to look me in the eye, a smile spread across her face, dimples engaged.
"Thanks? So do you always go on walks with random strangers in the middle of the night?" I asked, half-joking and half-serious because I was relatively certain I'd never meet another girl like her, and the whole stranger danger thing we learned in grade school.
"Well, no, in both aspects, because you're the first guy I've ever met while I happened to be in a front lawn drunk enough to and also because we're not strangers anymore," She smiled before looking over to a house with the porch light on and smiled at me again. "So thanks for walking me home, please don't, like, stalk me," She chuckled lightly a little bit towards the end then surprised me by kissing my cheek then kissing Doug lightly on the top of his head. She started walking up the walkway to the house and I felt a rush to tell her anything.
"What if I wanted to call you?" I called out across the lawn. She turned around, her dress swinging, then resting back on her gentle curves.
"Then you should!" She smiled and I laughed pulling out my phone and waving it, I really hope she got that I meant I wanted her number and she did. "Ready? 480-555-2683!"
"I'll call you," I yelled again as she made her way to a sturdy oak door then began to open it.
"You better!" She yelled before taking a step into the house and putting a hand on each side of the doorway. "Good night John Cornelius O'Callaghan!" She called out a smile gleaming even in the dark.
"Good night Adeline Marie Summers!" I heard her giggle before she shut the door and Doug made a strange noise before looking up at me as we started to walk home. "Dude I know, she's.. something new."
////
"John?" She asked, her voice cool and calming, I shot up realizing that I had been out for a while. Her yellow eyes were wearing more makeup that before, before she moved off to God-knows-where, California. Before she left without a trace and never called.
"Yeah?" I asked, Kennedy came in from the kitchen we shared and sat between us smiling obliviously. I was suddenly was longing for the moment it was just us on this couch, and I could maybe pretend it was like when we were still in love. Still together.
"So how my two best friends doing?" She asked finally cracking a smile, her eyes lit up a little bit and looked into mine again. The word 'friends' stung me, there was some point in our relationship where 'friend' had a 'boy' in front of it and 'mate' had a 'soul' in front of it.
"Good, touring is awesome. How's college?" Kennedy asked trying to keep the conversation going, but my mind was already gone. That time when we were happy, and after a slightly awkward first date and a couple dates after that. After she had been welcomed with open arms into my group of friends and after I had finally gathered the courage to ask her to be my girlfriend. Just us, I had some of the happiest times of my life.
\\\\\
The one day I woke up just to my own internal clock and looked down and saw her curled up still in my arms. Just the sheets on top of us and her hair was a mess, but it still looked good. The lazy afternoon light poured in through blinds in a light haze, the perfect mood for the day. I rubbed her arm lightly with the tips of my fingers, kissing the top of her head.
"Mmm," She moaned looking up and smiling, she stretched out and then fell back into the crevice of my shoulder. "So last night was amazing," She let out a little giggle and I couldn't help but detect some sarcasm.
"What do you mean?" I asked pulling away from her a little bit. I had only slept with one girl before her and I suddenly became self conscious. She smiled and stretched again.
"Well that's what they always say in movies, I don't know," She smiled while feeling around for clothes that had been ripped off and thrown everywhere. I realized she didn't mean anything by it, but I couldn't help but feel...
"But how was it? I mean, you know, it?" I asked and she held the sheet over her chest and looked back over to me with kind eyes, then suddenly changed her demeanor raising an eyebrow suggestively.
"I don't think I have enough of a knowledge base to make a firm assessment," She smiled biting her lip and I played along, laughing and looking at her wiggle her eyebrows and giggling slightly.
"Oh really? Did you know what you just said?" I asked sitting up a little and she started sliding back over to me and bit her lip, looking at mine and then kissed me lightly.
"Nope, shut up," She laughed before pressing lips against mine and the same nervousness shook through my muscles, I slid my tongue between her lips and pulled her body into mine and we escaped to under the cotton sheets again.
"Okay, that was amazing," She smiled and kissed me gently again before seemingly alarmed jumped up and grabbed my dress shirt and slipped it on, "but now I need food. God how cliche are we? Having sex after prom?" She laughed before she was out of the room and before I could realize what had just happened.
I chased after her once putting on some boxers and basketball shorts. She was always moving 1,000 miles per hour and I would always gladly run to keep up. She was on her tip-toes in my pantry digging around, like it was her house. I was really glad my parents weren't home because this would probably be hard to explain, upon finding the strawberry pop tarts she smiled childishly and pulled another pack for me.
"So what do you want to do today?" I asked opening my pack and finishing it, in record time. She looked stunned and then finally shrugged.
"We could do anything, let's do everything!" She said a big grin spread across her face, I had no idea what she had in mind, but I trusted her. Enough. "Let's start with the zoo?" She asked taking my wrapper and giving me the rest of her uneaten pop tart and throwing away the trash.
"I think I love you," I said before I had even realized what I said. I looked up and she looked over at me ignoring the statement I had just said. She devoured one pop tart and gave me her extra smiling like an innocent little girl. It was actually weird how she could maintain that childish outlook despite doing so much in the world.
"No time to waste," She smiled while looking around for pants finally settling on some shorts she had left here from swimming a couple of weeks ago. Even after getting up, throwing random clothes on and getting zero sleep she looked amazing. She caught me staring at her and walked up to me and kissed my cheek surprising me. "I'm scared I love you," she whispered before shaking her car keys in my face and changing her demeanor completely. That was probably the moment I went from think to know and Adeline had changed my life forever.
\\\\\
"John?" I heard before someone punched me in the arm, followed by snickers of laughter. I looked up and saw Garrett and Jared had walked in and Kennedy was holding a fist up still. I punched him back and looked over at her smiling with Jared and Garrett, them hugging her after a long time apart. It never should've been like this. She caught me staring at her and I looked away quickly.
"John?" She asked, her voice calm again, I looked over at her smiling a little and realizing that there was concern in her eyes, gave me hope. At least she cared about me in some little way. "Are you okay?" No. I'm not fucking okay, I was fine until you came back into my life. That was a lie though, because I was never fine with her gone, it never felt right.
"Fine," I smiled. I must have looked like shit, being alone was never good for me. I went into some catatonic state, not sleeping, functioning or eating, just thinking of her. Thinking of why she left me and how much I loved her, I loved her to a point that I hated love because of her.
Everything could've been a movie, the way her long dark brown hair skimmed her shoulders, they way I kissed her to make everything feel alright again, the way we could laugh at nothing and everything was fine. All good things must end I guess.
"Well shit dude, we're gonna be late to the party," Garrett said pushing Jared to go make a beer run before we got the house. I looked down at my random shirt and skinny jeans, I didn't really put effort into anything anymore. She looked up and straightened her black strapless dress stealing looks at me.
"Oh yeah, do you want anything before we head over?" Kennedy asked looking at both of us. We shook our heads and suddenly were alone again. I opened my mouth, to tell her I missed her and I still had feelings, but then I realized these feelings I had weren't really strong enough to ruin whatever this relationship was if she didn't feel the same way. Maybe I was just lying to myself, but I'd take with her over nothing at all. So I closed my lips and she sucked in a sharp breath, like she was ready to say something when Kennedy walked back in. "Ready to go?" She closed her mouth and smiled at me, then looked to Kennedy.
"Yeah, so ready," She said, her voice cool and her mind impossible to read. I stood up and followed them out. That's when I got into my zone, where I let thoughts take me and this world leave me. People would laugh and I had no idea what was really happening but soon we were there. We all got out of the car, it was obvious that the party was already pretty started up and big so we just walked right into the storm. I drank, and drank to forget about her maybe. Or maybe just to feel the familiar swirl in my mind, suddenly everything was too loud. I was surrounded by girls I didn't recognize and I had to get out. I bolted for the front lawn, and suddenly it was quiet. The stars shone brightly above me and I felt the hot sting of tears, it was just like when she left.
I had woken up early, for no reason, but the odd sense that I should and saw that she was gone from my arms, where she had been sleeping. There was a note but all it said was 'John, I love you, but I can't stay here. Please don't come looking for me. I wish I could explain. Love Forever, Addie'. She couldn't even explain.
I looked up at the stars, the same sky as when we met and when she left and I looked at a tree punching it hard. "SHIT!" I yelled angrily and finally crashing down to the ground in subtle tears and ripping at the grass. "Shit," I whispered before hearing the front door open. I looked up and wiped my eyes quickly, but they were still blurred, finally I saw it was Adeline, still in her fitted black dress.
"This seems vaguely familiar," She said, a playful tone in her voice. No shit sherlock. She took one look at me before realizing something was wrong, but I shot up trying to walk away from her, these fucked up feelings. "John, John stop!" She said, her voice finally showing some emotion. What the fuck did she want from me?
"What Addie?" I raised my voice finally relasing years of pent up resentment, "what?" She looked taken back that it had come to this, but she didn't back down, because she just wouldn't be her if she didn't back down.
"You look like shit," She said bluntly and I couldn't help but laugh. She smiled sympathetically and her soft hand came to my face, so that I could only see her, nothing else.
"Yeah, well I feel like shit, so," I laughed lightly and her shoulders relaxed a little, but she was still on guard. Like I was going to attack her of something.
"I missed you, so, so much," She said stepping closer, her bright eyes turning yellow with the moon again. This was more than anyone should have to take. I forced myself not to think about the past, not about her eyes the first time we met. I allowed myself to become engrossed in the moment, in her.
"You didn't have to, you could've stayed instead of leaving in the middle of the night without a trace. You could've stayed and been here, with me instead of some place that no one even knew you!" I said my voice dead serious, but a playful smirk still remained on her lips, pissing me off. How could she be smiling right now?
"Should I explain?" She asked, me scoffing sarcastically as a fuck yeah, she gave me a look and I stopped before actually saying the words. "I was scared, I was so incredibly terrified of falling in love, so I left," She dragged off, just as I opened my lips to respond she started speaking again, "but it happened anyways, so trick's on me. Then it was a waiting game, every time I came home you were on tour and every time you went to L.A. something always came up."
"You could've called," I bit my lip from telling her how completely stupid she had been.
"It's not exactly something you tell someone on the phone," She looked down at the grass beneath us racked with guilt, but then looked up at me with those mesmerizing eyes. Her fingertips tracing down my cheek towards my lips, her lips parting so eagerly it was like we were never apart. I bent down and kissed her with the passion I could only feel with her. There was a synergy between us, something bonding us like something metaphysical, skeptics would demand explanations even though its something you just have to know. Like just knowing that someone is your soulmate and I knew it was her. I knew it all along.